Pathwalking 150
When you are traveling upon your path, you should do so with confidence.
Confidence is not just applicable to emotion, but also to thought and action. You can think, feel and act confident, and it is important to recognize the subtle differences between these three forces.
This is a complex concept, in especial as it’s not simply emotional, intellectual, or physical, but covers all three of these fundamentals.
For people who have issues with self esteem, this a particularly difficult notion to content with. Self esteem and confidence are very much tied together.
What IS confidence? Dictionary.com defines it thus:
noun
1. belief in oneself and one’s powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance; assurance: His lack of confidence defeated him.
2. certitude; assurance: He described the situation with such confidence that the audience believed him completely.
Confidence is not just something you hold to yourself, it is projected. When you speak of something you believe in, when you express passion for something, when you know all the facts without a doubt you have confidence.
When you choose a path, it is important to have confidence in your choice. If you are uncertain of your choice, if you are uncomfortable explaining what you are doing – the lack of confidence may become apparent, and it can be more difficult to take the journey.
How do you build confidence? This is an important question I have been struggling with for some time myself. It goes hand in hand with self-esteem, which is also something I’ve contended with. Here are some thoughts on creating confidence.
Action. Believe it or not, this is the easiest way to begin to build confidence. Take action. Straighten your posture. Speak clearly and be decisive. Dress smartly. I am a leader in a civic organization, and while I often feel as though I am in way over my head, I work to not let that show. I dress for success, put on a professional outfit and as such show confidence in what I am doing. This helps me to feel more confident, and when others see me this way it helps me see myself as such.
I do need to add a note of caution here. There is a fine line between confidence and arrogance. It is important that when you are acting in a confident manner, you don’t get cocky. Confidence is dressing smart and carrying yourself with surety, arrogance is being a know-it-all and not allowing for anyone else to have a valid opinion. I think a lot of people who are just trying to show themselves as confident overdo it, and thus come across as arrogant.
Thought. Think confidence. If you are confident that you have a good plan or a wise idea, if you are confident in thinking about the certainness of your path, that goes a long ways towards building confidence. If you think it will fail, if you think you can’t succeed, if you second guess yourself this destroys confidence. Think confidently. Acting confidently, I find, leads to thinking confidently.
This is where you can tell the difference between confidence and arrogance. If your thoughts are confident, but still open to change you’re in the right place. If your thoughts are confident but utterly locked in, you may be on the verge of crossing the line to arrogance. This leads to the last aspect of this:
Feeling. Feel confident. Be certain. Be assertive. Be knowledgeable. Know what you know, and let yourself feel good about yourself. This is where confidence rests. When you think and act confidently it will help you to feel more confident. Unlike a lot of other concepts where feeling comes first, with confidence I have found the feeling often comes last.
When you feel confident, you will find that you can more easily walk any path you choose. You will also be better equipped to handle changes in your path, and to make any necessary adjustments. Confidence also shows other people your faith in yourself.
Once more, I caution you against over-confidence. You will know if you are feeling confident because it will make you feel good. Over-confidence will not make you feel good, it will actually make you feel uncertain and will chip away at your actual confidence. You will also know based on how people are reacting to you if you are coming across as confident or arrogant.
Acting, thinking and feeling confident will help you walk your given path with more clarity and surety. This can be a challenging idea, but it can make everything in your life easier to contend with, good and ill.
Are you confident?
This is the one-hundred fiftieth entry in my series. These weekly posts are specifically about walking along the path of life, and my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Feel free to re-blog and share. Thank you for joining me.
The first fifty-two weeks (Year One) of installments of Pathwalking is available in print and for your Kindle.
Follow me here!
