The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: writer (Page 1 of 11)

How does a non-planner plan?

Making a plan has not always been my strong suit.

I tend to take actions as needed, but planning?  Not so much.

From time to time I will make a plan.  But more often than not, I just go along and do what I need to do.

This is not tremendously compatible with the notion of conscious reality creation.

Make a planTake my writing, for instance.  A friend once told me there are two kinds of writers in the world – planners and pantsers.  Planners will develop detailed worldbuilding, chapter outlines, character biographies and other information before they even start to write the actual story.  Pantsers write by the seat of their pants.  They sit down, and they begin to write out what is in their head.  Along the way you develop character information, the world, even plot information as you go along.

I am a pantser.  I start to write, and along the way I figure out the plot and details of my characters and my worlds and so on.  The Source Chronicles began with a single character and a scene (which in the end appears later in the story as a flashback), then another scene with another character, then another…and then I’m a hundred pages in and the story is developing.

With a few exceptions that is how I write.  One of the wild things about the world of The Vapor Rogues was that, to write the first short story, I had to build a pretty complex world.  The world of The Source Chronicles didn’t get fully fleshed out until I was in the middle of Finder, before Seeker was edited.

The trouble is, conscious reality creation requires planning.

How does a non-planner make a plan?

Despite Pathwalking, the first step I took in developing my conscious reality creation, for over five-and-a-half years, I only recently have started to analyze that my planning skills are lacking.  Sure, I have had ideas for things I want to manifest in my life, but true plans to effect their manifestation have been less forthcoming.

For me, this presents several complications.  I have mentioned before that I tend to get too caught up in figuring out HOW this will all come to pass.  How will I get from this thought I have – I want to be a bestselling author – to manifestation of my idea?  I am feeling it out, I have written the books and published them…so now what?

This is where I have been stuck for a while now.  I know what I want.  I have given it a lot of thought, I have considered and felt what it will feel like to be the success I dream of being.  There have been intentional actions taken, such as editing and publishing my works.  And yet, here I am, barely selling a book or two a week.

This is why it may be necessary for me to consider better my planning.  I can imagine that this will take two distinct forms, but that I need to be careful my planning does not contradict or restrict what the Universe may offer me along the way.

What steps will be involved in my planning?

The first plan has to do with how it will feel to be a success.  I need to sit down and write out what it will feel like to live the life I want.  I’ve written out for myself what it looks like, but not what it feels like.  How will it feel to be working in my home office at my craft?  What will conventions and book signings feel like?  How will seeing my name on the bestseller’s list make me feel?

Once I answer these questions, because of how manifestation works, it’s important that I don’t feel it in the future…I need to feel it NOW.  It has to feel like it’s done, it IS, and that this is the life I have.  That is key to consciously creating reality.

The second plan has to do with what I am doing in the here and now.  This will help me to determine further intentional actions that will allow me to manifest my goal.  I have to plan to take time every day to feel through my thoughts.  I need to envision what my life will look like as if this is the life I am living now.  In doing that I open myself to finding inspiration.  Thus inspired, I gain insight to intentional actions I can take, and from there I give the energy needed to manifest the reality I seek to create.

Writing it out.

Writing out plans and scheduling myself is something of a foreign concept to me.  Yet I can see that this is something that is totally necessary to my wellbeing.  What’s more, this is absolutely a part of the process of conscious reality creation.

The action necessary is to not just say I need to write this out – it’s time to make it happen.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 32:

The goal log has not been fully maintained this week, as I am attending the Pennsic War.

 

This is the forty-sixth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

What Happens When the “Other Shoe” Drops?

When the other shoe drops, do you pick it up?

I have been anticipating this situation for several months now.  I had hoped to depart on my own terms, but I suspected this was coming.  So it was not much of a surprise.

The job I have held for the past year, and been duly grateful for, has come to an end.  Now my eight hours a day in a place where I was all-too-often bored, and frequently unhappy, is no more.

I am not upset nor angry about this.  Rather, I am seeing it as an opportunity to move my life forward.  Consciousness creates reality, and I know what it is I want to create.  There are bridges I want to cross, and cross them I will.

Since I was let go from the job, I have made excellent use of my time.  A while back I created a schedule I called A Day in the Life – The Life I Most Desire.  In that schedule I laid out my work day (starting at 8:30am), giving myself time for writing and editing, exercise, reading, lunch.  I even gave myself time to goof off in the morning, play games, put my brain in gear at my own pace.

How will this make me money?  That is not what I am currently focused on.  I am concerned with living life in the manner I have long desired, and from this action find everything I need to live as fully as I can.

Can I sustain this?  That remains to be seen.  I am striving to find a way, because this is how I want my life to be.

Can I make money doing what I love?

This is the elephant in the room, the question that most needs to be answered.  Can I work this all out so that I will make money doing this?  How can I make this happen?  Is there a way I can get this blog to make money; more books to sell; other options that involve writing for money?

The first step in manifestation is believing.  Faith, which I mentioned before, is important to conscious reality creation.  Most of all, faith in myself as a creator, and from there faith in the Universe.  Faith in my belief in conscious reality creation and manifestation.

I know that this works, as I have made it work before.  I need to apply it to now, to my life as it currently is, and to become whom I want to be.  To do that I have to think it, feel it, take actions like following this schedule I created to make it so.

The Secret approaches conscious reality creation with different words – Ask, Believe and Receive.  Action for the thought – ask; for the feeling, believe; for the intentional action, receive.  In thinking about this life I want to live, I am asking of myself to become a professional, full-time writer.  When it comes to feeling, I am believing that I have made this manifest.  Lastly, my actions are a reflection of my receiving what I have asked for.

Where do I go from here?

Now that I am not spending most of my waking hours in a place where I was unhappy, I am better able to feel positive, to feel how it feels to succeed at what I want.  Yes, I could dwell on the loss of my salary and changes to my benefits, but in what way will that be healthy?  I instead am making a choice to take this situation and make the very best of it that I can.

Life is too short to spend so much of it unhappy.  How come we accept so readily that this is what work is meant to be?  I know that I need to make money to pay for the things I want and need in life, but do I have to miserable making it?  Why do we so easily accept that at face value?

I think somewhere along the way we, as a society, have lost sight of what we work for.  We are not on this planet for the limited time we get to be here just to go through the motions, we are here to live.  We are here to experience life, good and bad, up and down, in all its amazing glory.  Spending eight or more hours every day in a place that leaves us exhausted, unhappy and stressed does not make any sense.

Yet we all know that we have to earn money, and to earn money we have to work.  The goal is often to earn as much money as possible, and that being the case we will take the jobs that pay the most and offer the best benefits, even when they do not make us happy.  That’s the standard way we do it.

I am not a standard person.

I have never been “normal”, whatever that means.  My life has regularly involved partaking of a different path, a unique way of being – sometimes by choice, but in my youth more often by circumstance.  For example, I didn’t choose for my parents to divorce when it was an uncommon thing in the 1980’s.  It was not my choice to be a part of the relatively small Jewish community in the ‘burbs of Minneapolis, surrounded by a majority of Lutherans.  I chose to pursue theatre in my high school rather than with the local JCC.  Then I chose to be the only graduate of my HS to attend Ithaca College in New York State.

Before I understood intentional actions and conscious reality creation, I frequently did unusual things.  I made choices that were entirely my own.  But due to my lack of understanding about conscious reality creation, I frequently have experienced being the square peg attempting to fit into the round hole.  I need to leave no room for doubt, and create the life I most desire.

Sometimes this is more challenging than not, but I am going to make it work.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 30:

Diet:  I’ve been pretty good this week overall, following a weekend of not as good.

Exercise:  Fencing one day, four days of various exercise at the gym, and an afternoon of swimming.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done; editing of Harbinger occurred; I did some work on my sci-fi novel.

Meditation:  Five of seven days last week, never less than 5 minutes.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things on five days last week.

 

This is the forty-fourth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

Why Do I Write?

I write on a lot of different topics.

It all began when I was nine, and I wrote (and illustrated) a 50 page sci-fi story.  I wrote a few other bits and pieces along the way.  Then I learned to type, and I started typing sci-fi works.  Then I started to write fantasy.

I began The Source Chronicles in 1998.  There was a scene, followed by another scene, then another.  In time I had a novel.  The novel became a series, which I am continuing to work on (all-too-slowly, though).

I don’t recall when, but I started blogging from time to time on LiveJournal.  Eventually, I started this blog, and now I post three times a week on different aspects of conscious reality creation.

I have mentioned on more than one occasion that I write in more than one genre.  One of the reasons I began these posts was to build the bridges between them, to better express myself as a writer.

For a long time I did not call myself a writer.  I would write things, both for work and for my own pleasure, but I didn’t call myself writer.  Then I got my first short story published, and from there my own self-talk changed.  I began to think, hey, I AM a writer.

Why, if I’ve written about this before am I bringing it up once again?  Because I am still working on my own doubts, my own skepticism, my own fears that I am only a pretender to the title.

What IS a writer?

I have a talent for getting caught up in my own head.  I question things, I doubt, I get skeptical, I get distracted.  For much of my life I saw the definition of a writer as either a published journalist, or a published author.  Anything in between was a pretender, a wannabe, a hobbyist.  That’s where I placed myself for some time.

Coupled with that, for years and years I did not know what I truly wanted from my life.  I spent a couple of decades exploring ideas, considering options.  I left college with a degree that I had no real use for in the workplace.  Here I was with different talents and skills and ideas, but limited drive and a host of fears holding me back.  There was much bouncing from job to job, but little consistency.

Yet I kept coming back to writing.  No matter what I was doing, somewhere along the way I was writing.  I would blog, I would work on The Source Chronicles, I would be doing something to put words to the page.  It took me a while to recognize that I AM a writer, because this is what I love and how I want to identify myself.

Further, there was the realization that, while I have always found writing in almost every form easy, for many it is not.  Even people I know to be good writers of their own accord come to me for my work, or to edit theirs.

