The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: thoughts (Page 1 of 31)

How does Finding Good in Bad Things Make Life Better?

Even when things look really bleak, we can still find good in them.

We are living in interesting times, in many ways like the Chinese curse.  There are a lot of people who seem hell-bent on messing with social order, let alone taking away good things for people in the name of politics and money.

Yes, this is mostly a pretty terrible thing.  And yet, there has been good to have come of it.  People are taking more notice, taking more action, and striving to have their voices heard.  We are seeing effort participating in the dialogue, and maybe from there we will see positive change of it.

Here’s the thing to keep in mind.  If we focus on the bad, and we focus on anger, and the things that are negative out there, we will draw more of them to us.  That’s the way conscious reality creation works.  What you focus on, think about, feel about, and act on – you bring out more of.

It’s far too easy to get caught up in this madness.  What terrible thing did the President say or Tweet today?  How much further will Congress erode our democracy?  What is North Korea up to?  If we give this our attention, we energize it, and that will only amplify it, and draw more of it to us.

I know I don’t want that.  I can’t imagine anyone who does.

While it’s hard enough to not let national and international matters steal our attention, what do we do when we have more personal negativity to contend with?  What can we do to find good things in problems we are encountering on a more direct level?

Is there good to be found?

There is always something good to be found in bad things.  Flat tire on the way home from work?  Maybe that kept you from being part of a far worse accident.  Lost your job?  Perhaps it was not a great job for you, and now you can get something better.  Family member dying from cancer?  When they pass, they will no longer be suffering.

Jen Sincero, in You Are A Badass (I CANNOT recommend this book enough), writes about the notion of exploring unexpected and unwanted situations by stating, “This is good because” and taking it from there.  Certainly there will be times this is more of a struggle than other times, but that does not lessen its power to change how you are thinking and feeling.

I am in no way advocating for denial of bad feelings.  We are only human, we are going to have experiences that make us feel bad, and that we would rather not endure.  Everybody gets broken up with, loses a job, fails a test, gets injured, loses family and friends due to anything from disagreements to death.  We are going to have miserable experiences.  Full stop.  However, when this happens – if we dwell on them, keep our focus on them and let them dictate further emotions, we are more likely to gain more bad feelings similar to them.

Another issue with modern society is our tendency to not bother with accountability.  We love to blame, we love to pass the buck, we love to make excuses rather than take responsibility.  You hurt me and you made me feel this way and you make me so angry are all-too-common statements.  Without a doubt, other people can be the catalyst for our feelings, but only we can feel them for ourselves.

Focus on that which you can control.

I cannot do anything about what our government is doing, except to write letters, make phone calls, and vote in elections.  I can spread awareness about injustices, but if I am wholly focused on that negativity, I will only get angrier, frustrated, and draw more ways to feel angry, frustrated and negative overall.

The challenge is to be active, do something productive and constructive, but keep focus on that which you can directly effect.  I can share my own thoughts, try to persuade you to my way of thinking, but I cannot control how you will feel.  Period, end of story.  You, and you alone, feel what you feel, and the same applies to me.

That being written, it’s important to tighten our focus, and take an approach to work with the things we do have control over.  Our individual corners of the universe may seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things, but they are the only aspects of life we have total control over.

Pathwalking is about finding and traversing our own ways in life.  This is not the simplest idea, and there are challenges and obstacles and curves along the way.  Yet rather than letting life happen around us, we are choosing to take charge, and be aware of those things we can control.

We have no control over anyone else’s life choices.  This is why it’s important to be more aware of our own lives, our own existence, and to focus on working with what we have to make the best of the lives we are living.

This is Good Because…

…we get to choose.  This is Good Because we can find almost any path we desire, and take the journey of our life upon it.  Consciousness Creates Reality.  I want to manifest the most joyful, amazing, fulfilling life I can.  I am not a slave to anyone else, I am not beholden to anyone but me when it comes to my feelings.

Yes, it is important to be aware of what’s going on out there.  We need to be aware of this world to participate in it.  But there is a line between being aware and being overwhelmed, and it is so, so easy to cross that line.

Be the best you that you can be.  Walk the path that makes you feel the most good, the most happy, the most accomplished that you can.   When you experience unpleasant, unwanted and negative things in life, choose to process them and let them go; or hold onto them and let them dominate your life, and draw more similar negatives to you.

