The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: personal (Page 2 of 17)

Pathwalking 280

Balancing living in the now with our overall perception of time is an interesting challenge.

As I concluded last week, I have been thoroughly indoctrinated into the societal obsession with time, and my work to withdraw from that perception is a challenge.  But because I desire to consciously create the reality I most want to have, I am doing anything and everything I can think of to more regularly live in the here and now.

What tools do I have to employ for this process?  That is the question.  Like many such things in life, this is a matter of trial and error.  No one of these works entirely by itself, it is combinations of these I strive to employ as warranted.  Different actions at different times will produce different effects.

What does that mean?  What that means is that while the goal is rather objective, the process is almost entirely subjective.  Situation, mood, weather, location, and all kinds of other factors are going to be a part of when and where tools can be applied.  Some are passive, some are active.

Let’s start with the most active tools.

Meditation.  When I meditate, I bring myself totally into the moment.  Not only am I in the here-and-now while meditating, I also get to connect directly to source energy.  The Powers-that-Be are most readily accessible, because I shut out the world around me and work to be present and still.

This does not require a lot of time, but of late I have been striving for 10 minutes or more per day.  Yet even taking 5 minutes a day can do a body good.

There are several ways to practice meditation.  My preferred method is to sit cross-legged, back against a wall, eyes closed and focused on my breathing.  I like to have some form of white-noise in the background, usually a flowing stream or ocean waves.  I put my attention on my breathing, slowing it as best I can…and when random thoughts flit about like squirrels in my brain I work on not grabbing ahold of them, but refocusing on my breathing.

Other ideas for meditation include visualizing connecting to some sort of internal or external energy source.  Or if you prefer not to close your eyes, focus on a single point, allowing yourself to drift.  Meditation is the ultimate tool to put yourself in the here-and-now.

Exercise.  Whether I lift weights, use an elliptical, walk around a lake, or attend fencing practice, exercising is a great means to put myself into the here-and-now.  I am doing something that is good for the body, which in turn is good for the soul.  Exercise changes breathing, changes heart rate, and frequently puts me in the moment.

Even fifteen minutes of exercise is good for you, while twenty to thirty is scientifically proven to be really beneficial.

Both meditation and exercise also can put you into the zone, or the void, or what Musashi called the “Place of No Mind”.  That is the space where you are entirely in the moment, enfolded within perfect harmony, where time loses meaning and you can almost see and feel everything in slow-motion.  This is the ultimate expression of being wholly in the here-and-now.

More passive tools include:

Questions.  I work to ask myself, several times a day, How Am I?  What am I thinking?  What am I feeling?  Am I thinking about things ahead of me, or in the now?  Am I feeling abundant?  Just asking these questions causes me to be aware, and awareness draws me into the present.  I write out my answers between three and five times a day.

Mantras and Affirmations.  Having a simple mantra, no more than a word or two, and repeating it several times a day opens awareness, and places you in the present.  Similarly, a longer affirmation can have the same effect.  The difference between these, as I understand it, is that a mantra is more general and over-arching, like Abundance or Om or Peace or Love and so forth.  Affirmations are more direct and specific statements, like I am a money magnet or I am a successful writer who inspires and empowers people.  Saying these, reading these places you in the present, which then allows you the best opportunities to successfully manifest whatever you are seeking.

Take time for yourself.  Get offline.  Step away from your desk.  Leave your mobile devices behind.  Go somewhere you can be entirely by yourself, preferably somewhere you can breathe deep and collect your thoughts.  Modern society keeps us constantly connected to one another, but this actually serves to distract and isolate us more than truly connect us.  Getting lost online or playing a game or conversing via text with a friend can be a nice distraction, but actually serves to mask our awareness.  It is not, in my opinion, dissimilar to using alcohol or opiates to mask pain.

I am not saying it’s not good to have occasional distractions.  It is important, however, to be aware of what they are, and the difference between awareness of the here-and-now and distraction.