What is a writer?  I no longer define a writer as a published journalist or author.  A writer writes because it is what they do.  A writer is someone who expresses themselves with words in such a way as to evoke understanding, feeling, thought and maybe even inspiration.  Sometimes this is simply a matter of self expression, and sometimes it’s to provide help to others.  I am a writer.

What identifying as a writer means to me.

It is my goal to become a bestselling author.  But more than that, it is my goal to be able to make my living as a writer.  That’s not an easy task.

So far, sales of my books are hobbyist, at best.  I sell a few e books here and there, a paperback or two…but my sales, while all appreciated, are not sufficient to produce steady income.  This blog has not reached that point, either.   Consciousness creates reality, but it requires focus.  I have thought about what I want, felt out what it will feel like, and taken actions to move it all forward.  Yet due to my need to understand the HOW of it, I move forward only at a snail’s pace.

Why does the “how” of it all get in my way?  Because manifesting any goal relies on trusting the Universe to work out the “how”.  For example, medical science told me that surgeries and long periods of time would heal me completely.  I refused to accept that it would take so long as they thought, and though I had no concept of HOW to accelerate my healing, I knew, unquestionably, that it would be so.  They told me it would be 1-3 years before I’d walk again – yet I was walking after 7 months.  The “how” of the speed of my recovery never even crossed my mind, I just knew it would BE.

How is the purview of the Universe.

This is the only aspect of “how” in regards to conscious reality creation.  Thought, feeling, intentional actions, and let the rest fall into place as needs be.  But due to my own skeptical nature, and some well-intentioned resistance, I keep trying to wrap my head around “how” this will happen.  How will I be able to make the money I need to make my living as a writer?

This warrants further examination.  I have no answers today, but questions to consider and further explore.

As always, thank you for Crossing the Bridges with me.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 29:

Diet:  Still maintaining less carbs and sugars.

Exercise:  Fencing one day, three days of a single lap around the small lake.  One more day with a ton of walking.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done.

Meditation:  Six of seven days last week, never less than 6 minutes (save one day with only 2 minutes).

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things on every day last week.

 

This is the forty-third entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

 

How does the use of I AM matter in Crossing the Bridges?

There are actions I can take, right now, to change my life.

The challenge with this is in mindfulness.  While the action I am looking to take is relatively simple, it requires a great deal of mindfulness.

I have written before about the power of the words I AM.  These two little words will ultimately define me, in the here and now, in absolute and specific ways.  I AM is far more powerful than the retrospective I WAS or the future-tensed I WILL BE, because it is a totally definitive declaration.

How I AM is followed is a clear-cut statement.  It will also determine perspective, expectation, and even intent.  What’s more, I AM is a true presentation of belief.

Because consciousness creates reality, what we think about and believe is made manifest.  I AM is so powerful, that it will create more of the representation it is stating.  It is a statement in present tense, which is the most powerful place for manifesting conscious creation.

Yet I know I tend to just toss around I AM statements without much thought.  I think most people do, because we really do not recognize how powerful that statement is.  It’s not about someone else, it is about ME, and as such it is intentional and focused.

How do we consciously create reality?  Thought, focused into feeling, and from feeling taking intentional action.  I AM is an intentional action statement, and is capable of creating all sorts of things, both desirable and undesirable.

Be Aware of what you think and say.

It’s all-too-easy to neglect the power of I AM, and to make statements that might seem innocuous, but in truth are powerful conscious creators.  For example, saying I am tired, I am overwhelmed, I am unhappy, I am depressed, I am fat, I am useless, I am a screw-up will make me precisely that.  I will be tired, overwhelmed, fat and depressed if I continue to abuse the power of I AM in this way.

I know that many of these are true statements.  I may be feeling tired and unhappy, and it may be a fact to state that I am overweight or suffering from depression – but making the statement of I AM reinforces these matters, and empowers them even further.

I am not advocating lying, or denying negative thoughts and feelings.  Lies cannot build much of a foundation, are impossible to sustain, and frequently become harmful, especially to ourselves.  We are going to feel negative emotions, because we’re only human, and if we didn’t know the bad we’d be incapable of knowing the good we most desire.

What I am advocating here is taking just a little more time and consideration in the use of I AM.  Knowing the manifestation power of these two tiny words, it’s hugely important to use them only with care and consideration.

Use I AM to build up, not to tear down.

Despite the truth that may be brought forth in using I AM, exercising thought and restraint in its use can totally change the world I am creating for myself.  Whenever I follow I AM with a negative statement, true or not, I am basically telling the universe this is who and what I believe that I am, so please give me more.

The action I can take, right now, to change my life, is to consider what I am thinking or saying whenever the words I AM are employed.  If I am feeling something negative, rather than express it with an I AM statement, I need to take a more impersonal viewpoint.  I need to step back from it.  For example, let’s say I am feeling tired.  Rather than say or think I am tired, I need to consider either giving that no acknowledgement at all, or an impersonal one, such as I think I could use more sleep or I feel the need for more rest or even I feel tired.  Yes, this last might be splitting hairs, but in not stating I AM, I am not taking ownership and telling the universe this is how I am and want to continue to be.

I AM is a statement of empowerment.

