What I choose is what is best for me.
Nobody but me can choose what I want for my life. Why? Because there is nobody else inside my head.
People question people’s life choices all the time. I don’t know if it’s a schadenfreude thing, or a judgement thing, or something else. We talk about it all the time, and we frequently discuss how we might have chosen differently, or comment about disagreeing with choices that have been made.
It’s important to recognize that nobody can choose for us. Period, end of story. I am the only one who can recognize what’s best for me, and I have to live with the choices I make, and don’t make.
Why do we frequently question other people’s choices? I think sometimes it’s a matter of self-reflection. Other times, it simply feels easier to look at what other people choose, and comment on it, rather than examine our own choices.
Many people are terrible at choosing and deciding about their lives. I am certainly guilty of this myself. Going back over my life, there were numerous times I decided not to decide, or didn’t make a choice because I feared the outcome.
What have I been afraid of? Ultimately, I feared being abandoned, shunned, and rejected by almost everyone. I feared success and failure equally, because I thought either would leave me forsaken by everyone.
I am still struggling with this. While I strive to put on a confident exterior, inside I still fight the demons of my fears. While I could put the blame on my combat with depression, that feels like a cop-out. I have chosen to walk my own path, and though others might question this, I still believe in it.
Choose for you.
Deciding is something that can be scary. Why? Because when we analyze any given choice, it’s possible to see multiple angles and various outcomes. To decide literally means in the Latin it originates from “to cut off.” A decision cuts off many, if not all alternatives, and directs you in one way. In especial when there is more than one choice, knowing if you made the right decision becomes a concern.
Maybe that’s why we question the choices other people make. Perhaps we’ve made a similar choice and got an unsavory outcome. It’s possible that we had a similar choice, and in our own analysis of it saw no good coming of it. Or maybe we had that choice, did not make it, and regret that.
Our society strives to undo that which we dislike. Again, while I hate to get political, let’s look at Congress. Rather than fix the Affordable Care Act in a reasonable way, they keep trying to undo it. Instead of taking forward steps, they are going backwards. Sadly, tons of progress made in the past decade is being undone all because of spite on the part of petty politics.
Anyhow, this is indicative of the state of our society. We want to undo what we dislike, rather than do something different. The Universe does not undo.
Consciousness Creates Reality. I cannot stress this fact enough. We might focus on undoing a thing, but the Universe doesn’t recognize this. I don’t want x or we need to undo y the Universe translates as give me more of x and y. Ever notice how when you focus on something you really do not want, you seem to get an abundance of it? That is conscious reality creation.
Choose what you want to manifest.
You are the only one who can choose what is best for you. Yes, it is almost habitual to comment on the choices other people make, but we can’t change anyone else’s choices. The only person’s choices we effect are our own.
I know that there are people who do not understand what I want to do with my life. Frankly, sometimes I get concerned about what I am choosing. But I know that I am better off making choices and deciding on things for myself than just letting life live me.
I have never taken easy paths, but I have been so afraid of being rejected that I have frequently abandoned them. Didn’t make use of my theatre degree, did not pursue a career in radio, never became a teacher. After a long time, I have decided that I am a writer, and I will make my living doing that.
This is not an easy choice. Working on my own requires me to be better at self-discipline, and making the optimum use of my time. I would prefer not to return to the corporate world, because life is too short to spend most of my day somewhere sucking my soul dry. Certainly if I can find the right environment in this respect, that is an option, however.
Because I alone can choose for me, it is up to me to take necessary actions to manifest the life I want. I believe we live in an abundant universe. As such, there is more than enough of everything I want to consciously create. I am not taking anything from anyone else in doing this, and I am worthy.
FDR said “Only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” When I allow my fear of failure, fear of success, and ultimate fear of rejection to overwhelm reason, it is imperative I keep this in mind. Our fear response is necessary when it comes to the tangible. That’s how we avoid getting eaten by lions and mauled by bulls. But the intangible is immaterial, and is not a fear to concern ourselves with.
I am the only one who can choose what is right for me. Only I can decide to allow intangible fears to get in the way of my choices. It would do us all well to keep that in mind, the next time we question a choice either made by ourselves or made by another, for whatever reason. We can all work together to be better than we are.
What do you choose for your paths?
This is the three-hundred-third entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for, and my personal experiences with, walking along the path of life. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.
Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share.
The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.
If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.