Reason and Reasonable Are Not the Same
Knowing the difference between reason and reasonable can smooth-over any path you choose.
We live in a fear-based society. Everywhere you turn fear is used to prevent growth, create artificial limitations, stifle creativity, and disempower the masses while keeping a select few “in power.”
If you don’t believe me, just look at the GOP here in the United States. The vast majority of their party line is how the “other” – be it liberal, immigrant, black person, woman, LGBTQ person, or what-have-you – will take what is yours and screw you over. “They” have it in for you – and you should be afraid.
The Democrats also employ fear in their party line. But mostly it’s based on the clear-and-present danger represented by the willingness of the other side to subvert, disregard, and overthrown the democratic process for their own enlargement. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t still get abused by them, too.
And fear permeates from the big-picture matters like politics to personal matters. There are expectations for how to live well in our culture that, if disregarded, you should be afraid of. Instead of encouragement for the effort to expand it’s often met with concern and discouragement.
Fear is virtually everywhere you turn. But its opposite is reason. Particularly when the fear is intangible and based on lack, scarcity, or some other artifice rather than imminent danger or death.
Sometimes, to practice reason over fear, you have to be unreasonable. Or rather, you need to do something that may appear unreasonable to some while being perfectly reasonable to and for you.
Being unreasonable in the face of the expected
Despite changes in the fabric of our society over the years that have accepted women in the workplace, single-parent families, LGBTQA+ families, and the like – expectations of normalcy still exist.
Far too many people hold onto the idea that a family is a husband, wife, and a kid or two. You work a normal 9-5 job to make enough money to buy the house and the cars and live for the weekend. All else is unreasonable to those people.
This has been weaponized, particularly since the Reagan years in the United States, and a focus on “family values” that – frequently – lacks any basis in reality. Anything that doesn’t match this ideal is suspect and seen as unreasonable.
But anyone who has invented something useful, written an amazing novel, painted a masterpiece, or otherwise impacted the world did so from a place where they rejected “reasonable”. They fought to be who they were, create what they were creating, and pursued the reality they believed in.
Henry Ford saw an impossible V8 engine, and despite more than a year of failure had his engineers hold to it until it became reality. Nikola Tesla pushed alternating current as the power source of the world over direct current – and that’s how our homes are powered. Both these men of note in their time were seen as unreasonable. Today, we see them as visionaries instead.
Being unreasonable in the face of the expected is often necessary to consciously create reality and to change your life for the better. That can -and will – lead to stepping outside of your comfort zone. Which means you will need to face your fears.
That’s a matter of practicing reason.
Using reason to overcome fear
When humankind was primitive, living as hunter-gatherers, fear kept us alive. Fear made us avoid the predators that would use us as a source of food.
Today, this sort of fear is reflected in soldiers at war, being held at gunpoint in a robbery or carjacking, hanging off a cliff trying not to fall to your death and the like. Fear for your survival – and its ability to keep you alive – is tangible, relevant, and useful to you.
Fear of the intangible tends to be made-up. It’s not life-threatening, nor necessarily life-changing. Frequently, the fear we are presented with is more about fear of suffering.
We love our comfort zones. Human beings strive to be comfortable overall. That’s not a bad thing, except for when you get comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. Being in a relationship that makes you miserable, holding a job you hate, living somewhere you despise, and the like.
But change, for many, is terrifying. The devil you know is safe. Or so you think. Reason and reasonable can be in conflict.
What if you choose to step out of your comfort zone? What if you determine you have desires you wish to pursue to consciously create the reality you believe you are worthy and deserving of? You will probably have fears to overcome to do this.
The best way to overcome fear is by practicing reason. Reason is using logic and mindfulness to analyze the situation and see if the fear itself is the threat – or the suffering that will come to pass as a result of what you fear is.
Examples of reason overcoming fear
Let’s say you are interested in asking that person out. But you’re terrified of rejection if they say no. The fear of rejection and the suffering it may cause stays your hand.
But reason says that if you don’t ask them out, you’ll never know – and miss out. And if they say no, you may be disappointed – but you have an answer.
Perhaps you believe you deserve a promotion at your job. But you’re afraid that you will be rejected, or shamed, or told you’re no good, or worst-case scenario – fired for asking. You might build it up to the point of a panic attack (which I’ve seen happen).
But reason says that if you don’t ask for the promotion you will stay where you are. You won’t advance, and you might not come to the attention of those in power who can advance your career. Reason also tells you that if they say no, nothing changes. Except you might find it’s time to seek a new and better job. Yes, it might be frustrating and disappointing – but you know where you stand.
And even IF you get fired – then it was only a matter of time before that happened anyhow. Reason says that you asking for a promotion and getting fired for asking, got you there sooner rather than later – because clearly, it would have happened anyhow.
The point is that the fear of suffering is generally worse than the suffering. Reason can and will show this for what it is.
Think back on your life. I have no doubt you have an experience where you expected suffering – and when it didn’t go your way, it was not even close to what you feared. Or it did go your way – and you triumphed.
Reason and reasonable can differ but coexist
Reason is the best way to overcome fear. Being reasonable, however, can keep you small and prevent growth, change, and the manifestation of life as you would desire for it to be.
Stepping out of your comfort zone is often unreasonable. But that’s what it takes to take charge of your life and make it how you desire for it to be. The fear you experience as you do this can be overcome by reason.
Keep in mind, change is inevitable. It’s the one constant in the whole Universe. You will experience change, sometimes slower than a snail’s pace, other times so fast you get whiplash. Whatever the case may be, you can choose to take charge and control or direct change. But it will probably require being unreasonable in the face of cultural expectations – while using reason to face and overcome the fear.
That is how reason and reasonable coexist, despite being different animals. Mindfulness – being consciously aware of the self in the now, makes you more aware of the nature of your fears. Mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions is the door to your inner being and your mindset/headspace/psyche.
That knowledge shows you your fear while letting you make choices and decisions to take control. When you are in control, you are empowered to create your life and live how you desire to. Thus empowered, you can choose the paths you wish to explore.
Knowing the difference between reason and reasonable can smooth-out any path you choose. Reason lets you overcome the fear from the obstacles like being reasonable might create along the way.
You are worthy and deserving of being all that you can be and having a life that you are excited to experience.
What do you fear, and how can you use reason to overcome it?
This is the four-hundred and seventy-seventh exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.
I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Additionally, I desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.
Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.
The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.
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