The universe doesn’t recognize the concept of don’t want, it only recognizes want.  Stating I AM TIRED tells the universe this is what I am and what I want.  I am owning the feeling or attribute as me, and in so doing empowering it, and telling the universe I want more of it.  This is why it is important to be aware of the statement that follows I AM, so that I can be more of what I truly want to be.  For example, I AM AWESOME.

That is the immediate, life changing action I am taking.  Every time I think or say I AM, I will take extra time to consider if the statement I am making is one I want, or one I don’t want.  Being aware is going to be a challenge, but one I think could make a massive difference in consciously creating the life I desire.

I am capable of doing this.  I am able to manifest the destiny I want.  I am grateful. Let’s do this.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 23:

Diet:  I am still working on maintaining a reasonable diet.

Exercise:  Couple single lap walks around the small lake, a day at the gym, a night of fencing.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on my modern alchemist story one day.

Meditation:  Five days last week, never less than 9 minutes.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things six days last week.

 

This is the thirty-seventh entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

How do you recognize if you’re walking the right Path?

How do I know if I am on the right path?

This is probably the most basic, yet most challenging question to ask.  The answer is both amazingly simple, and yet fairly complicated.

Pathwalking is making choices about living life, in order to work to consciously create our personal reality as we want it to be.  Rather than simply going along with life and letting whatever happens, happen; as we walk our chosen paths we strive to be present and aware.  We don’t want to let life just occur, we are working on living life to its fullest.

There is always more than one path.  That’s how the universe works.  If consciousness creates reality, as this blog asserts, then we can choose virtually any path we might desire.  As such, there is more than one “right” path for us.

It’s important to recognize that the idea of “right” is fairly loaded.  Right is often the extreme opposite of wrong, but in this context right is a matter of feeling, desire, and drive.  Further, today’s right choice could be wrong for us tomorrow.

I recognize that that’s pretty vague.  This is because the specifics of what is right for me are not going to necessarily be right for you, or for anyone else for that matter.  “Right” in this particular context is a matter of feeling, belief and faith.

How do I recognize the right path?

The short answer is that the right path will feel good.  It will almost seem like its too easy, and the work you do along the right path feels less like work, and more like play.  It’s surprisingly easy to lose track of time when you are on the right path, because you get so caught up in it you just take action because it’s what you need to do.

For example, when I am writing, and really getting into my work, whether it’s my blog or my fiction or even writing for business, I often just flow with it. Time loses meaning, and I come away from a project feeling complete, content, and like I wasn’t working at all, just doing what feels good to me.

I desire to be writing more frequently.  I am driven to write, and that is how I am certain that this is the path that is right for me.

It feels good.  It feels like it is what I am supposed to do.  That is how I know my path is the right path.  But to really be travelling upon that path, it’s important to believe and have faith.

What’s the difference between belief and faith?

In many respects these are similar concepts, but not in this context.  How does this work, then?  Belief is important to Pathwalking, because if you don’t believe that consciousness can create reality, and that you can choose your own destiny, your own path in life, then you are going to be incapable of living this way.

I believe that I can create the life I desire.  I have made this work before, more than once.  And that is where faith comes into play.

I believe in this…but I don’t necessarily have faith.  I believe, in the abstract, but my faith in my own belief is open to scrutiny, questioned by my own skepticism.  But more than that, what this boils down to is my faith in myself.  I believe that consciousness creates reality, but I have no faith in myself to consciously create it.

If I am responsible for consciously creating my reality, then I need to have faith in myself.  I am the only one who can make MY life what I want it to be.  But if I lack faith in myself, what can I do?

How do you create faith in yourself?

When you believe in yourself, you believe you are capable of almost anything.  We nearly all feel this way as children, but as we get older and we are exposed to certain “realities”, this fades.  We can regain our ability to believe in abstracts, but after that we have to have faith – faith in ourselves.

Skepticism, cynicism, self-doubt, self-recrimination, second-guessing and self-deprecation are all born of a lack of faith.  Despite what you might believe about conscious reality creation, you don’t have sufficient faith in yourself to achieve it.  This is evident if your self-talk is frequently negative, such as I am no good; I am unimportant; I am fat; I am lazy; I fail more often than I succeed; if I don’t joke about myself everyone else will; and so on.  When you speak ill of yourself, it shows a lack of faith in who you are capable of being.

You may not be who you want to be right now.  That’s ok.  One of the reasons to choose Pathwalking is to become the person you most want to be, even if that is not who you are now.  To do that you have to think about it, feel it out, take inspired, intentional actions – and believe in the possibility; have faith in your ability to succeed.  When it feels like you can conquer the world, and you believe in conscious reality creation and have faith in yourself, you will know that are on the right path for you.

Do you have faith in yourself and your ability to choose your own destiny?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-fourth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Can I Cross These Bridges? Dreaming vs Doing

I am afraid to do the thing I should do.

Afraid is not actually the correct feeling, however.  At least, not in the face of logic.  Maybe, the more correct thing here is I am concerned about the consequences that would come of my doing the thing I know I should do.

What is the elephant in the room?  My job.

I have a decent, reasonable paying, low-pressure job. The hours are okay.  The commute is generally not problematic.  This job covers our health insurance.