Time is not our enemy.  Time is not a ravenous wolf that will one day catch us and destroy us.  Time is not against us.  Time is not beating us down…unless we choose to let it.  Time is only linear if we perceive it as such.  Living more in the here-and-now can help us escape the societal obsession with linear time, and when we better see that time is an illusion, we gain an incredible tool to allow us to consciously create reality.

We have plenty of tools to choose from, and we get to choose when and how to employ them.  How do you most frequently perceive time?

 

This is the two-hundred eightieth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas and my personal experiences in walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: Empathy and Feeling Joy

Feeling joy has been something of a challenge of late.  I am an empath.  As an empath, I constantly feel the emotional states of other people around me.

What does that mean?  It means when many, many of my friends and loved ones are feeling anxious because of, oh, say, awful acts of inhumanity on the part of our government…I get not only my own anger, frustration and dismay over what is happening, but also all of theirs as well.

I need to let go of that.  Don’t get me wrong, I am in no way stating that any of us should not be angry over terrible happenings.  Anger can lead us to action.  The key is to do exactly that – take that negative energy, take that emotion and use it to do something useful.

Yes, I am aware that anger leads to the dark side of the force…but I interpret that thus: if I use my anger over an atrocity to commit another atrocity, that’s bad.  If I use my anger to build something positive, that’s good.  More topically, I can take my anger and go online and create memes calling various congresspeople out over their lack of compassion…OR I can find and support someone to stand with in order to replace them in the next election.

The point of this is that, yes, it’s ok, and totally human, to experience and feel negative emotions.  But in order to consciously create a better reality, we can’t hold onto them, we can’t draw power from them.  Focusing on what we don’t want only brings more of that out.  We have to release the negative in some way, so that we can focus instead on the things we DO want, in order to work to draw those to us.

Sometimes releasing the negativity is easier than others.  It gets particularly complicated when I am inundated by the emotions of people around me, whether it’s overt or seething.  Being an empath, I am keenly aware of the emotional states of those around me, and doubly so my loved ones and friends.

Now the irony of all of this is that, while an empath all my life, for decades I didn’t do so well with expressing my own emotions.  This could become a long and complicated tale about my childhood and various things that happened in my youth which caused me to close myself off, but I spent years in therapy to cope with that.  It’s also really important to note that I do not blame anyone else for these issues…I recognized them, I took responsibility for them being mine, and have been working on changing them.

Point is, once I learned how to feel these emotions for myself, which I could only previously sense in others, I had to learn how to recognize what belonged to me, and as such I gained key insight into the actual meaning of the emotions in question.  This could turn into a serious digression, but that will totally deviate from the point.

Joy is an expression of love.  Love is the ultimate generator of positive energy.  That positive energy is the key to raising my vibration, and with that to crossing the various bridges between my worlds, and manifesting the life I most desire to live.

I want to do things that will bring me more joy.  I want to write, I want to be outdoors in the sunlight when I can, I want to read, I want to exercise and not be confined to a nine-to-five gig that might pay my bills, but bores me to tears.  I want to spend more time with my wife, my loved ones, my friends, my cats, my hobbies.  I want to go for drives with the radio blasting as I sing along to my vast collection of 90’s rock, Barenaked Ladies, and Broadway Showtunes.  Yes, really, my musical tastes are pretty eclectic.

When the emotions of others feed my own negative emotions, it takes a lot of effort to push through, to refocus on positives, to take actions that will help me go where I want to go and do what I want to do.  I have to pause, I have to take a deep breath, and I have to fight the desire to curl up in a ball and whimper piteously or scream in rage.  I am the only one who can control MY emotions, and I need to assert that control unless I want them to control me.

Acknowledge the good, the bad and the ugly.  Hold onto the things that empower, and find release for those that do not.  When they are not my own emotions I am catching onto, I need to also accept those feelings, but equally release them in the ways I would release my own.  I am aware of how this works.

