The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: self-doubt

Are You Kind?

Be kind to yourself.  Give kindness to others.

I am sitting here this morning, trying to come up with words for this post, and I have been doing my usual routine.  I go to Facebook, I play a couple games, and I read through a bunch of posts.

KindThere are a lot of discouraging things going on out there.  So much anger, so much fear, such unbelievable negativity.  Is this really the world we want to live in?

I don’t know about you, but I am not a fan of this.  Of course it’s important to stay informed, but the volume of bad news is just thoroughly distressing.  It overwhelms, and I can’t help but wonder what good, if any, I can do here?

I can be better to myself.  I can treat myself like I want to be treated by others, and then I can extend that out to the people around me.

Positivity this week covered taking one step at a time, while Pathwalking covered the power of tenacity.  I have been having a hard time coming up with a topic for Crossing the Bridges, because I have a lot in my head, and am having a difficult time centering.

Anger and anxiety have been clouding my mind this morning. I am feeling somewhat helpless in the face of all the negativity I have been reading.

It is, of course, ok to feel angry, to feel bad, to get annoyed by these things.  The problem is holding onto them too tightly.  If I allow my feelings to stay here and fester, I will lower my frequency, and I will have an ever-increasingly difficult time getting where I want to go.

Pause.  Breathe.  Refocus.  Most of all…be kind.  I need to be kind to myself.

Being kind is a key to conscious reality creation.

I know that like many people, I am often the least kind to myself.  There is a lot of self-doubt, criticism, uncertainty that crops up in my life.  When I am focused on these things, they cause me to not think so well of myself.  This is not a terribly useful approach to life.

So I need to be more kind to myself.  It’s all well-and-good to be kind to others, but if I do not show myself kindness, then I actually have less to share, too.  Like pretty much everything in the universe, it all starts with the individual.

Consciousness creates reality.  If I am focused on negative things, on unkind things, what do you think I am drawing into my life?  No surprise here – more things I would prefer not to draw to myself.  Thus it’s really important that I remember to treat myself kindly, and to be gentle towards my heart and mind.

When I am more kind to me, I build more ability to be kinder to others.  Positivity begets positivity.  The best way to empower anyone else is to empower myself.

This past month has been rough.  Sure, I can dwell on this…or I can acknowledge it, and strive to make every day a good day.  One step at a time, one day at a time.  Frequently that really is the best approach.

Sometimes the toughest things to do are the simplest.  Self-love and kindness towards self should be really easy.  Yet often, they are the most challenging act to take part of.  It is important to remember that being kind to others is great, but being kind to myself is also extremely important.

Remember that kind acts beget kindness.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me.

 

This is the seventieth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Does Self-Doubt Impact You?

Self-doubt and indecision will complicate Pathwalking.

I strive to be less doubtful about who I am, and to do better with making decisions about my life.  Pathwalking is about choosing for myself, rather than letting random chance just happen.

Yet I still question if I am deserving of this.  I doubt myself, my abilities to do the things I want to do.  This in turn can make me indecisive, and I get stuck in uncertainty.

Self-doubt comes from many places.  Perceived failures, discipline or lack thereof, wrong choices, disproven beliefs, mistakes, miscommunication, and a lack of outside validation.  It is unfortunately easy to blame those outside forces for causing self-doubt, but this is totally an inside job.

If I am doubting myself, then it’s all on me.  The only person inside my head is me.  Nobody else can think for me, unless I give up my free will and let them.

As if that’s not enough of a complication, focusing on the things that I am doubting about myself draws more things.  The self-talk in my head is too negative, and as such not very productive.  I berate myself, see my flaws, get upset with mistakes and missteps and perceived failures too easily.

This complicates Pathwalking, because I get focused on things I don’t want for myself, and then of course that will create more of those.  I get more doubtful, and then get frustrated when I am unproductive, and become distracted because I can’t focus.

Self-doubt is a liar.

This is a hard truth to accept.  Your self-doubt is a lie.  It is that nagging voice in your head telling you that you are unacceptable.  This is the voice saying you are worthless.  It’s the brain weasels running around aimlessly, probably giving you a headache.

When we believe the worst of ourselves, we don’t feel terribly good.  This is where depression is born, and the lying black wolf will make us indecisive about all kinds of things.  You start to question decisions, ideas, plans and goals when you doubt yourself.

Self-doubt may be a wholly internal matter, however its cause can be rooted in outside forces and influences.  When you do not receive validation, whatever form that may take, it can be disheartening.  If you are not recognized for your skills and contributions, you may begin to question your value and worth.

This gets even more complicated when the outside forces are loved ones.  If your own family makes you question your value and worth, it’s hard not to doubt yourself.  When your friends tell you things “for your own good” that might upset you, this too can make you doubtful.  That’s particularly rough when they are questioning your choices, and causing you to question them in turn.

