Pathwalking 45
What if I choose the wrong path? How will I know if this is the right choice or the wrong choice? What if I should have zigged instead of zagged?
This is an issue that I have seen people constantly grappling with. The idea of “what if”?
“What if” is the questioning of choice. What would have happened if I had turned left instead of right? What if that day I had driven instead of walked? What if while I choose to be with her, I miss a better her? What if I can’t find a decent job? What if…what if…what if?
Hindsight is always twenty-twenty, but constantly turning back and asking “what if” can drive you not only off a chosen path, but it can also trap you in indecision.
All “what ifs” are not bad. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction – that’s science. As such, consequences will be had from any choice. Consequence often has negative connotations. But life is about choices, and choice is seldom, if ever, singular. There is always an opposite – even when that opposite is not choosing at all. Choices will lead to consequential things.
Asking “what if” prior to moving your feet on the path does have a certain wisdom, depending on the path, and how it will affect you and those around you. As an occasional question, in especial prior to setting out on a path, “what if” serves a useful purpose. But it becomes detrimental if the question becomes attached to every decision in a way that keeps you second-guessing every choice and decision you make.
I concede that you have to ask what your actions will bring you. If you do not ask, how will you know it you are making an informed choice? The problem that can develop is in second-guessing your choices, asking continuously “what if”, and ending your action and forward momentum.
What if I did this? What if I did that? What if I moved this way? What if I moved that way? What if? What if? What if?
And thus you find you are now in opposition to Pathwalking. You are not only no longer moving along the path. To all intents and purposes, you are standing in place, spinning round and round. Sure it seems as if you are in motion, but truth be told it is motion the does not move you along any path at all.
It is far too easy to get caught in this literal cycle. In especial if you are an analytical person. It is also problematic if you have a tendency to be wishy washy or indecisive. And second guessing one’s actions is often another manifestation of fear. Fear of movement, fear or change, fear of making a mistake, fear of getting where you want to get to.
I think it is virtually impossible to NOT ask “what if”. The solution, though, lies in the answer. And, in this type of “what iffing” here, actually having an answer to the question.
That, for me, has often been where the “what if” questioning stems from. I either do not HAVE a cogent answer, or I am too afraid to fail or too afraid to succeed (or both) to choose an answer. Or, in the case of multiple answers, to choose one for fear of choosing wrong.
Which brings us to the key to how to deal with this. You cannot dwell on the “what if”. When it does arise, best to either choose an answer, or ignore the question altogether.
Sure, I could ask myself over and over again ‘what if what if what if’? But if I just go with it, and let my decision carry through, there will be an answer.
This is the crux of it. Rather than questioning your decision, “what iffing” the choice you have made…just push forward. Push past the doubt and the fear and the uncertainty that are disguising themselves as the simplistic “what if”…and let your journey happen.
Pathwalking is about choice. Pathwalking is about decision. Pathwalking is about conscious action. “What if”, at the beginning, is a good question to ponder…but letting the question stop you on your way is a danger to be aware of. And once you are past it, you may find that you have gotten better at decision making by taking conscious action, and “what if” will seldom plague you again.
What if Pathwalking is the action you’ve always waited to take in your life?
This is the forty-fifth entry in my series. These weekly posts are specifically about walking along the path of life, and my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Thank you for joining me.
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