Human beings are complicated creatures.  We are unique in our ability to create incredible, globe-shaping (and wrecking) tools; adaptation to nearly every conceivable environment; ability to grow and learn; potential to live small or large, and perform a wide range of activities for our basic and advanced survival.  We don’t just eat, sleep, reproduce and cycle with nature, we can shape it however we like.

We are empowered to do, be, or have pretty much anything and almost everything we can conceive of.  The key is to think, to feel, and to take inspired and intentional actions.  Some days are more challenging than others, but every day we can choose anew.

You and I have more power than we realize.  When we are able to feel joy we can use that to raise our vibrational energy, and when our frequency is higher we can accomplish almost anything we want to.

I will feel the feelings, mine and those of others, but I will strive to only hold onto those which can empower me.  No matter what is happening, here and now I am alive and well, and my potential is pretty amazing.  I feel for you and what you are going through…and you are also alive, here and now, and your potential is equally as amazing as mine.

Let’s do this.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 18:

Diet:  I am still doing pretty well with the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Saturday, Tuesday and Wednesday.  Walked a lap around the small lake near work one day, did a good workout at the gym one day.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, worked on editing Harbinger a couple days, and even did some writing in my sci-fi epic.

Meditation:  Every day over the last week, one day for 7 minutes, one day 8 minutes, otherwise 12-15 minutes a day.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things every day last week.

 

This is the thirty-second entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Pathwalking 279

Finding the balance between living in the now and setting goals for the future is uniquely challenging.

Pathwalking is about taking control of your destiny, and making choices along the path of life to manifest what you want from it.  This is not just living life come-what-may, like so many people do, but instead making decisions, making choices about raising your vibrational energy, and manifesting a life you want to live.

Why bother?  Because I don’t know about you, but I want to wake up in the morning excited to face my day.  I want to enjoy every moment of my day, not spend long periods of it wishing I were elsewhere, or doing something else, or being someone I am currently not, but could still become.  We are here in this reality to learn, to grow, to be the most we can be.

While one can certainly take an aimless journey along a given path, having a goal gives us a reason, gives us a purpose, gives us something to strive for.  Maybe it will make us better, maybe it will make us more abundant, but ultimately it’s probably something that will make us happy.

Yet, in order to get from here to there, it’s insanely important to live in the now.  While this may seem like a contradiction, it’s actually the key to success.

Let’s go with my goal.  I intend to be a best-selling author.  Great, I have the goal at the end of my path.  Now, here and now, what thoughts, feelings and actions can I take to get to that goal?  It is important I do not neglect the present, because this is where I am; yet it’s equally important that I do not get lost in the past, hashing over matters that I wanted to change or do differently.

Time is relative.  Einstein taught us that time is illusionary, and that our perception of it is unique to ourselves.  I got into this further in a recent Crossing the Bridges.  However, current reality is the product of past thought, feeling and action.  That’s simply the way it works, we are who we are based on how we thought, what we felt and how we acted before now.

To get to where we desire to be in the future, it’s important to be aware of how we are thinking, feeling and acting in the now.  This will allow us to direct our energy, to raise vibrational frequency, and to consciously create our desires.  The past is past, simple as that, and only by working with awareness here and now can we affect the outcome for the future we wish to manifest.

BUT, of course, the danger is focusing on that future and neglecting the present.  If you lose touch of where you are RIGHT NOW, because you are focusing on the outcome, life continues to live you, and you give control away.  Your subconscious can create your reality, but chances are you will not get what you most want.  This is why awareness, consciousness of here and now, is the key to manifesting the desired outcome.

Yes, we need to learn lessons from the past, because those who do not study history are doomed to repeat it.  Yes, we need to visualize the future as if it’s already here, but that is not about daydreaming as much as bringing the idea into your awareness, HERE AND NOW, to make it part of your consciousness.  Once we think and feel the desired outcome as though it is already a part of our here and now, a part of our current awareness, then we give it the vibration and energy to consciously create reality as we most desire it.

That’s crazy, right?  Except by living in the now, while envisioning the desired outcome in the future ALSO in the now, we empower our potential, and increase the energy needed to consciously create just that.  That is, of course, what Einstein was talking about.  When we understand, really understand, that time is wholly based on our individual perception of it, we get to choose to take control of it, or be a victim of it.

We frequently blame time for lack, for limitation, for failure.  But time is an illusion.  Any lack and limitations we put on time are entirely of our own doing.  Which means we have the power to choose for ourselves how best to use time.

One major issue in all of this is society.  Our society is absolutely obsessed with linear time.  Our entire culture frequently gets hyper-focused on matters of linear time, so much so that we have created precision atomic clocks in order to measure its’ passing.   We are always looking at time in straight lines, viewing yesterday, examining tomorrow, calling ourselves too old or too young, saying we are running out of time, time marches on, and so on and so forth.  Is it any wonder we are so easily distracted from living in the now?

Here’s the real kicker in all of this.  I do not know the best way to live in the now.  I have been thoroughly indoctrinated into the societal obsession with time, and my work to withdraw from that perception is a challenge.  But because I desire to consciously create the reality I most want to have, I am doing anything and everything I can think of to more regularly live in the here and now.

What tools do I have to employ for this process?  That is a question I will examine further next week.

Do you live in the past, future or present most frequently?

 

This is the two-hundred seventy-ninth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas and my personal experiences in walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: Time

We are obsessed with time.

Time factors into our lives in ways we hardly pay attention to, but there it is.  We are constantly exploring matters of time, events, dates, appointments, past, present, future, and on and on.  Time is everywhere, and we are frequently coping with a perceived shortage or overage of it.

Why am I going on about this?  Because I am sitting here, spending my time doing nothing.  On the plus side, as I write this, I am getting paid to do nothing.  Some people might tell me I am looking a gift horse in the mouth, and I should take more advantage of this situation.

However, my own moral code makes me feel rather guilty about that.  Not a useful emotion, guilt.  But I do not like taking money from people when I am not really doing any work for them.  Sure, I do work when it comes my way, but otherwise, what do I do with my time?

Here I am, in this office, killing time before I go to somewhere else for my “lunch” break; I will spend half an hour taking a walk or reading, making some productive use of time; then I will return to the office, and if I have little work still I will continue killing time before I go home where I have some time to spend having dinner with my wife before I go to fencing practice.

I am perceiving much of this as time being wasted, misspent, abused.  And yet…those paychecks every-other week really make life much sweeter.  But I have a certain level of work ethic, and would much rather be doing things related to my job while at my job, then spending time feeling as if my self-worth is irrelevant.

This is a matter of perception, I know.  I see this a certain way not everyone might agree with.  All of us mark time in our own manner.  We all have different values of time, and our perception of time well spent versus time wasted or time misused or time saved vary wildly.  Einstein told us long ago now that time is an illusion.  “The only reason for time is so that everything doesn’t happen at once.” – Albert Einstein.

We are all painfully aware that our time in these bodies is limited.  While our beings are made of energy, this particular consciousness, this perception of reality, this body will only exist for (hopefully) the better part of a century.  In the grand cosmic scheme of time, that’s not long.

This is why, when we perceive time as past, present and future, short and long, abundant and lacking, light and dark, good and bad – and every single possibility between these extremes – we allow ourselves to obsess about it.

While I have not been successful this week in getting to the gym in the morning, I have been meditating daily.  I find that the time I take to meditate is really helpful, and gives me focus and clarity and calm…for a little while.  The trick with this now will be to carry it with me.

The questions before me in regards to my current situation are thus:  How do I make the most of my time?  Where is my personal ethical, responsible line in regards to how I use the time I have?  How can I turn the feelings of wasting time, killing time, or any other negative sense of time into a positive?  How is any of this doable?

That’s the biggest question of them all.  How do I do this?  I do not know a process nor a procedure to alter my perceptions of, and obsession with, time.  Since I do not have the option, just now, of being somewhere not right here, what will help me to not feel negative about the measure of time I am here for?