I am bored out of my mind.  Half of the job I was originally hired to do has been given to someone else, and I have almost no work to do in the remaining half.  I have done all the makework I can for it, and I tolerate the majority of my coworkers, but several of them hold majorly opposing political views, and I find them often insufferable.  More than once I have walked away from my desk to avoid getting into a discussion with people who cannot be reasoned with.

Now comes the guilt.  I am employed.  I am making a decent salary.  I want to be grateful for having this job…but I am feeling like my time is being wasted.  And I feel like an asshole because I am so discontent, rather than grateful.

I have been here before.  Frankly, I get here pretty frequently with jobs.  I reach the point where I am feeling no love for what I am doing or where I am doing it, and I will either walk away or lose the job because it gets emotionally overwhelming.

I know lots of people in low-paying jobs.  I know several people without jobs.  I know several people who have truly hateful jobs.  I know people who work for truly awful people.  My situation is not so bad…so how come I want to get out of it as badly as I do?

This is not me.  This is not where I want to be for eight-and-a-half hours of my day, five days a week.

Facing a crisis of conscience.

I know what I should do, but I can’t.  I have bills to pay, responsibilities to uphold, and I know in almost every logical way this would be a mistake to act on that impulse.

Does this make my a hypocrite?  I think it does.  I have been preaching Pathwalking, choosing my own destiny, for five-and-a-half years.  But if I was walking my own path, I would not be in this position, I would not be in this place where I have to choose between the right thing and the right thing.

How’s that?  Well, the right thing for me to do is get out of the situation.  I should leave the job that makes me miserable and take the actions I believe can and will make me money.  Yet, at the same time, I know I should keep the job and the good pay and benefits, and trudge through so I can stay in the black and pay the bills and contribute to my household.

This is and has been my greatest issue.  I simply do not believe sufficiently in my own power.  I talk a good talk, I write all about it…but I simply do not believe it.  Not completely.  I have tried and failed enough times in this life that I am choosing the familiar, the known, the soft and flabby reality I am living in.

There are many questions.

Is this really who I am?  Am I really going to just allow myself to live a life I find dull, lackluster, and half-assed?  Where is my gumption, where is my drive?  I have studied so much and read so many things…how come I still cannot trust my instinct?  Why am I still so skeptical?

I am the only one who can choose my life.  Whatever choices I make will have consequences and repercussions.  In the end, the only person who’s feelings matter in all of this is me.  I am the only one who can feel what I feel, and how I feel.  I am the only one who thinks as I do.  This is wholly and entirely on me.

This is the ultimate challenge of my own belief system.  Do I accept the notion that consciousness creates reality, for real?  Am I able to really, truly embrace this, and work with it to build a life I desire to live far more than this one?

Choices and decisions.

This is the biggest test of faith I have ever faced in my life.  This is where I choose if I want to live a life as is expected of me, or if I will live the life I really want to live.  Do I believe in my own abilities, my own strengths and skills to do this?  Can I walk the walk to match up to the talk?

This is huge.  I have a big question before me, and there is nobody who can answer it, save me.   Do I believe my own hypothesis…or am I just another dreamer who cannot become a doer?  There are no easy answers.  Let’s see what I do with this from here.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 22:

Diet:  I am maintaining a reasonable diet.

Exercise:  I spent Saturday walking all over the place, Sunday doing the same and shooting archery.  I fenced Tuesday, hit the gym Wednesday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on my modern alchemist story one day.

Meditation:  Four days last week, though only 3 minutes on one of those day and less than 10 minutes otherwise.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things four days last week.

 

This is the thirty-sixth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

What are challenges vs struggles with Pathwalking?

Pathwalking can be fraught with many challenges.

I long ago came to believe that nothing worth having is ever easy.  But there is a difference between challenge and struggle.  Challenge involves growth and proactive change, while struggle is stagnation and reactive change.  Challenge is deciding to change, while struggle is forced.

Many of the challenges in Pathwalking are due to outside influences, some which we can control and some which we cannot.  Recognizing this is the first step towards working with it, and keeping challenges from becoming struggles.

Further, when you recognize that you are struggling, it is possible to transmute your struggle into a challenge.  This is where taking control of the matters which you can control comes into play.

What is outside of your control?  Other people, situations that are not of your making, world news and such.  Let’s face it…we live in tumultuous times.  There is a tremendous amount of upheaval and reactionary measures happening because people are either making poor choices or no choices due to fear of change.  We can protest, we can vote more wisely, we can choose where and how to spend our money, but we cannot change these people, their actions or how they think, no matter how badly we want to do that.

What is inside of your control?  Everything that is yours in your life.  Your thoughts, feelings and actions, your situations, your mental state, how you use your time and so on.  You are the only person who can think for you, feel for you, act for you.  Nobody else can make you think, feel or do anything you do not allow yourself to think, feel and do.

We frequently give this away without realizing that we are doing that.  They influenced my thinking and she made me feel that way and I only did that thing because you made me do it.  Easy enough to give that power away, but that is a choice, a decision.  The power is yours, but you get to choose if you will take hold of it, or not.