We are far more powerful than many would want us to be believe.  We are all creators, and we are all capable of manifesting incredible things.  Try to keep that in mind the next time you despair.

What good can you find in bad things you are experiencing?

 

This is the two-hundred ninety-first entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Please take a moment to subscribe to this blog!  Even if you have done so before, there is new material, and a gift with your subscription.

What do I want from my Reality?

What do I want?

I have been asking this question of myself for most of my adult life.  It is both the single most basic question I can ask, as well as massively loaded.  This is a question that can be rooted in the past, awareness in the present, or looking to the future, which complicates things further.

One of the more complex issues I encounter with this question has long been its opposite.  I was less sure of what I DID want, than of what I DIDN’T want.  While that can be useful, it can also be distracting.  In many ways it becomes the ultimate procrastination.

I spent my twenties indecisively.  I went from relationship to relationship and job to job, always seeking the greener grasses.  While getting hit by that car shifted my thinking in many ways, I proceeded to spend my thirties in nearly the same indecision.  Relationships came and went, jobs came and went, and I never made a decisive choice about anything.

Now, in my forties, I am deciding my life.  I have begun to work with consciously creating my reality.  This has required me to undo a lot of long-held beliefs that no longer serve me, which in turn slows the process, sometimes seemingly to a crawl.

I have decided.

I have been posting to this blog at least weekly for over five-and-a-half years.  Twice weekly for almost three-and-a-half years.  Thrice weekly for forty weeks now.  This was the result of me deciding to do something.  It was one of the first solid, unquestioned decisions I made after decades of indecisions.

Now, in my forties, I have come to realize the importance of decision.  Rather than hmm and haw and deliberate endlessly, I am working with deciding.  This is not always easy, as I have spent most of my adult life afraid that the wrong decision would make me unhappy, so more often than not I decided not to decide at all.

One of the pitfalls of this realization for me is a vague sense of regret.  How much of my time did I waste on my lack of decisions?  However, the other side of the same coin is recognizing all that I learned from my previous, indecisive ways.

Now that I know how powerful working with decision is, I am forgiving myself for my past missteps and non-steps, and working more in the here-and-now on being who I want to be.

Present reality is a product of the past.

This concept is very hard for me to wrap my head around.  Yet every single self-help and spiritual book I have read or listened to espouses this same idea.  The life I have, right now, is the result of decisions made and not made in my past.  Because consciousness creates reality, decision is a product of conscious choice.  When I decide, I am the one responsible for the reality I am creating.

Knowing this, and not being entirely satisfied with my current reality, I am working on making more conscious decisions to create better.  I can take better care of my body and mind; I can do work that makes me happy rather than saps my energy; I can focus on abundance to bring more good into my life, and the lives of those I care about.

I am completely aware of this.  I know how this works.  Knowing what I want and making decisions in the here-and-now will build the life I most desire.  Yet I still struggle with indecision, and not letting outside influences upset me.

World news can be distressing.  The American political landscape is thoroughly upsetting.  Friends are struggling with all kinds of different issues.  Awareness of these things is important, so long as I don’t let them interfere with my decision making process.  The only life I can directly influence and effect is my own.  The only reality I can consciously create is mine.

Knowing what I want is just a step across the bridge.

Change is scary.  The unknown can be unsettling.  Stepping out of my comfort zone has always been particularly challenging, but I have done it before successfully.  I went to college halfway across the country all on my own, and restarted my life.  After college I moved to New Jersey, again restarting my life.  I completely recovered from serious injuries without ever considering any alternative.  So what is holding me back now?

Me.  I am holding me back.  I know what I want, but not how to make it happen.  Yet everything I know about conscious reality creation, every book I have read or listened to tells me the same thing.  To move out of my comfort zone I have to get uncomfortable.  I need to decide to get clear of my limiting beliefs, to take the necessary steps and go for it.

The how is not my concern.  It is the decisions that need to be made.  I need to let go of the uncertainty, the fear, the doubt, the indecision.  The time to decide is now.  I am not my past, and unless I work in the present I will not attain my desired future.  Nothing is holding me back, except of course for me.

What do I want?