If I have any answer at all to the questions I am posing, it’s this:  I need to adjust my focus.  I need to keep to the end goal.  I want to be a best-selling writer.  I need to focus on what it will feel like to be somewhere other than here, doing something I want to be doing, and making the most of my time, rather than feeling like time is slipping away.  Time, like the universe, is made of abundance.  If I perceive lack, I get lack.  Perceive abundance, get abundance.

It always seems to come back to this same thing, doesn’t it?  Abundance.  I need to do better at focusing on and seeing abundance in my life.  It’s not just about love and money and space and peace, but also time.  I need to see that there is more than enough time, and not time wasted, abused, or lacking.  Focus.

Think.  Feel.  Act.  Ask.  Believe.  Receive.  Abundance.  Think and act abundant.  Feel and ask for abundance.  Believe and receive abundance.  It might seem like hooky-spooky mumbo-jumbo BS, but if consciousness truly creates reality – and I thoroughly believe that it does – then I know what it is I should do.

Do or Do Not.  There is no try!” – Yoda.

Have I got this?  Only time will tell…however that time is perceived by me.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 17:

Diet:  Still continuing with the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, took a walk around the lake Thursday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done.

Meditation:  Five days last week, one day for 6 minutes, otherwise 9-14 minutes a day.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things five of seven days last week.

 

This is the thirty-first entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Pathwalking 278

Breaking the routine is hard.

When you have set up habitual ways of doing things, it is tremendously difficult to change them.

We don’t recognize all of our habitual behaviors as habits.  When we think of habits, we think of things like smoking and drinking and chewing off our fingernails and so on.  But any routine we do on a regular basis is a habit.

Oftentimes, when we get stuck on the path we are trying to traverse, or having issues with conscious reality creation, we need to identify and change bad habits.

The thing is, “bad” is a relatively subjective term.  Many of the habits we deem as bad are extremes.  Many of our other habits that are bad are simply unhealthy, unproductive, often poor behaviors that sabotage our progress or hold us hostage in some way.

I have been working on changing my morning routine.  I want to get to the gym.  I have started to get up earlier, and set the coffee maker on a timer every night.  I have been working to shift away from my old routine of get up, make coffee, go online, putter about for an hour or two, then go to work.

Breaking from routine is challenging.  There is often comfort in routine.  Like an old bathrobe you luxuriate in, routine is soft and familiar and safe.

Many of the self-help themed books I have read and listened to describe how, to make changes and get where you want to be in life, you have to get uncomfortable.  You need to do things that are not the norm, that break your routines and patterns and create new behaviors and habits.

I need to step berating myself and using poor self-talk when I do not reach the goal I am setting.  I need to let every day stand all on its own, because then the next day has the potential it needs to be different, and to represent the changes I need and want to make.

Pathwalking is about choice.  I have chosen a path I want to take.  However, more than just choice, I also have to look at what I do from day to day along the way.  If, as I frequently have written, the journey is as important, if not more important, than the destination…then every action while on the journey should not be ignored, and needs to be considered.

Pathwalking is not easy.  There are days I face my choices and become flustered, uncertain, even displeased and distressed.  Why am I doing this?  How come this is taking so long?  Why doesn’t this seem to be working?  Will I ever run out of questions?

Life is all about learning.  I am learning new things every single day.  There is always something new to learn, something more to understand and to discover.  Quite probably the best way to learn is to ask questions.  Questions bring us awareness, and awareness is key to conscious reality creation.

As I write this, I am perfectly aware that I am feeling frustrated.  I am not where I want to be, and I cannot see how or when this situation might change.  I am feeling blah, feeling defeated, tired, distressed and unhappy.  I am questioning many things about my existence, and I am not seeing answers.

Yet I know that I need to persist, to break through this moment.  I can choose to let this negative feeling linger, or I can seek out a means by which to overcome it.  I can wallow in self-pity and annoyance over not making the change to my habits I want, or I can move past it, and I can shift my focus to positive things.