Looking out for yourself is not selfish.

We live in a society obsessed with polar opposites.  Black and white, rich and poor, conservative and liberal, gay and straight, fat and thin, etc.  We are inundated with choices of either/or, when the truth is most people in every way fall somewhere between extremes.

One of these is the notion that if you are not selfless, you are selfish.  As such, we often find ourselves believing that self-care is selfish, so we neglect it to care for others.  Then we wonder why we are struggling, when we have accepted this notion and let ourselves take a second-rate place in our own lives.

When we do not hold onto things for ourselves, and we do not care for ourselves, we actually take away our ability to give to others.  We have to be full in order to have enough to share, and because this is an abundant universe that is not a selfish notion.  We are all unique individuals, and we all have different needs and wants, but no matter what those may be, we all need to care for ourselves.  Putting yourself first is perfectly fine, so long as you don’t ignore that there is a world apart from yourself.  You are the center of your own world, but you are also a part of rather than apart from the rest of the world. That’s an important distinction to remain clear on.

Choose challenge.  Choose change.

Change is inevitable.  It will happen, because that is part of life and growth.  Even when you are standing perfectly still, the air around you is changed by your body heat and your breath.  That is the nature of all things.  So rather than struggle from resisting change, accept the challenges that may come from change.

The challenges of Pathwalking will be different for everyone.  Things I find simple and easy you may find unbelievably difficult, and vice versa.  I am a thinker, and while I am empathic, I have often struggled to understand people who are true feelers.  However, while I can be logical about my feelings, actually understanding the meanings of my feelings can be difficult for me.  Then there are people who are doers – they take actions with seemingly little thought or feeling going into them, sometimes with extreme wisdom and sometimes less so.

Many of the challenges thinkers, feelers or doers will experience may be similar, but they may also vary rather widely.  The thing is to make the choices and decide to work on challenges we face, rather than to let choices and decisions out of our control, and work on struggles that drain us and disempower us.

Pathwalking is empowering.

Despite challenges and occasional struggles, Pathwalking, ultimately, is empowering.  Choosing your own path means that you are working on deciding how you want life to be.  When we decide this for ourselves, we open ourselves to discovering our happiness, and that, I believe, is the thing we most want to know.

When you are struggling, it is always possible to face it head-on and turn it into a challenge.  It may not be easy, but I believe empowering the self is always worthwhile.  Choosing my own destiny and deciding how I want to be I believe is key to living the best life I possibly can.

What challenges do you work with regularly, and how do you approach them?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-third entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

What it means to Cross the Bridges – Different Aspects of My Writing

I love writing.

I have been writing since I was 9 years old.  Wildfire was sci-fi, 50 hand-written pages long and illustrated by yours truly.  The basic premise: the grown-ups of the world allowed this mad scientist to create robots, who took over everything for everyone.  The adults got fat and lazy, the kids got distraught over this so they rebelled, stole a bunch of military hardware, created a base in the walls of the Grand Canyon, and in time wiped out all the robots and all the adults and were left to their own devices to rebuild the world.

Very few people have seen this, because I wonder what a child psychologist would have had to say about a nine-year-old killing off all the adults?  Also, the illustrations are just awful – my profile views have no noses.  Really.  Oh, and the heads of the robots were modelled off of Commodore PET computers.

From there I wrote a few other stories, like my first typed sci-fi story, The Secret Computer World.  Inspired by Tron, much?  I think so.

From there I wrote a few more things along the way.  But in college I mostly stopped writing.  I have a few scattered bits and pieces, but nothing whole for about 6 years.

Then, in 1998, I began what would evolve into The Source Chronicles.  Since then, I have churned out the first three novels in that series (I am currently working on editing book 3, Harbinger), two Steampunk novels in the Vapor Rogues series, and am currently working on the 4th book in The Source Chronicles, Guardians, and an un-named space opera.

I began this blog back in 2010, but didn’t begin to give it direction until my New Years’ Action for 2012, and the start of Pathwalking.  Since then, it has evolved over the past five-and-a-half years into a more intentional, more focused blog.

Writing in a Different Direction

Back in 2005, I discovered National Novel Writer’s Mo nth (NaNoWriMo), and fell in love with the idea of creating a 50,000 word novelette in 30 days.  My first year’s attempt crashed before I reached half-way, but in 2006 I was encouraged to tell a different story than my norm.

The reason this blog is called The Ramblings of the Titanium Don is due to the car accident I was in on November 30th, 1999.  I was a pedestrian, and I was struck by a car while crossing a relatively busy street.  Part of the damage to my body from that accident was a shattered clavicle, which was repaired using three titanium plates.  As such, I am now made partially of titanium.  Also, in the SCA, I am a Don.  Hence – The Titanium Don.

The story of that accident, as well as my recovery and the next couple of years, is full of unbelievable but completely true happenings.  In hindsight, a great deal of it is actually rather funny.  During a conversation in the parking lot after a fencing practice, I was encouraged to tell this story with my own brand of humor, and use that to participate in NaNoWriMo.

