Appreciation Always Appreciates
Given or received, appreciation goes a long way.
This past weekend, I received recognition for certain things I do in my medieval reenactment society. The words of appreciation that went with that recognition got me thinking about how appreciation always appreciates.
The recognition I received was for two things. First, for the work I do in teaching others how to do medieval rapier combat (fencing). As a student of the arte of defense, I also love teaching new people fencing while working to increase and improve my skills. Receiving recognition for the work I do means a lot to me.
The second recognition I got was for words I create for awards given out to other people. One of the cool things about the medieval reenactment group I play with is that awards often come with artistic, beautifully calligraphed and illuminated scrolls. For these, I sometimes write the words, and that was the work I do that got rewarded this weekend.
Appreciation appreciates because given or received, it feels good. Appreciation is a form of gratitude, and genuine gratitude is always empowering. There is, however, a false equivalency to appreciation that needs to be recognized. That’s praise. It’s important to distinguish between appreciation and praise and how they differ.
Praise is not the same as appreciation
One of the biggest failings of Donald Trump is his incessant, obsessive need for praise. He wants to be praised as the biggest dicked, wisest, strongest, most wonderful leader the world has ever produced. That’s why he will put his name on anything and everything, so that the people will sing his praises.
I would argue, however, that what he actually desires is appreciation. Why? Because appreciation is tied directly to gratitude, and gratitude always feels good, whether given or received. What’s more, appreciation given as thanks is genuine, whereas praise can be utterly false.
There are lots of examples of false praise given to stir the masses and influence people, to make an ideology appear truer or more prominent, and to create division. Appreciation, however, doesn’t do that. That’s because you can’t appreciate something falsely.
Why? Because false appreciation turns into envy or is exposed by sarcasm. Appreciation, like gratitude, can’t be faked to any effect. When it’s faked, it stands out, and the tone makes it pretty obvious.
Praise also tends to be a one-way street. The person giving praise seldom receives the benefit that the person praised gets. Appreciation, on the other hand, feels good when you give it. It’s also seldom about a person and an action as much as it’s about attitude and approach.
Attitude and approach
Do I take the time to teach new people fencing for some sort of self-aggrandizement? Nope. I do it because I love helping more people understand this incredible, unique martial art. There is nothing that lights me up more than that “Ah-hah!” moment when the drills and why we do them click in combat. I teach fencing because I love sharing what I learn as much as I love learning it myself.
Likewise, I don’t write the words for scrolls to show off. Hell, the words I write are usually about appreciation for the thing a person did that is being rewarded. I do it because I love taking words and making them tell stories, inspire, encourage, and expand potential and possibilities. Hell, I ended the sometimes-money-making cross-postings of my blogs to Medium, but I am still sharing these ideas because I love to write and share.
That’s where attitude and approach come into play. Appreciation always appreciates because it’s bigger than the praise of one person or ideal. Instead, appreciation is gratitude, and gratitude is always empowering.
Power ebbs and flows. Most power is utterly artificial. Empowerment, which is your personal skill, ability, and belief in yourself, is not. You are empowered by you. Appreciation helps you see and feel this for what it is.
Everyone desires to feel appreciated. But not everyone knows how to give and get it. What’s more, our society tends to be uncomfortable with appreciation in part because of its often confusing relation to praise.
Walking the line
Praise can be helpful when someone does a good job. But more powerful, and more empowering, is gratitude and appreciation.
Which feels more genuine and empowering? “You’re amazing and do great things and make the world a better place,” or “Thank you for helping and teaching and sharing.” The former rings a bit hollow compared to the latter to me.
That’s because praise can be easily faked. Tone changes the first statement. Read this sarcastically – “You’re amazing and do great things and make the world a better place.” That changes it rather a lot, because you can emphasize things in such a way as to be damning rather than praising.
Yes, you can fake appreciation. But it’s obvious right from the start. Yet appreciation raises people up in a way praise doesn’t because it’s as powerful given as received. Praise does nothing for the person giving it. Appreciation gives everyone more reasons to do and be things because of how empowering it is.
Appreciation always appreciates, and that does more good in a world that can always use more good things.
Recognizing how appreciation always appreciates isn’t hard
It’s all about practicing active conscious awareness (mindfulness) of your thoughts, feelings, intentions, and the positivity or negativity of your approach to direct your actions.
When you recognize and acknowledge that you can use your choices and decisions to give and receive appreciation, you can use this form of gratitude to help others feel more worthy and deserving (while feeling it for yourself). Knowing that appreciation always appreciates, you can employ being appreciative to everyone and everything you encounter in any situation and help change the narrative to a more grateful, kind, and compassionate one overall.
This empowers you, and your empowerment can empower others around you.
Consciously choosing your approach to life towards positivity or negativity — from the vast cylinder that exists between them — shifts life in a way that opens greater dialogue. From that dialogue, you can recognize, explore, and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.
Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself opens the way for a positive approach and attitude via your actions. This can lead to realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.
The better aware you are of yourself, here and now, the better you can choose and decide what, how, and why your life experiences will be. When you empower yourself, it can spread to those around you and empower them as well. That is an amazing conduit to help reason to overcome fear in the collective consciousness.
Thank you for coming along on this journey.
This is the six-hundred-eighteenth (618) entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, reblog, and spread the positivity.
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