I want to be decisive.  I want to live in the now.  I want to consciously create the reality that will have me waking up every morning with a sense of excitement for the day ahead.  I want to straighten my back, square my shoulders, and take steps across the bridges, head held high and confident.  I know what I want.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 26:

Diet:  Overall I have been good on my food intake, though slightly less so when in Knoxville last weekend.

Exercise:  Fencing two days, one lap around the small lake three different days, four laps around the small lake one day, and a trip to the gym.  Exercised four solid days last week.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done.

Meditation:  Four of seven days last week, never less than 7 minutes.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things on four days last week.

 

This is the fortieth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment, even if you have done so before, to subscribe to my blog!

What Will be the Rewards and Consequences of my Decisions?

Conscious reality creation takes place in the now.

We cannot undo the past, and as Yoda says, “Always in motion is the future.”  The only part of reality we truly control is the present.

This week has marked several changes on my part.  All of them involved decisions.  One was in regards to changing this blog for its growth, one will close a long-standing issue I’ve spent more than half-a-decade trying to resolve.  In both instances I had to make a choice, to decide to take an action, each with consequences both real and perceived.

As I was writing Pathwalking this week, I had a moment where a lightbulb went off in my head.  Yes, I long ago recognized that I am the most successful at sabotaging myself, but this is not a matter of sabotage, but of perception.  That matter of perception is a large part of the why behind my not yet manifesting the reality I desire.

To reiterate that point, I constantly feel like I am on the cusp of creating what I want, on the verge of consciously creating my desired reality…and because I keep it just ahead of me, just about to happen, it never manages to actually happen.  So close…but not yet here.

Consciously creating reality requires being aware and present in the here-and-now.  When I am aware, I am able to think what I want, to feel what it will feel like, and take the necessary actions and make the decisions to do it.

Changes and decisions made.

I spent more money than I was comfortable spending shifting this blog from being hosted with the limitations of wordpress dot com to a new host and using the tools of wordpress dot org.  I spent even a bit more because I set-up the ability to move more of my domains to WordPress, so that I can make them better and more powerful, too.  The consequences of that choice were both tangible and intangible.  The former being the money spent is spent, the intangible being the concern of losing what I had already created.  I am pleased to note that, thus far, that does not appear to be the case here.

I took steps to resolve a long-standing matter both personal and financial.  An investment I am no longer benefitting from has been hanging over my head for some time.  The investment is not mine alone, it is shared with family.  We have had different priorities in regards to this, and it’s been the cause of some strife for several years.  The other party has taken action to resolve this, and while I requested specific remuneration, they disagreed.  I disagreed with their reasoning, but rather than draw this out even further, I chose to accept what was offered and move ahead.  The consequences of this choice were both tangible and intangible.  The former being getting less than I feel I should be, the intangible being lost respect between myself and the other party.  This is not yet complete, but I expect no further issues in finally getting resolution.

In both instances there were choices to make.  Though they are vastly different matters, they are the same in being steps forward versus remaining in the comfort zone I am existing in.  Both involved being in the now, and accepting the consequences, good or bad, of my actions.

Being present to manifest.

The point has been driven home this week multiple times how important it is for me to be in the present.  I can only work in the here-and-now to consciously create my reality, and that will only be accomplished when I take my choices and make decisions for action.

I need to stop viewing the manifestation of the reality I desire as being just slightly ahead of me, on the cusp of actually BEING.  I need to see it NOW, here and present and happening.  Last week I discussed the power of I AM in crossing the bridges, but this is exactly that.  By thinking, feeling and saying, “I am on the cusp of making this happen!” I am leaving the reality I want to live in just ahead of myself.  There it us, just out of my grasp, almost, nearly visible through the haze.  So.  Close.

I need to decide that “I am manifesting my reality.”  In the present, in the here-and-now, I am creating the reality I want and manifesting the life I believe I am capable of having.  This is a decision no different from the others I have made this week, albeit composed of more intangibles.

I need to choose to think in the here and now, “I am consciously creating my reality.  I am doing it.  It is manifesting all around me, right here, right now.”  The consequences of this choice are both tangible and intangible.  The former is getting to do what I really want to be doing with my life and truly practicing what I write about.  The latter is the concern that the people I care about will think I am off my rocker, that they will abandon me and I will fail.

