Your Path Only Needs to Make Sense to You
After all, you’re the only one who can walk it.
I’ve never been exactly normal. Nope. Over the years, I’ve made choices and decisions that have caused some of my friends and family to wonder what is going through my head.
Hell, to be honest, there have been plenty of times I’ve questioned that. Probably part of why I’ve been in and out of therapy for most of my life. But the truth is, I never belonged on the paths others set for me.
What does that mean? It means that the expectations of others for what my life should look like have seldom resonated with me. Lots of normal career paths like doctor, lawyer, or businessperson never fit. Yet I still tried to work the 9-to-5 life, even after getting a degree that was utterly not that.
It took me a long time to recognize that my path only made sense to me. What lights me up, sparks my imagination and creativity is utterly unique to me. But even after that recognition, it took a while to acknowledge it.
Acknowledging that my path was unique to me, and only made sense to me, opened the door to let me begin truly walking it. Still, it’s not without its obstacles, blockages, challenges, and issues. But my life has been pretty amazing since I started truly practicing mindfulness.
This is not just true for me. It’s also true for you. Your path only needs to make sense to you.
You alone live your life experience
The only person in your head, heart, and soul (mind, body, and spirit) is YOU. You, and you alone, experience and perceive your world. At times, you might let people in to one degree or another. But they can’t truly be in there with you; just as you can’t get inside anyone else’s head, heart, or soul.
That’s one of the main reasons why your path only needs to make sense to you, and you alone. Nobody else thinks, feels, intends, chooses approaches, or acts for you. All choices and decisions are ultimately made by you, even though they might be swayed or influenced by others.
Nobody else knows how you think, how you experience your feelings, what your intentions are, the positivity or negativity of your approach, and the actions you do or don’t take. Only you have the power of this. And it’s more than power; it’s empowerment.
You make choices and decisions all the time, but some feel insignificant, automated, and unimportant. But every choice and decision made is significant. That/s because they strengthen your muscles to take the wheel and drive your life.
Circumstances can and will impact who, what, where, how, and why you are. Some are easier than others to change. But in the end, when all is said and done, your path belongs to you alone, and it doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else.
Maneuvering through the world on your path
Unless you’re living the hermit life, in a cave utterly separate from the world, you interact with people. Many are nameless and faceless, driving in cars on the highway, standing in lines at the store, walking past you on a busy city street, and so on. Yet all of them, like you, are the only ones in their own heads, hearts, and souls.
You are one of 8 billion people on Planet Earth. All 8,000,000,000 people have their own unique viewpoint on life, the Universe, and everything. Every single one of us has our own paths in life, too.
Many people are in unfortunate circumstances. For them, there are artificial limitations on their paths that they can’t fully overcome without lots of work. Still, no matter who you are or where you come from, you are wired to make choices and decisions about your life experience.
No matter who you are, you’re worthy and deserve to have choices available. But all choices come with impacts and/or consequences. Most are no big deal with minimal import, like choosing what to eat or what tooth to start brushing in the morning. Yet even these can be consequential, like when your choice of meal gives you food poisoning or that tooth you choose to brush sends shooting pain through your jaw.
Still, making choices and decisions via active conscious awareness puts you in control (the limited control you have), and that’s worthwhile. But not everyone will understand your path, nor be able to make sense of it.
Some people will be well-meaning when it comes to their lack of understanding. Others might have their own motivations, or might be reacting to expectations of society and expected norms. Knowing this, you can be prepared to handle this when it comes up.
It’s not selfish to choose and walk your path
One of the biggest issues with choosing your path in life is the impact doing so can have on others. Especially when you make choices and decisions different from those you made before.
Setting boundaries and saying no when you previously had none and said yes will throw people off. They might react poorly and might call you selfish.
Selfishness is not self-care and putting yourself first. It involves malice of forethought, knowingly doing something that you’re aware will cause hurt or harm to others. It’s not saying no to helping that person who never shows gratitude or makes you feel bad if you don’t do as they expect. Selfishness is taking more than your fair share and knowingly leaving less or nothing for anyone else.
Your path is not for anyone other than you, and because of that, it might only make sense to you. For example, being a storyteller and writer of fiction, there are people and places in my head that exist nowhere else – unless I put them on the page or screen. Nobody but me understands why and how I’m compelled to walk this creative path. Yet I do, even though nobody but me fully understands that.
I deal with naysayers, people who mean well but question me, and my own doubts. Yet I know this is my path, and so I’m continuing to walk it. And I’m glad I do, because I love what my life looks like and enjoy all the potential and possibilities, even when shit goes wrong and I have to contend with that.
Nothing is perfect
Your path will not be easy. There will be challenges, obstacles, random happenings that make you question if you should go on or change to something else. Chances are, you’ll sometimes question if you should just live life you’re expected to, and/or follow the societal norms and standards.
This is normal. It’s how the Universe works for everyone, everywhere. Perfection, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. What looks perfect to me might look totally fucked up to you. Why? Because our perceptions of life, the Universe, and everything are unique to each of us. That’s why your path might only make sense to you.
If there were only One True Way, one standard, and no variation, this world would be a very different place. Sure, it might be nice if disagreements could be less violent, but I believe a lot of that stems from people not being able to conceive of, let alone choose, their paths in life. Helplessness tends to lead to lashing out. Welcome to the human condition.
No path is perfect. Nothing is perfect. And that’s okay. Why? Because it means there is always room for growth and change. Your path, when you walk it, is all about making choices and decisions to drive it however you see fit. And you’re worthy and deserving of that, even if nobody else can make sense of it.
How do you apply mindfulness to make consciously aware choices and decisions for your life experience?
Can you see that it’s okay if you alone can make sense of that?
This is the seventh-hundred-seventy-fifth (775) exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – applying mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.
I share my philosophy because I desire to make a difference in the world and help as many people as I can to find their empowerment with conscious reality creation.
Thank you for joining me. Feel free to share and/or repost where it might do good for you and others.
The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.
Also, please check out my author website for the rest of my published fiction and nonfiction works.
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