Normalizing Mental Health Matters
Let’s get real – normalizing mental health matters is the elephant in every room.
What the hell is normal, anyhow?
The answer is far easier than we tend to make it. Normal is what’s right for you.
Yet society has concocted numerous bizarre notions of what normal should be. For example – man and woman marry and produce children; you work a 9-5 job Monday-Friday; hobbies are gender-specific.
Then, it often goes deeper and becomes a lot more insidious. Rather than accept alternative variations of normal, we judge. Why doesn’t that couple produce a child? How do you make money doing that unconventional job? Why is your golf case full of swords? Abnormalities, in the eyes of some.
But that’s not the worst of it. Certain expectations on behalf of large swaths of society about “normal” are destructive. For example – women who aren’t subservient to men are horrid; men who cry and show other emotions are weak; boys who play with dolls and girls who play with trucks are backward. All these notions of “abnormal” are unhealthy and tear the fabric of our society apart.
Because of these standards of normal, we either try to live up to or resist – mental health takes a real beating. When we refuse to address this – or don’t discourage abusers – we create unhealthy situations and turn to solutions that make us sicker, not healthier.
Normalizing mental health matters begins with better acknowledging of them. This begins with you and me.
How is your mental health?
The past year, between a global pandemic and horrific politics, we’ve been bombarded by matters that are impacting our mental health.
I know that some people may be just fine. They’re calm, collected, on an even keel. If you’re there – that’s awesome, keep it up, more power to you!
But for most people I know – there are issues with anxiety, uncertainty, depression, and other matters made even clearer in the stark reality of the disconnect necessary to slow the spread of COVID-19. Zoom fatigue is real, and the touch-sensitive are starving being unable to hug their friends and loved ones.
Because our society is obsessed with projecting “normalcy”, too many people neglect to acknowledge their mental health.
Normalizing mental health matters would change this. And that would be good for us. Sweeping mental health matters under the rugs and ignoring them in the hope they’ll just go away is harming us all. Further, by implying mental health impacts a minority rather than the majority – we damage ourselves further.
I have been battling depression most of my life. I’ve been in and out of therapy and on and off anti-depressants, as such. To further combat this, I practice mindfulness, meditate daily, and take time for breathing to stay balanced.
Many people would be ashamed to admit to what I just shared. That’s why normalizing mental health matters is so important. There is NO shame in admitting you have a problem. Accountability is the key to fixing any problem that you have – tangible or intangible.
The notion that depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues as weakness is total bullshit. Realistically, mental health issues are as common as the air we breathe.
Recognize and disempower the bullies
Sorry to get political, but this is important. We just spent the last 4 years in the United States being led by the schoolyard bully.
The so-called leader of this country used gaslighting, narcissism, and even resorted to name-calling to deride, belittle, and shout down any opposition he encountered. It got to the point where the reasonable among us dreaded what shit he’d be spewing next.
Bullies always have followers. Why? Because they project strength. Trump was all about pointing out the weaknesses of EVERYONE else. And if you crossed him or displeased him, he turned on you, too.
He is not, by any stretch of the imagination, the only bully among our leadership. Look at how many of those people gaslight, drive wedges between people, and bully people to have their way. You see it among politicians, religious leaders, business leaders, and many of their most ardent followers and supporters.
Bullying has been increasingly normalized. And the bullies tend to have people so scared of them that they don’t get called out as they should.
But when they do? Damn, do they fall hard. I give you Harvey Weinstein, for example. A whole movement came of his victims calling him out and encouraging others to call out the bullies and abusers in their lives.
Normalizing mental health matters disempowers the bullies. It encourages calling out the abusers and not allowing them to maintain their so-called power. When you see that the emperor is naked and not in the regal robes he envisions himself to be in – point and call it out. Normalizing mental health matters is the equivalent of this.
Our society won’t do this unless we as individuals do.
Normalizing mental health matters and mindfulness
EVERYBODY has mental health matters to contend with from time to time. Nobody is immune. And I mean NOBODY.
Do you know why bullies and gaslighters are the way they are? Because they are massively insecure, uncertain, and scared. Lashing out and creating false narratives to disempower makes them feel like they have control. Which is utter and total bullshit.
There is nobody in your head but you. More specifically, you, and you alone, think, feel, and act for you. All that you think and feel is within your control – when you practice mindfulness.
It’s become a buzzword. Mindfulness, the grand and glorious notion, is shared by Eastern philosophers and psychologists. In the quick-fix instant gratification culture we live in, mindfulness is tossed around like a baseball in a game of catch.
At its core, though, mindfulness is simple. It’s awareness of yourself. It’s consciousness of the environment you are in mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, Being aware of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions makes you conscious of your inner being – your mindset/headspace/psyche. All that goes into who you are.
That conscious awareness puts you in the driver’s seat.
But only you can choose to start the car and take it for a ride. If you don’t know how to drive you might need help. And it’s okay to get help when you need it.
Normalizing mental health matters belonging to you begins normalizing them in the collective consciousness.
Getting help and helping yourself
Let’s address a major false narrative going around. You are not weak for admitting when you need help. And that’s another of the aspects of normalizing mental health matters.
Help could just be talking to a friend; it could be seeing a therapist; it might involve taking anti-depression, anti-anxiety, and like drugs – or a combination of any and all of these.
While I meditate 20 minutes a day, write about my processes and journey, and work on conscious reality creation, mindfulness, and positivity – I turn to others for help, too.
Some are abstract – I read a lot. I’ve come across some amazing notions from various authors that have helped me. Others are direct – talking to friends and family and discussing issues as I face them. And I am not averse to getting therapy if I cannot find balance for my mental health on my own.
It is all too easy to be disempowered by our society. Hell, many of our so-called leaders prefer that you be powerless. But you are empowered to make choices and decisions for how your life is. For some there are literal struggles, for others they’re more figurative, and for some, it’s both. But you are the only one who knows what and who you are – and what you desire your life to be.
Normalizing mental health matters individually is the first step to normalizing them further. We need to share our challenges not for sympathy – but for mutual strength. Struggling with mental health matters is lonely as all get-out. But believe me – you are very much not alone.
Let’s get real – normalizing mental health matters is the elephant in every room. Let’s stop ignoring them and work together to normalize them for the benefit of all.
What mental health matters have you struggled with/are you struggling with?
This is the four-hundred and seventy-sixth exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.
I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Additionally, I desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.
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