Writing from a Different Perspective

Unlike the vast majority of my non-blog writing, I wrote the novelette in first person.  At the end of November 2006, The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Trip to the Post Office was completed.

I have been loathe to share this tale for a number of reasons.  First – due to many acts on my part in that time, I look like a total ass.  Second – there is some embarrassment around many of the things that occurred then.  Third – despite changing the names of everyone involved, I still worry about offending certain people.  Fourth – this is probably the most personal thing I have ever written, even with the changes to names and certain places within.

Yet those who have read this story have told me it should be shared.  Many have told me it’s one of the best things I have ever written.  As part of my desire to become a best-selling author, even though this is a bridge apart from everything else I write – I am preparing The Journey of a Thousand Miles… for publication.

Talk the Talk, Write the Words, Cross the Bridges

Writing is my passion.  I have said before that I don’t care if I am working on this blog; working on sci-fi and fantasy or Steampunk; writing press-releases or proposals or copy for businesses; I want to be writing because that’s my love.  I lay myself pretty bare in this particular tale, but one of the new directions in my life I am working with is letting go of my fear of success, or failure, and ultimate fear of abandonment from either – and embrace making some much-desired changes.

This is not just writing about crossing bridges, this is stepping up to the span and beginning across.  This is actually, factually taking an intentional action to move forward as I most desire.  It is, without a doubt, both scary and exciting.

Keep watching this space as I take the next steps.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 21:

Diet:  I am doing well with the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday, hit the gym Monday and Wednesday.  Walked a lap around the small lake near work Tuesday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on editing Journey of a Thousand Miles on five days.

Meditation:  Every day over the last week, never less than 8 minutes a day (generally 10 minutes or more).

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things every day last week.

 

This is the thirty-fifth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Why Walk Your Own Path? You Control More Than You Think

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.

This can be a particularly difficult concept to believe, but that doesn’t lessen the truth of it.  You are in control over how you think, how you feel, and how you act.

I know that sometimes it feels like that control is really, really limited.  Truth is, however, that the only limitations are those that you yourself place.  Otherwise, you have far more power and capability to change your life as you would most desire than you probably believe.

I created Pathwalking with the intent of taking control over my life, and creating the destiny I believe I am meant for.  I have long known that the standard courses in life were not for me, and overall I have not taken those particular paths.

One career since college?  Nope, not at all.  I have held numerous jobs, but not followed a single career path until fairly recently.  Marriage in my late twenties or early thirties and raise kids?  Nope, didn’t get married until my early forties, and we’re not going to produce children.  Buy a house, use it to build equity and maintain stability?  While I have been a homeowner, the current plan is to not buy again anytime soon, and rent for the purpose of mobility.

Why am I pointing these out?  Because it is way too easy to let society dictate control over our lives.  We live in a society that discourages us from striking out on our own path, rather than choosing something not-the-normal.  Rather than empower the individual, our society prefers to keep us underfoot, at the whim of our bosses, our religious and political leaders, our supposed superiors.

You are In Charge of You

Nobody is superior to anybody else.  It does not matter if they have more education, more money, more experience or are older than you or more specialized, the only person you answer to, when all is said and done, is you.  The only power anyone else enjoys over you is in place because you have given it away.

That is a particularly hard pill to swallow.  We are so indoctrinated into this idea that other people can control us, that other people can be responsible for our emotions and actions, that we cannot believe this is only true because we allow it to be.  Other people are only able to affect us as much or as little as we allow them to.

For example, let’s say you were in a relationship, but then your partner unceremoniously dumped you.  Yes, you feel hurt, probably betrayed, and upset…but chances are you blame them for hurting you.  They caused you to be hurt, they treated you poorly, and in all likelihood your feelings and opinion of your former partner will only spiral downwards from there.

Yes, it was the action on the part of your former partner that caused those bad feelings.  Yes, it is perfectly normal and totally human to feel hurt, betrayed and upset.  But, you are the one feeling these feelings. As such, you get to choose how long you will hold onto them, and how far along the downward spiral you care to travel.

You are the only one who can feel how you feel.  While there are uncountable outside influences that can and will effect how you feel, you are the only one who actually feels what you feel.  As such, the person who has caused you to hurt only hurts you for as long as you allow them to have that power over you.

Taking another step from here, you and only you are responsible for your actions.  Nobody can make you do anything you do not choose to do.  Yet because our society is so keyed into not being accountable for anything, it is easy to place the blame for bad actions we have taken -outside of ourselves.

Take Back Your Power

When you understand that you are the one in control of your own thoughts, feelings and actions, you get to choose how much of that control to exert.  You will feel upset for as long as you hold onto it, and you will not take an action that is not of your own accord, unless you choose to and blame it on another.  You are the one who gets to decide.  You get to choose.

You will notice over the coming weeks changes to this blog.  I am studying new ideas to improve what I share here, and that means things will be changing.  Since change is inevitable, happens whether we want it or not, I am exerted control over change, and choosing to alter this how I desire the change to be.

Last week I explained how intention is the reality of control.  Intention is composed of thought and feeling and action, and you are the only person who can control all of your thoughts, your feelings and your actions.  Nobody else can choose for you, nobody else can be in control, unless you allow them to be.  You can keep the power over your thoughts, feelings and actions, or you can give it away in part or total.  That is your decision.