I am affected by weather.  Grey skies tend to bring down my mood.  I am affected by politics.  I cannot even begin to describe the largely negative emotions I feel over the current situation in the USA and elsewhere.  I am, like everyone else, affected by the world around me.

Like working to change my habits, I get to choose whether to allow these outside influences to dominate my thoughts and feelings…or to acknowledge them, find a healthy means to release them, and then move on.  Maybe I need to type out a long and angry rant about things…maybe I need to find a punching bag to beat.  Maybe I need to scream and shout and push out the negative feelings.

If I am not succeeding at making change, I need to acknowledge that, then work on letting it go.  Once I release it, and only after I release it, I can work to build something better.

Breaking the routine is hard.  Life is generally made up of many different routines, so imbedded in our days that we seldom even see them.  Getting free of them is tricky, because first you have to see them for the ineffectual habits that they are.  Then, you can’t hold onto the ways they make you feel bad if you want to change them.  You have to find a way to release, to let them go…and then you can move forward.

We all have good days and bad days.  The challenge is allowing negativity to linger and continue to bring us down…or to find release, and seek out better.  Breaking the routine is a challenge, but I believe the end result, even if I cannot currently see it, will be totally worthwhile.

What routines do you need and want to break in your life?

 

This is the two-hundred seventy-eighth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas and my personal experiences in walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: Nothing to Fear

Fear is like an obscuring mist, covering each step in uncertainty.

Doubt, uncertainty, dis-ease, discomfort, anxiety are all specific manifestations of fear.  Worst of all, they come from a most intangible and illusive fear.

I have written quite a lot about fear.  Both for Pathwalking and Positivity and even amongst my topical rants, fear is a subject I come back to rather frequently.  Why?  Because fear is one of the most pervasive driving forces of our modern society.

Those in power, or striving to obtain power, use fear constantly.  Fear of the unknown, fear of outsiders, fear of the rich, fear of the poor, fear of anyone with a different sense of gender or religion or sexual preference.  Fear is how they disempower you and I while they empower themselves, and provide false empowerment to their direct followers and believers.

Crossing bridges, or doing anything that involves working consciousness for creation, can be easily derailed by fear.  More often than not it’s subtle, almost invisible.  But that does not lessen it.  Nor does that properly express the negative effect it can have on me and my psyche.

I want to be a best-selling author.  Do you know how many people will tell me that I am crazy for wanting that?  Do you know how often I have read about or been told that writers seldom make a living just by writing?  Worse, my primary genre is sci-fi and fantasy.  Niche audiences are an even harder sell.  Madness.

This of course stirs up all kinds of fears that get in the way of my conscious reality creation process.  I get the thought part mostly settled, but the feeling?  Really hard to maintain the necessary positivity to set-up the vibration for manifestation when fear draws me dawn.

I doubt.  I question my own sanity.  Then I start to look at my job history, and feel bad about my career choices or lack of career choices, and I question my talent and abilities and become increasingly frustrated which makes me feel down and…oh, look at that!  I am still not making the kind of money I want, nor doing a job I really want to do, and spend far too much of my time wanting but not working on that want.

Fear is a swarm of gnats.  You can swat them away, you can douse yourself in bug repellant, but they always seem to follow you, get in your ears, drive you slightly mad.

But eventually you will escape the gnats.  This is also true of fear.

I have mentioned in other posts that everything I fear is intangible.  I fear failure, I fear success, I fear most of all being rejected and abandoned because of fear of success or becoming someone nobody wants to know anymore.  Reasonable?  Not even a little bit.  Fear, like matters of the heart, is seldom reasonable.

Last week I discussed taking the first step, and that was putting the thought out, all by itself, and working with it and not overthinking or overanalyzing it.  I want to be a bestselling author.  Next step is feelings.  This is where fear has crept up on me, and begun nagging.

