Is It Possible That I’m Wrong About Positivity Empowering People?
Yes, I might be wrong about positivity empowering people. If I am, I’m open to learning how and why.
One Monday morning, in February 2014, I logged into Facebook.
I was immediately bombarded by similar messages. Today is going to suck. I hate Mondays. What fresh fuckery will I deal with this week? Back to the terrible grind. And similar negative messages.
Wow, I thought. So much negativity. I wonder what I can do about that?
Thus began my Monday positivity posts. For almost 8 years, I’ve shared thoughts, ideas, notions, and processes for finding, creating, generating, and experiencing more positivity in our lives.
Along the way, I have battled the impressions of those who see anything related to ideas of positivity as toxic positivity.
What is toxic positivity? It’s the idea that positivity can erase, negate, and eliminate negativity. Positivity gets used to deny, disregard, and put blinders on regarding negativity. It’s toxic because that’s not how life works.
Negativity will always be. Period. And that’s good, frankly. We need the yin and yang of negativity and positivity.
After 8 years, do I think working on finding, creating, and sharing positivity made a difference? Yes. I know that focusing on positivity has put me in a better headspace overall.
However – I acknowledge that maybe I am wrong about positivity. Perhaps my idea that it is so empowering is incorrect.
I am open to that possibility.
Evidence reinforcing my confidence in this belief
I don’t just preach this idea without some evidence that positivity empowers and is good for us.
Let’s start here. Like attracts like – whether you believe in the law of attraction or not. Thus, if you are feeling down, talking about it, sharing negative posts on social media – you will find more things to bring you down.
This isn’t an abstract notion. From personal experience, when I feel down and focus on that – I find more things to make me feel down. If I’m unhappy, sad, lonely, frustrated, or similarly negative, unless I choose to address this and seek the opposite of those feelings – I’ll find more of them.
Conversely – if I’m feeling good, in a positive headspace, and put my focus into finding and/or creating more – I tend to find more good things to enjoy.
No, it does not always work that way. Just because I am feeling positive doesn’t mean that bad news won’t bring me down. Nor that I can ignore or disregard bad things. That is toxic positivity and how it works.
The other evidence I can present comes from what others have shared with me. That’s the occasional appreciation for sharing these ideas and being told how it positively impacts other people.
This is why I’m reasonably confident that positivity empowers. But I am still open to evidence to the contrary.
I can see how I might be wrong about positivity
Overall, I do my damndest to look at this and other debates with an open mind. I’m open to being shown my bias makes me incorrect, and that my values and beliefs need adjustment.
There are one or two things that no amount of “evidence” to the contrary will sway me from. For example, you will never convince me that equality for all, love in its purest form, kindness, or compassion are in any way bad, cause weakness, or are detrimental for the world. I can’t see in any way how their opposites improve matters for the world overall.
But when it comes to the argument that I make for positivity empowering – I can see reasonable discussion to the contrary.
For example – some people believe that negativity causes growth. Destruction, chaos, and lack produce energy for making new things. Incredible works of art and culture have come into being from depression, sadness, anger, and the like. Negativity spurs action.
Maybe that’s true. I, however, am yet to be convinced. The negative thing might be the impetus, sure – but the action is born of seeking to find better. And that’s empowerment that, to me, represents a positive spin.
Again, I’m open to being proven wrong. I’ll accept any evidence to show me this. That’s how we grow, evolve, and take charge of change after all. I know that for all I know there is far more that I don’t know.
But I believe, from my experience and practice, that positivity is an aspect of recognizing and embracing working with change.
Empowerment gives us control
Why do I feel like I do about positivity? Because I believe that empowerment makes us all better.
When you are empowered, you become more capable of thinking, feeling, and acting for your best self. It opens you to mindfulness and assuming control of yourself and your life experience.
Lots of people just live by rote and routine. They take whatever life throws their way and accept that they are the plaything of fate, the Powers-that-Be, or whatever. Then, they complain about various matters, wait for someone else to show them the way – and accept and pass blame around.
That’s a generalization, I know. But I’ve seen it too many times to disprove it. And many of the negatives I saw that Monday morning – which inspired my weekly positivity posts – were along that line. People believed it was all out of their control and not within their power.
We have all the power. No, that doesn’t give us control over other people or life situations. But it does let us be mindful and take control of what we’re thinking, what and how we’re feeling, the actions we take, and our intentions behind them.
That’s empowerment. It cannot and does not impact anyone else. That’s not how it works. And it’s not selfish to use our power of empowerment to better ourselves.
Why isn’t it selfish? Because if we don’t choose to take control over our lives, we’re disempowering ourselves. Then, we are the playthings of fate, the Universe, the Powers-that-Be, God, and the like.
I prefer being empowered and choosing for myself.
I acknowledge that I might be wrong about positivity empowering. It’s possible. But as positivity only does harm when toxic – I’ll keep spreading this message.
Recognizing that I might be wrong about positivity isn’t hard
It begins with mindfulness of thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions.
Knowing that I might be wrong, I am open to being shown evidence of this and learning otherwise. When we are open to the idea that what we believe and value could be incorrect – we are open to change and working with it. And that ultimately empowers us.
When you are empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that gets reflected and spreads to other people. This creates a feedback loop of awareness and positivity that everyone can take part in.
Together, we build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That becomes the impetus to improve our lives for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of any current situation, and generate even more positivity and gratitude.
An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of pure positivity. That positivity can generate even greater positive energies – and that is ultimately empowering for all. Because everyone is worthy and deserving of all the good we desire.
This is the four hundred and fifteenth entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.
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