I think this is a decision I will ultimately be happy with.  I know that, here and now, I am.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 24:

Diet:  Overall I have been good on my food intake.

Exercise:  Fencing three days, one to four laps around the small lake three different days.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on my modern alchemist story one day.

Meditation:  Every day last week, never less than 5 minutes.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things every day last week.

 

This is the thirty-eighth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please subscribe to my mailing list!  New and exciting features are coming to this blog.  See the information on the sidebar.

 

How to Make Monday YOUR Day

Today will be whatever you make it be.

It’s far too easy to approach Monday and the traditional start of the work week with distress, trepidation, displeasure, and unhappiness.  There is an entire culture of Monday woe in this society, which has been and continues to be capitalized on, and as such gets reinforced.

Does anyone want Monday to suck?  I am pretty sure the answer is NO.  I don’t really know anyone who wants to be miserable, who wants to have a bad day and a bad week, or who craves feeling powerless and unhappy.

We are all so much more powerful than we give ourselves credit for.  For real, we are the creators of the world in which we live.  My favorite line from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory has always been, “We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams.”  In other words, we have control over the lives we live.  We choose the beat we dance to in this life, and the dreams we experience.

Keeping this in mind, why do we so readily ascribe lousiness to Monday?  Because that’s our culture.  We have this wide-ranging belief that Monday, as the beginning of the new work week, is going to probably be no fun, distressing, and generally unpleasant.

If like attracts like, and consciousness creates reality, what do you think approaching Monday with dread is going to do?  Further, why perpetuate this negative, frankly depressing approach to a day in our lives?  We are only on this earth for a limited time.  Yeah, there are going to be days that suck, and there are going to be issues and problems and challenges to be had, and sometimes it really is easiest to just go with it, go with the flow, let it be as it will be.

However, we have a choice.  Rather than fall into this notion and allow for another lousy Monday, another set-up for a less-than-desired work week, why don’t we seek better?  Why don’t we use the tools we have available to us like gratitude and positivity generators to change the station, tune in more desirable music?

Yes, we will need to expend some effort to break from the norm.  It could make people look at us askance, and wonder why we aren’t doing things in the same way they are.  So what?  If like attracts like, and consciousness creates reality, if we approach the week from a positive perspective, then we are apt to attract more positives our way.

Monday needn’t start us off in deficit, we have the ability instead to begin in abundance.  Wouldn’t you rather look to be content and happy than distraught and unhappy?  Seems like a no-brainer to me.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that we have the power to choose how to approach the start of the work week, we can work on choosing to approach it from a place of abundance.  When we see the day for possibility rather than for impossibility, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-sixth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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How do you recognize if you’re walking the right Path?

How do I know if I am on the right path?

This is probably the most basic, yet most challenging question to ask.  The answer is both amazingly simple, and yet fairly complicated.

Pathwalking is making choices about living life, in order to work to consciously create our personal reality as we want it to be.  Rather than simply going along with life and letting whatever happens, happen; as we walk our chosen paths we strive to be present and aware.  We don’t want to let life just occur, we are working on living life to its fullest.

There is always more than one path.  That’s how the universe works.  If consciousness creates reality, as this blog asserts, then we can choose virtually any path we might desire.  As such, there is more than one “right” path for us.

It’s important to recognize that the idea of “right” is fairly loaded.  Right is often the extreme opposite of wrong, but in this context right is a matter of feeling, desire, and drive.  Further, today’s right choice could be wrong for us tomorrow.

I recognize that that’s pretty vague.  This is because the specifics of what is right for me are not going to necessarily be right for you, or for anyone else for that matter.  “Right” in this particular context is a matter of feeling, belief and faith.

How do I recognize the right path?

The short answer is that the right path will feel good.  It will almost seem like its too easy, and the work you do along the right path feels less like work, and more like play.  It’s surprisingly easy to lose track of time when you are on the right path, because you get so caught up in it you just take action because it’s what you need to do.

For example, when I am writing, and really getting into my work, whether it’s my blog or my fiction or even writing for business, I often just flow with it. Time loses meaning, and I come away from a project feeling complete, content, and like I wasn’t working at all, just doing what feels good to me.

I desire to be writing more frequently.  I am driven to write, and that is how I am certain that this is the path that is right for me.