Self-doubt can lead to indecision.

When you doubt yourself, you start to doubt your choices.  You begin to wonder if you are making good choices, or bad choices.  As such, this can lead you to either not make a choice, or to be particularly indecisive.

I have spent a great deal of my life in indecision.  Rather than choose wrong, I either didn’t choose at all, or hmmmed and hawed until I either had no choices remaining, or only one choice available.  I didn’t choose to pursue professional radio after college because I doubted I would be able to build a similar life to that which I had in Podunk, Middle America.  No pursuit of a professional theatre career was every truly initiated by me, because there is huge amounts of uncertainty when it comes to theatre and success.  I didn’t put my focus into turning my writing into a career in my twenties because I listened to those who said that it didn’t pay.

The indecision of my twenties and thirties was fueled by my self-doubt, and unsurprisingly my self-doubt was fueled by my indecision.  Because I spent nearly two decades constantly doubting myself and being indecisive, I did not find financial, career, or relationship successes.  I came to believe that I was a failure, and that I didn’t deserve to succeed because of my mistakes along the way.

I began to believe my own doubts were true.  Maybe I was a failure, maybe I was unworthy of respect.  How could I turn this around and change the dialogue?

Turn self-doubt into self-worth.

I have begun to see now that I am a worthwhile individual.  I contribute to the world around me, helping friends and family and even strangers when I can.  There is worth in what I do, and rather than get hung up on long-term and overarching success, I need to see success in the small things in life.

Often this is still easier said than done.  I am currently striking out on my own to find freelance writing jobs and take my existing work to the next level.  With my desire to be a bestselling author, I am working on finding ways to increase sales of my work, and get myself out there.

Now I have the opportunity to live what I have been writing about for almost six years.  Pathwalking is choosing my own destiny, making choices and deciding to have the life I most want.

Self-doubt is a saboteur.  I know that some days I am going to feel like I am not able to do this, and that I lack the discipline.  I allow those who mean well but say upsetting things to get inside my head; negative news well outside my control impacts my thoughts.  This needs to be acknowledged because it is there, and unavoidable.  But, once I have done that, I need to them proceed to let it go.

I am capable of anything I set my mind to.  I need to be bold, make decisions, and not let my self-doubt interfere with the paths I am walking.

What do you do when faced with self-doubt and indecision?

 

This is the two-hundred ninety-eighth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Please take a moment to subscribe to this blog!  Even if you have done so before, there is new material, and a gift with your subscription.

How Awesome Are You?

You are awesome.  Yes, I am talking to YOU.

We are not told frequently enough how incredible we are.  You are awesome.  For real, you are an amazing, incredible person, and you have a lot to offer to this world.

Self-doubt has the unfortunate power of stopping us from becoming what we want to be.  Some of the doubt is due to outside influences, but the majority is on each and every one of us.  We are our own worst enemies and harshest critics.

It’s easy to question the choices we have made.  Society is pretty judgmental, so it doesn’t take much to view the verdicts of those around us as our own.

I have made choices that were less-than stellar.  Decisions were made and not made that have placed me in my life where it is now.  I am a master of doubting myself, and I allow my doubts to manifest into fears.  When doubt becomes fear, guess what happens?  Yup, I sabotage myself and continue to build up more and more doubt.

How many of you do the same thing?

Don’t doubt how awesome you are.

You are an incredible person.  No matter what errors you have committed, what mistakes you have made, you are awesome.  You are the one and only you that there is.  When we each accept ourselves for how awesome we truly are, we can move mountains and create amazing things.

Consciousness creates reality.  When we focus on our doubts and perceived shortcomings, guess what we tend to create more of?  Reasons to doubt and see our shortcomings.  Focus instead on how awesome you are, and all that you care capable of.  When we do this, we generate incredible positivity, and that in turn makes us happier.

Positivity - How Awesome Are You?Do you want to be happy in this life?  I do.  Look, the world is imperfect.  Some is the result of people and their various machinations.  Some are nature, as in nobody can be blamed for the hurricane ravaging Texas.  What matters is that we take our awesomeness and use it to do good and offer necessary resistance to our fear-based society.

Don’t doubt how awesome you are.  I believe in you.  I may not be anyone of consequence in your life, but if I believe in you, shouldn’t you be able to believe in yourself?  Do not doubt how awesome you are.  Know that YOU are awesome!

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.

Knowing that you are awesome, you can let go of your self-doubt and use your awesomeness to manifest an amazing life.  When we let go of our self-doubt and recognize how awesome we are, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred eighty-seventh entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

Please take a moment to subscribe to this blog (even if you’ve done so before – new service set up!), and receive your bonus content.

 

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén