If You’re Feeling Alone, You’re Never As Alone As You Might Fear
Feeling alone is unpleasant – but what if you’re never truly alone?
You are never alone. Why? Because you always have yourself.
Ok, before you quit reading, let me further explain. Whether you engage it consciously or not, you have an inner dialogue. Consciously or subconsciously, it’s running in the background of your life, no matter what you’re doing.
Inside your subconscious mind are numerous beliefs, values, and habits. Some have been there more or less all your life. Others have been formed and created by your environment, life experiences, education, associations, and whatever else you’ve been exposed to or engaged with.
Most of the time, it just is. Your subconscious is just that – subconscious and passive. It’s akin to the OS on your phone, tablet, or computer. Similarly, you can only engage it when you actively, consciously do so.
When you choose to look into and engage your subconscious, you’re likely to find the source of most of what makes you feel lonely. Because despite the many messages that loneliness and alone are products of the world outside of you – they originate within you.
Who are you, really?
When you look in the mirror, who do you see? Is the person in the mirror who you are?
Not even close. The person in the mirror is barely a fraction of the person within. And I am not writing about internal organs and the like – this is about your mind, heart, and soul. The thinking, feeling, intending, engaging person that is at your core and is your inner being.
It doesn’t matter who you are, where you come from, or anything else – this is the truth for everyone. You and everyone else on the planet are not the person in the mirror – but the person deep beneath the surface, made of energy and indestructible.
So what? So, most of the reason we tend to be lonely and feel alone is because of messages from movies, TV, games, books, and other outside sources. Messages that if you don’t have a close friend, close family, lovers, a pet, friendly coworkers, sentimental objects, and numerous other external bits and pieces – you’re disconnected and alone.
That’s all advertising is, really. Buy this product or that service, and you will attract people to your awesomeness and never be alone. But you’ll be even less alone when you buy the $45k car instead of the more fuel-efficient and practical $20k car.
Everywhere you turn, there are messages that the only way to not be lonely is to fill your life with people and things. Look outside of yourself for the answers.
But the truth is that feeling alone begins within.
What and how you feel is valid no matter what it is. Rational or not, nobody but you can be the true judge of that. The only person in your head, heart, and soul is you.
This is why you are the only one who can know who you truly are – and it’s far, far deeper than the reflection in the mirror.
The ego is closer – but still not who you truly are
Ego is both how you project yourself to the outside world and reflect back into yourself, too.
But ego is not your conscious self. It’s a bridge between your conscious and subconscious. As such, it’s a construct and often comprised of beliefs, values, and ideas that aren’t entirely who you are or desire to be.
This is important to understand and acknowledge because it’s easy to believe that your egoic self is your true self. But it’s not. It’s another construct. And a large part of its nature is to protect you from change.
Hence, its message is often all about how you are or will be alone if you change.
That’s not the truth, though.
Knowing who you are, you’re not alone
Feeling lonely and alone is natural. Part of that is because humans are social creatures. You desire to make connections, friendly, intimate, or whatever.
But connections between you and other people are fleeting. They’re not ever going to feel complete because they can’t be. Why? Because you can’t get into anyone else’s head, heart, or soul. Just like nobody else can get into yours, either.
But you always have a deeper sense of self than you consciously are connected to. And when you practice mindfulness, and are consciously aware – here and now – of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions – you gain greater self-awareness.
That opens you to better knowing who you are, at your deepest core.
BUT – and this is important – you are not all the beliefs, values, and habits in your subconscious. Not if they have ceased to serve you. By working on mindfulness, you open the way to see into your subconscious – and initiate changes and alterations if needs be.
When you dig deeper into yourself and find yourself more thoroughly, you make a connection that lessens loneliness – and feeling alone. Because you always have yourself.
When you are more aware of yourself on this level, you’ll feel less alone. Because that is a connection to your constant spiritual, invisible, truest energetic being.
And that is who you genuinely, really truly, are.
Alone is valid, but…
There are certainly times when you are and will be alone. And that feeling, and the gnawing discomfort that comes with it, is utterly valid.
However – remaining with that feeling, like any feeling, is a choice. And it starts from within. This is why getting to know yourself and how you’re never alone is empowering and helpful in this matter.
The what and how of feelings are often triggered by events, random happenstance, the unexpected, and other factors outside your control. The visceral, immediate, animal reaction therein isn’t to be rationed with nor made logic of in the moment. But, after a time – and that’s variable from person to person – you can choose to change the feeling.
Mindfulness is the key to this. When you ask, here and now, what you’re thinking, what and how you’re feeling, what your intentions are, and why you’re taking or not taking action, you become consciously aware. That conscious awareness opens you to change any of these elements of mindfulness.
You always have yourself and are never truly alone. But what’s more – sometimes alone is good and healthy. Because there are certainly times being with and by yourself is the best way to grow, change, and be empowered. It’s how you can find and/or choose new paths in life so that you can live it to the fullest.
I won’t lie to you. This might read as utter hooky-spooky bullshit, and it’s not subject to a quick fix. But when you learn that you’re never really alone – because you always have yourself – tons of potential and possibilities will present themselves to you. If you choose to allow them.
Can you see how you are never truly alone?
This is the five-hundred and seventy-first exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – using mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.
I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.
Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.
The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.
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