It feels good.  It feels like it is what I am supposed to do.  That is how I know my path is the right path.  But to really be travelling upon that path, it’s important to believe and have faith.

What’s the difference between belief and faith?

In many respects these are similar concepts, but not in this context.  How does this work, then?  Belief is important to Pathwalking, because if you don’t believe that consciousness can create reality, and that you can choose your own destiny, your own path in life, then you are going to be incapable of living this way.

I believe that I can create the life I desire.  I have made this work before, more than once.  And that is where faith comes into play.

I believe in this…but I don’t necessarily have faith.  I believe, in the abstract, but my faith in my own belief is open to scrutiny, questioned by my own skepticism.  But more than that, what this boils down to is my faith in myself.  I believe that consciousness creates reality, but I have no faith in myself to consciously create it.

If I am responsible for consciously creating my reality, then I need to have faith in myself.  I am the only one who can make MY life what I want it to be.  But if I lack faith in myself, what can I do?

How do you create faith in yourself?

When you believe in yourself, you believe you are capable of almost anything.  We nearly all feel this way as children, but as we get older and we are exposed to certain “realities”, this fades.  We can regain our ability to believe in abstracts, but after that we have to have faith – faith in ourselves.

Skepticism, cynicism, self-doubt, self-recrimination, second-guessing and self-deprecation are all born of a lack of faith.  Despite what you might believe about conscious reality creation, you don’t have sufficient faith in yourself to achieve it.  This is evident if your self-talk is frequently negative, such as I am no good; I am unimportant; I am fat; I am lazy; I fail more often than I succeed; if I don’t joke about myself everyone else will; and so on.  When you speak ill of yourself, it shows a lack of faith in who you are capable of being.

You may not be who you want to be right now.  That’s ok.  One of the reasons to choose Pathwalking is to become the person you most want to be, even if that is not who you are now.  To do that you have to think about it, feel it out, take inspired, intentional actions – and believe in the possibility; have faith in your ability to succeed.  When it feels like you can conquer the world, and you believe in conscious reality creation and have faith in yourself, you will know that are on the right path for you.

Do you have faith in yourself and your ability to choose your own destiny?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-fourth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Five Quick-and-Easy Positivity Generators

Everyone prefers to feel good over feeling bad.

Finding positivity is about finding ways to feel good.  We live in a society that feeds on a steady diet of negativity.  Fear is a tool employed by many differently “leaders” to keep people in line, and sensationalism sells and gets more clicks on social media.  This can make it far easier to live in fear and negativity than to find positivity.

Also, it’s Monday…so most of us are going to work after a weekend off.  It is widely accepted that Mondays should be loathed.  I figure, why start the work week in negativity and set that tone for the week, when we can create positivity and allow ourselves to feel better.

There are many, many things that generate positivity, but the follow five are things you can do with little or no effort, more than once in a given day, and they will help.

  1. Smile. Seriously, just take a minute and smile.  You don’t need to laugh, you don’t need to have anything in particular to smile about, simply smile for a minute or so, and see how you feel.
  2. Breathe deeply. Take at least two minutes to breathe deeply, intentionally.  Really focus on the breathing, and let the air in.  You’d be surprised how just breathing and not doing anything else will make you feel.
  3. Sit or stand more erect. Consider your posture.  When you slouch and slump, there is no energy flow.  When you stand up straight or sit up straight, you energize your core, and you would be surprised how that will improve your mood.
  4. Stretch. Roll your neck, roll your shoulders, stretch out your arms and legs for a minute or two. These are the only bodies we have, and we tend to abuse them.  Stretching doesn’t just keep our joints and muscles strong, it also helps us relax and feel more flexible.
  5. Disconnect. Go offline for a few minutes.  Take a short walk.  Step away from whatever you are doing and reset yourself.  This can be less than five minutes, and I always have suspected this is part of the allure for smokers.  You get away from it all a few minutes to get your nicotine fix.  Well, for non-smokers, we also need a few minutes to get away and break from things.  Leave your computes, tablets and phones behind for 1 to 5 minutes, and free yourself.

None of these things need to take more than five minutes, and can take as little as one minute.  All of them will allow us to feel better, and I know that I prefer to feel good over feeling bad.  It seems so very simple, and yet we tend to neglect this all too easily.

