The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

I Didn’t See That Coming

I didn’t see that coming – but can I choose positivity over negativity for this?


Things happen outside of our control every single day.

Most are majorly insignificant. Getting cut-off in traffic, having someone hold an elevator for you, unexpected text messages, learning your favorite actor is in a movie, sudden downpours, and so forth. No big deal, these things are frequent occurrences.

Some are annoying, frustrating, irritating, and negative. Others are pleasing, encouraging, helpful, and positive. Either way, they happen and tend to have little overall impact.

But then, there are the bigger things that happen. Good or bad, the reaction you have to them might be, “I didn’t see that coming.”

Because we live in a fear-based society, this is most often associated with the negative. “I didn’t see that coming” implies unexpected negatives. Car accidents, homes burning down, firings, break-ups, and deaths all get tied into this statement.

Thus, more often than not, expecting the unexpected tends to skew negatively. What’s going to go wrong this time? What’s the worst-case scenario? How will this fall apart? And no matter what we plan, we still wind up thinking that I didn’t see that coming.

What if, rather than be constantly on the lookout for negatives – we stay grounded and be on the lookout for positives?

To control this, of course, requires practicing mindfulness.

Mindfulness and reason

Mindfulness is the starting point for looking at the world in a positive or negative light.

I postulate that the main reason we live in a fear-based society is that most people live subconsciously. They are, at best, half-awake. They go through life by rote and routine, oblivious to how empowered they truly are.

Then, to add insult to injury, they are frequently disempowered by every stripe of leader they follow. From parents to bosses to religious leaders to politicians – they are subjected to frequent disempowerment.

When you start to practice mindfulness – conscious awareness, in the now, of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions – you become empowered. That’s because your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions are the only things you truly have control of.

Mindfulness of this is how you cease to be subconscious. And that makes you aware of our fear-based society.

The antidote for fear is not love, but reason. Reason is how you see that the largely intangible things we’re afraid of have no power over us – unless we allow them that power.

When fear was tangible and protecting us from death – it was a very different animal. Now, though, it tends to be all about fear of suffering. Not that we’re going to die – but that life is going to suck.

When we become consciously aware via mindfulness – we are empowered. When we’re empowered, we can more easily see fear for what it is – particularly the intangible.

Then, we can choose for ourselves to be on the lookout for I didn’t see that coming from a positive – rather than negative – expectation.

I didn’t see that coming

Expectation can be powerful.

Hence, if you expect bad things to happen – they tend to. That’s because consciousness creates reality.

Like the Law of Gravity, the Law of Attraction works whether you believe in it or not. It’s a law of nature that functions no matter what.

Even still, things happen all the time outside our control. Hence why even if you focus on positivity, negativity can and will occur.

To be blunt – shit happens. I can be the best-damned driver on the road. Yet when someone swings hard right to make a left turn at the edge of my blindspot, we’ll likely have a car accident on our hands.

Clearly, I didn’t see that coming – and it sucked. But now it’s on me to decide what to do with this.

If I expect to always be in danger, constantly be threatened, and life to be an endless struggle – that’s going to be my life experience. The Law of Attraction does its work just like the Law of Gravity keeps my feet on the ground.

It’s far easier to handle these negative occurrences when you are more mindful. That’s because, rather than be on autopilot and at the whims of this, that, or the other thing – you’re in control.

This is why it’s also possible that “I didn’t see that coming” can be something amazing.

I am in the middle of such an experience. I’m going to be vague about this for multiple reasons. A situation I approached from necessity – that I didn’t really desire to have to do – took an unexpected turn. Instead of slogging through with something I had no interest in doing, I have an unplanned-for opportunity before me that I am super-excited about.

And no – I didn’t see that coming.

i didn't see that coming
Photo by David Clode on Unsplash

Positivity vs toxic positivity

Would I be here if I had been focused on negativity instead of seeking positivity? I doubt it. I’ve been working to bring more good into my life via mindfulness – and this unexpected happening looks damned good.

BUT – and this is important – I have not been working with mindfulness and positivity to the exclusion of negativity.

Approaching life from a more positive place is not at all about neglecting, denying, or even avoiding negativity. That’s because negativity is utterly unavoidable. It can and will occur – because life is a paradox. There are two sides to every coin.

Toxic positivity is all about erasing bad things and negativity. Which you can’t. That’s impractical and unrealistic. Positivity is the yin that recognizes the yang of negativity.

But where I put my attention and intention is wholly on me. If I expect the unexpected to be crap and bad – that’s what I’m most likely to get. Whereas if I work from a more positive place, I am more likely to experience good.

But realistically – even a stopped clock is right twice a day. Negative people have good things happen while positive people experience bad things. But where you choose to stand – in the plus or the minus – you choose.

When I didn’t see that coming is from a positive place – whatever “that” is becomes more manageable, for good or ill. And that is utterly worthwhile to me.

Everyone experiences “I didn’t see that coming” moments

Choosing if we approach life from positivity or negativity isn’t hard. It begins with mindfulness of our thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions.

Knowing that you control your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions, you can choose to focus on attracting positivity into your life so that when “I didn’t see that coming” occurs – good or bad – you can handle it. When you work from mindfulness and choose to seek reason and good over fear and bad, that ultimately empowers you.

When you are empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that gets reflected and spreads to other people. This creates a feedback loop of awareness and positivity – a feedback loop everyone can take part in.

Then, together, we build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That becomes the impetus to improve numerous aspects of our lives for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of any current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of pure positivity. That positivity can generate even greater positive energies – and that is ultimately empowering for all.

Everyone is worthy and deserving of all the good we desire. 


This is the three-hundred and ninety-ninth entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

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