Consciousness creates reality.  Recognizing our own control over the vast majority of our lives, we can be empowered to make almost anything we can imagine of them.  We are free thinkers; we are the only ones who feel the things we feel, however we feel them; we are the only ones who can act on our own thoughts and feelings.

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.  When you recognize this, embrace it and see just how endless the possibilities are before you.

What feels out of your control that you can take back for yourself?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-second entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: The Why of my Blog

Why do I blog?

Recently, a webinar I viewed took me to an unexpected place, and I began a course to learn new ways to earn money as a blogger.  I mean, this is something I love rather a lot, so why shouldn’t I be earning a living doing this?

One of the questions the instructor posed is, Why do you blog?  This is an interesting question, and the answer to it caused me to realize that this whole blog is unified, despite three regular, separate topics.

More than five years ago, as a New Year’s Action, I started Pathwalking.  I got this idea for figuring out how I was going to choose my own destiny in life, and start to walk my own path.  Despite not fully accomplishing my goal thus far, Pathwalking has taken me a long ways.  I have gotten better at choosing for myself, and over the past five years my life has taken many dramatic and positive changes.  I am constantly improving upon the premise, which is why I continue to post to Pathwalking weekly.

One Monday morning, about three-and-a-quarter years ago, I encountered a barrage of extreme negativity across Facebook and Twitter and G+, my primary social media outlets.  It was like absolutely everyone I knew was either having a lousy day or expecting to.  I decided that I needed to share something positive, and thus was Positivity born.

Every week I find something positive to write about.  Frequently it’s an abstract concept, but I believe that more often than not these intangibles are the most powerful things to build and sustain positivity.

While I was getting coaching at the start of this year, I decided I needed a third post.  This one would be less in the abstract, and more direct, more personal.  While both Positivity and Pathwalking serve me, they are also broader, more wide-ranging concepts.  Crossing the Bridges, on the other hand, is much more personal.  This is not just the journey in a general sense, this is MY specific journey, MY pathwalk.

Even when I occasionally post about my writing projects or topical, political rants, I am still working on the same concept, the same overall notion.  The Ramblings of The Titanium Don is not just some random, mishmash of ideas and writing, it is, as the new tagline states, exploration of conscious reality creation and other matters.

I frequently state that Consciousness Creates Reality.  This is not an original phrase of mine, my best friend Kristin said it to me years and years ago.  Yet it is, I believe, the truth of how the Universe works, that we can manifest our own destinies, and we can do, have or be pretty much anything we believe we can be.

No, you cannot necessarily become an astronaut if you have neither a science nor military background.  Of course, if you make enough money you could buy a seat on a future Virgin Galactic flight, and viola, you’re an astronaut.  The point to this is that most, if not all of our limitations are wholly in our own minds.

My blog is an exploration of doing more to live the fullest, most interesting life possible.  Both for me, and I hope for you.  The thing is, none of us are alone.  Ever.  We get lonely, we may be sitting in a solitary place without anyone near, but we are still not truly alone.  Despite its ability to disconnect us, the internet and social media and smartphones and their ilk can also be empowering.

One thing I have come to believe is that society strives to disempower us.  When we were children, this was in many ways for our own good.  We needed the education, support and boundaries our parents and teachers set for us, in order to understand how to learn, to grow and change, and to know right from wrong.  Unfortunately, when we reach the point where we should be learning to empower ourselves, society places additional limiting beliefs on who we are, and who we can and should become.

Society expects us to get some form of post-secondary education, or learn a vocation, or just get a job.  We find that if we want to explore the world or follow a band on tour or even start our own business we’ll encounter many, often well-meaning people suggesting that we conform to the norm.

If we do go ahead and conform, we will be inundated with people attempting to disempower us.  Politicians exerting control, religious leaders condemning alternative viewpoints, bosses and even family members working to force our paths to what they think is best of us.  This is why I believe that society at large strives to disempower us.

Why?  Because if we empower ourselves, we won’t need many of the trappings of our society.  We will become more capable of not just coping, but creating bigger and better lives for ourselves.  When more of us are at work doing that, we can and will inspire others to become so empowered.  I believe that we can change the status quo, and consciously create a better reality for everyone.

That is why I blog.  I am working on empowering myself.  As I become more empowered, I want to inspire YOU to become self-empowered, rather than perpetuating our societal disempowerment.  When more of us become aware, and consciously work on creating reality, I am absolutely certain the world we can create together will be amazing beyond our wildest dreams.

Consciousness Creates Reality, and I want to create the best possible reality I can, and help you do that, too.  I have a lot of new work to do.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

Also – please check out my new about page.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 20:

Diet:  I believe that I am doing pretty well with the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Tuesday and Thursday, hit the gym Monday-Wednesday.  Walked a lap around the small lake near work Mon, Tuesday and Thursday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on editing Journey of a Thousand Miles on four days.

Meditation:  Every day over the last week, never less than 8 minutes a day.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things every day last week.

 

This is the thirty-fourth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

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