There are other options out there, but I suggest rather than getting caught up in the negativity of the world at large, each of us can generate positivity for ourselves, and from there we might find we can do much, much more than we think.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that there are little things we can do to feel good, we have tools at our disposal to improve our days.  When we make the effort to use these tools to check and alter our feeling, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-fifth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Five_Easy_Steps_to_C_Cover_for_Kindle(1)

What are challenges vs struggles with Pathwalking?

Pathwalking can be fraught with many challenges.

I long ago came to believe that nothing worth having is ever easy.  But there is a difference between challenge and struggle.  Challenge involves growth and proactive change, while struggle is stagnation and reactive change.  Challenge is deciding to change, while struggle is forced.

Many of the challenges in Pathwalking are due to outside influences, some which we can control and some which we cannot.  Recognizing this is the first step towards working with it, and keeping challenges from becoming struggles.

Further, when you recognize that you are struggling, it is possible to transmute your struggle into a challenge.  This is where taking control of the matters which you can control comes into play.

What is outside of your control?  Other people, situations that are not of your making, world news and such.  Let’s face it…we live in tumultuous times.  There is a tremendous amount of upheaval and reactionary measures happening because people are either making poor choices or no choices due to fear of change.  We can protest, we can vote more wisely, we can choose where and how to spend our money, but we cannot change these people, their actions or how they think, no matter how badly we want to do that.

What is inside of your control?  Everything that is yours in your life.  Your thoughts, feelings and actions, your situations, your mental state, how you use your time and so on.  You are the only person who can think for you, feel for you, act for you.  Nobody else can make you think, feel or do anything you do not allow yourself to think, feel and do.

We frequently give this away without realizing that we are doing that.  They influenced my thinking and she made me feel that way and I only did that thing because you made me do it.  Easy enough to give that power away, but that is a choice, a decision.  The power is yours, but you get to choose if you will take hold of it, or not.

Looking out for yourself is not selfish.

We live in a society obsessed with polar opposites.  Black and white, rich and poor, conservative and liberal, gay and straight, fat and thin, etc.  We are inundated with choices of either/or, when the truth is most people in every way fall somewhere between extremes.

One of these is the notion that if you are not selfless, you are selfish.  As such, we often find ourselves believing that self-care is selfish, so we neglect it to care for others.  Then we wonder why we are struggling, when we have accepted this notion and let ourselves take a second-rate place in our own lives.

When we do not hold onto things for ourselves, and we do not care for ourselves, we actually take away our ability to give to others.  We have to be full in order to have enough to share, and because this is an abundant universe that is not a selfish notion.  We are all unique individuals, and we all have different needs and wants, but no matter what those may be, we all need to care for ourselves.  Putting yourself first is perfectly fine, so long as you don’t ignore that there is a world apart from yourself.  You are the center of your own world, but you are also a part of rather than apart from the rest of the world. That’s an important distinction to remain clear on.

Choose challenge.  Choose change.

Change is inevitable.  It will happen, because that is part of life and growth.  Even when you are standing perfectly still, the air around you is changed by your body heat and your breath.  That is the nature of all things.  So rather than struggle from resisting change, accept the challenges that may come from change.

The challenges of Pathwalking will be different for everyone.  Things I find simple and easy you may find unbelievably difficult, and vice versa.  I am a thinker, and while I am empathic, I have often struggled to understand people who are true feelers.  However, while I can be logical about my feelings, actually understanding the meanings of my feelings can be difficult for me.  Then there are people who are doers – they take actions with seemingly little thought or feeling going into them, sometimes with extreme wisdom and sometimes less so.

Many of the challenges thinkers, feelers or doers will experience may be similar, but they may also vary rather widely.  The thing is to make the choices and decide to work on challenges we face, rather than to let choices and decisions out of our control, and work on struggles that drain us and disempower us.

Pathwalking is empowering.

Despite challenges and occasional struggles, Pathwalking, ultimately, is empowering.  Choosing your own path means that you are working on deciding how you want life to be.  When we decide this for ourselves, we open ourselves to discovering our happiness, and that, I believe, is the thing we most want to know.

