How Do I Change How I am Feeling?
To change anything in life, changing what I am feeling is the key.
Conscious reality creation requires thought to begin, feeling to fuel the flames, and intentional action to ignite them. For me, altering feeling is the toughest part of this.
Last week I got to see Jen Sincero, author of You Are a Badass, speak. Like her books, she was an inspiring speaker. Unlike many of the other authors I have read or listened to, she manages to really speak to me and how I approach the manifestation process.
She inspired me, in her talk, to really change my inner dialogue. So for almost a week, now, I have been working to change the conversation in my head. As I mentioned in last week’s Crossing the Bridges post, I realized that I need to not just cease the negative self-talk, but replace it with something more powerful.
This is the thought portion of conscious reality creation. So I am replacing the long-standing self-talk in my head from I don’t have enough money; I am old; My joints are sore and stiff; I’m fat; I am broken; I don’t know how that can be done – to – money is flowing to me; I’m young; my joints are flexible and strong; I am in shape; I’m solid; I know a way will be found.
Powerful redirection, right? I have been, in addition to my previous Mantra of Mightiness, which came from an online Jen Sincero course, repeating this many times a day. I have printed it out, written it out, and read it and recite portions of it daily. The more I take it in, the better I will be at making it so.
The problem I am encountering now is in what I am feeling.
Feeling is fuel to manifestation
I know several people who are deeply feeling. They feel first, and are far more emotional than they are logical. For me, feeling is where I face the biggest challenge.
It is important that I make this statement right off the bat. I do not blame my parents, my therapists, or anyone else for this. Blaming anyone serves no purpose whatsoever. That said, after my parents’ divorce almost forty years ago, I emotionally shut down.
In my thirties I saw the best therapist I ever had the privilege to work with. Together, for the first time, we realized I had done this. Because I was a clever kid, I knew what to tell my therapists at the time, so they failed to recognize I’d shut myself down emotionally. So there I was, in my thirties, for the first time opening myself to emotions I had shunted away for some time.
Today I don’t just understand the feelings, I can feel them. However, changing what I am feeling, at my core, remains particularly challenging.
I know that in addition to saying money is flowing to me; I am young; my joints are flexible and strong; I’m in shape; I am solid; I know a way will be found, I need to FEEL it. When I can feel it, I can manifest it. This is the part I find terribly vexing.
Deep, deep down, I feel…trepidation. Faint anxiety. Dis-ease. When I meditate I can almost get ahold of this…but not for very long. Yet I know, in order to consciously create reality, feeling this is the key.
What am I feeling?
I know, intellectually, when I look at my bills and my bank account, when I feel bad about it, and get concerned over how I can possibly take care of everything I need to, I sabotage the thought of money is flowing to me. Pretty words, but without feeling behind them, they are powerless.
Why am I having such a difficult time feeling this? Repeating over and over again that money is flowing to me, or simply money flows to me changes the inner dialogue, and like the elements hammering away at stone, in time it will break through and change my reality.
Probably not helping that I see this as the same process as forming a canyon. That’s a very, very, very slow process to relate to. This right here might be where I keep sabotaging my desire to manifest better.
I have to not just think and say money comes easily and frequently, I have to FEEL it. In my bones. At my core. Deep, deep down. In feeling it, consciousness creates reality, and I empower the Universe to manifest it.
I know it. I understand it. So…how do I feel it?
Shift the dialogue to feeling
Rather than just saying money is flowing to me; I am young; my joints are flexible and strong; I am in shape; I’m solid; I know a way will be found – I need to adjust this to address the real issue underlying it all. I feel money flowing to me; I’m feeling young; I feel that my joints are flexible and strong; I feel in shape; I’m feeling solid; I feel that a way will be found. Meditating on this, when I made this ever-so-slight change to the dialogue, I felt the energy shift.
It is not enough to alter my self-talk. I need to be more specific. The primary reason to recognize this for what it is, when all is said and done, is because anything I am aiming to manifest in my life, the reality I desire to create, FEELS different from this one. In the reality I desire to live, I will feel more empowered. I will be feeling more in control, happier, more content.
As such, I also need to change my Mantra of Mightiness. I feel prosperous and abundant; I am a good person; I’m feeling worthy and I feel deserving of abundance, prosperity, success, wealth and joy; I feel supported and I feel loved.
Evoking emotion may be the key to changing it. This is what I am focusing on now, and we’ll see what this does for changing my path. Raise my vibrational frequency, attract the things I desire. And the intentional action comes of doing this.
I’ll report back to you how this goes.
What are you feeling?
This is the three-hundred thirty-first entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for, and my personal experiences with, walking along the path of life. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.
Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share.
The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.
After more than 6 years of Pathwalking, I have launched a Patreon to garner support for these works, and more.