When you are struggling, it is always possible to face it head-on and turn it into a challenge.  It may not be easy, but I believe empowering the self is always worthwhile.  Choosing my own destiny and deciding how I want to be I believe is key to living the best life I possibly can.

What challenges do you work with regularly, and how do you approach them?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-third entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Where can you find Positivity?

Positivity can be found anywhere we look.

There are all sorts of thing, big and small, that can bring about positivity.  Sometimes they are easier to see than others.

We are alive and breathing.  We have amazing technology at our fingertips.  We are capable of loving and being loved.  We can have, do or be pretty much anything we desire.  There is sky above us and earth beneath our feet.

I know that it can feel like an impossible struggle to find positivity out there.  Sometimes the weather is upsetting, at times those we love and respect are disappointing us, and don’t even get me started on the state of politics in the world today.  And yet, even with all that taken into account, there are still ways to uncover and relish in positivity.

Sometimes we just need to slow down, take a breath, and maybe step away from things that are giving us more negativity than we desire.  Sometimes we need distractions, finding things to make us smile and laugh or otherwise redirect our thought processes.

Gratitude and inclusion can go a very long ways towards generating positivity.  Doesn’t it feel good to hear someone say “thank you?”  Do you know that saying “thank you” can be just as powerful, if not more so?  Expressing gratitude in our lives builds positive energy like nothing else can…and it’s really, really easy.

Perfect example – today in the United States is Memorial Day.  I want to say Thank You to everyone who has given of themselves to serve the country and protect and defend what we believe in.  Thank you, also, to those who offer the closest support to these men and women.  Thank you.

Our society is currently experiencing a real problem with exclusion.  We are being artificially divided by race, color, creed, religion, gender, and any other artifice one could devise so that those who feel they are in power can stay there.  When we work to be inclusive instead, however, we can generate an unbelievable amount of positivity, and when we work together we all benefit.

Yes, finding positivity can feel pretty hard.  But finding and generating positivity is good for our overall wellbeing, and it is always available to us – we just have to seek it out, and keep ourselves open to it.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that we can find positivity almost anywhere that we look for it, we can open ourselves up to new ways to feel good and be happier.  When we make the effort to uncover and partake of positivity, we make ourselves feel healthier, and as such we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-fourth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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Why Walk Your Own Path? You Control More Than You Think

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.

This can be a particularly difficult concept to believe, but that doesn’t lessen the truth of it.  You are in control over how you think, how you feel, and how you act.

I know that sometimes it feels like that control is really, really limited.  Truth is, however, that the only limitations are those that you yourself place.  Otherwise, you have far more power and capability to change your life as you would most desire than you probably believe.

I created Pathwalking with the intent of taking control over my life, and creating the destiny I believe I am meant for.  I have long known that the standard courses in life were not for me, and overall I have not taken those particular paths.

One career since college?  Nope, not at all.  I have held numerous jobs, but not followed a single career path until fairly recently.  Marriage in my late twenties or early thirties and raise kids?  Nope, didn’t get married until my early forties, and we’re not going to produce children.  Buy a house, use it to build equity and maintain stability?  While I have been a homeowner, the current plan is to not buy again anytime soon, and rent for the purpose of mobility.

Why am I pointing these out?  Because it is way too easy to let society dictate control over our lives.  We live in a society that discourages us from striking out on our own path, rather than choosing something not-the-normal.  Rather than empower the individual, our society prefers to keep us underfoot, at the whim of our bosses, our religious and political leaders, our supposed superiors.

You are In Charge of You

Nobody is superior to anybody else.  It does not matter if they have more education, more money, more experience or are older than you or more specialized, the only person you answer to, when all is said and done, is you.  The only power anyone else enjoys over you is in place because you have given it away.

That is a particularly hard pill to swallow.  We are so indoctrinated into this idea that other people can control us, that other people can be responsible for our emotions and actions, that we cannot believe this is only true because we allow it to be.  Other people are only able to affect us as much or as little as we allow them to.

For example, let’s say you were in a relationship, but then your partner unceremoniously dumped you.  Yes, you feel hurt, probably betrayed, and upset…but chances are you blame them for hurting you.  They caused you to be hurt, they treated you poorly, and in all likelihood your feelings and opinion of your former partner will only spiral downwards from there.

Yes, it was the action on the part of your former partner that caused those bad feelings.  Yes, it is perfectly normal and totally human to feel hurt, betrayed and upset.  But, you are the one feeling these feelings. As such, you get to choose how long you will hold onto them, and how far along the downward spiral you care to travel.

You are the only one who can feel how you feel.  While there are uncountable outside influences that can and will effect how you feel, you are the only one who actually feels what you feel.  As such, the person who has caused you to hurt only hurts you for as long as you allow them to have that power over you.

Taking another step from here, you and only you are responsible for your actions.  Nobody can make you do anything you do not choose to do.  Yet because our society is so keyed into not being accountable for anything, it is easy to place the blame for bad actions we have taken -outside of ourselves.

Take Back Your Power

When you understand that you are the one in control of your own thoughts, feelings and actions, you get to choose how much of that control to exert.  You will feel upset for as long as you hold onto it, and you will not take an action that is not of your own accord, unless you choose to and blame it on another.  You are the one who gets to decide.  You get to choose.

You will notice over the coming weeks changes to this blog.  I am studying new ideas to improve what I share here, and that means things will be changing.  Since change is inevitable, happens whether we want it or not, I am exerted control over change, and choosing to alter this how I desire the change to be.

Last week I explained how intention is the reality of control.  Intention is composed of thought and feeling and action, and you are the only person who can control all of your thoughts, your feelings and your actions.  Nobody else can choose for you, nobody else can be in control, unless you allow them to be.  You can keep the power over your thoughts, feelings and actions, or you can give it away in part or total.  That is your decision.

Consciousness creates reality.  Recognizing our own control over the vast majority of our lives, we can be empowered to make almost anything we can imagine of them.  We are free thinkers; we are the only ones who feel the things we feel, however we feel them; we are the only ones who can act on our own thoughts and feelings.

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.  When you recognize this, embrace it and see just how endless the possibilities are before you.

What feels out of your control that you can take back for yourself?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-second entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

How to Build Positivity: Getting into Better Shape

Taking steps to get in shape can generate massive positivity.

Getting in shape can also take a number of different forms.  Health is not simply measured as physical, but also mental, spiritual and emotional.  Giving attention to any one of these can improve our quality of life and be massively positive, while working on more than one or all of them can be hugely empowering.

Everyone is familiar with processes for getting into shape physically.  Diet and exercise, skin care, and other activities to maintain and improve ourselves are where the majority of the focus tends to go when we strive to get in shape.  We eat better, we exercise more, we work on taking better care of these physical vessels where we will exist for our whole time on earth.

Getting into shape mentally can take several different forms.  Reading books and listening to lectures or taking other steps to improve our knowledge base, playing games to sharpen our minds, getting enough rest…anything that provides the mind stimulus or flexibility gets us into mentally better health.  Mental health also involves dealing with matters such as anxiety and depression, and working on keeping ourselves together in the best manners possible.

Getting into spiritual shape is easy to neglect.  Everyone has different types and degrees of faith, whether we are talking about a belief in God, or the Universe, or even in yourself.  This is not about religion, that’s a wholly separate idea.  Spiritual health is believing that we can do great things, that we can find and create the impossible, and that we recognize and care for our inner light, the energy that is our core being, our souls.  This is the least tangible aspect we possess in ourselves, but one that should not be neglected.

Emotional health is separate from mental health, in that our feelings and state of mind can differ.  Granted, when we feel low, when we are down or sad or depressed we will have a harder time creating the things we most desire.  Yet we are completely able to take ahold of and change our emotional state at will.  Exercising this particular ability really helps us to get into the best possible shape emotionally we can.

There are two particular activities that can help us get into better physical, mental, emotional and spiritual shape.  The first is simply breathing.  Pausing to breathe intentionally from time to time heightens our awareness, draws more oxygen into our bloodstream, can clear the mind and help get ahold of our emotions, and raises the spirit.  The second is meditation.  Taking the time to be still and enter into the place of no mind provides even more stimulus and shaping up than intentional breathing.

Working on getting into better shape is always a matter of positivity, no matter what aspect you are working on to that end.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that we can work on getting into better shape mentally, spiritually, and emotionally as well as physically, we gain an amazing tool for building positivity.  When we work on improving our state of being within any of these realms, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-third entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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