I am working on feeling what it will be like to be a bestselling author.  What will I feel when I am seeing the amazing number of books I have sold and the number of people I have reached?  How will it feel to know I am making my living from this?  And more.  But then I am met with other, nagging thoughts intruding on these questions.  Are you really a good enough writer to become a best-seller?  Do you think your work is that good?  Do you really believe you can make money as a writer?  Shouldn’t you choose a more stable career path finally?

How do I overcome my doubt, my self-depreciation, my fear?  That’s the ultimate challenge for me.  I have taken any number of steps and combinations of steps to address this.  Better diet, exercise, meditation, affirmations, writing out statements of abundance, visualizing, Prozac.  I am constantly trying out different combinations of all of the above.

My toolbox for coping and adjusting my emotions is full of variable implements.  The challenge is figuring out where and how to use them most effectively.  I feel, for the first time in my life, like I am really, truly on the cusp of manifesting the reality I most desire.  Despite issues with the world at large, I believe I can get where I want to go, and fear will not stop me.

Isn’t this a crazy ride?  But that, of course, is life.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

Bonus thought.  One of the all-time best quotes on the topic of fear and coping with fear, after FDR’s “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” is the Litany Against Fear from Frank Herbert’s Dune:

“I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

I will face my fear.

I will permit it to pass over me and through me.

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.

Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

 

GOAL LOG – Week 16:

Diet:  I am continuing with the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Tuesday, took a good 20+ minute Monday, and hit the gym Tuesday and Wednesday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done, and I did some editing on Harbinger over 2 days.

Meditation:  Two days last week, for no less than 4 minutes.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things six of seven days last week.

 

This is the thirtieth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Pathwalking 277

Give up, change tactics, start over, or keep pushing on?

Everybody experiences points where you realize that you have to choose.  Give up the path you are on, change tactics for your approach to it, start a new approach to the path from the beginning, or keep pushing as you are.

This can be a loaded issue, because there are pros and cons to all four options.  Only you can decide which is going to be best in the given situation.

I am not a fan of giving up.  I often feel that giving up is telling the Universe, ok, fine, you win.  I am obviously barking up the wrong tree here, so I quit!  Giving up is not surrendering to the Universe to let things happen, giving up is admitting and accepting defeat.  You came, you saw, you tried, and you are done.

That’s not to say that, sometimes, it is necessary to give up.  Maybe you realize that this path you have chosen is NOT the right one for you.  Maybe you have a new view or opinion, and you just cannot see this to its conclusion.  Maybe this path is simply wrong for you.  Giving up is loaded down with negative connotations, but sometimes this is the best response.  Sometimes you just have to admit, yes, I chose poorly or I have had enough of this or the likeThe key to avoiding the negativity of giving up is making a new effort immediately after.

Rather than give up, there are other options.  Changing tactics is looking at the path you are on, how you are traversing it, and recognizing that, perhaps, this is not working.  Is it the path itself, or the way in which you are traveling it?  This is where changing tactics comes into play.

It is easy to forget the importance of the journey itself.  We live in a society that is all-but obsessed with achieving goals.  Yet frequently during the course of the journey itself, we are likely to make all kinds of new and unexpected discoveries.  This can be of tremendous value to our given paths.

Very few paths are straights and obstacle-free.  Most twist, turn, double back, have bumps and detours and boulders along the way.  Along the course of the path itself there are always new discoveries to be made.  When, in the process of travelling a given path, we see that it is too strewn with obstacles, we might need to change the tactic for walking this path.

How do you change tactics mid-path?  The approach changes.  You may have been going at it from one angle, but now you see you need to try another angle. You may have been working on a frontal assault, now you realize you need to approach from the flank.  You may have been using a boat to sail the steam, now you need an ATV to cross the rocky shoreline the stream ended at.  Same path, new tactic for approaching it gets employed.

Sometimes you have come a long way down your path, and you reach a point where you realize you need to either quit or change your tactics.  But there are times when simply changing tactics is likely to produce the same result, and you are still completely certain of this path you have chosen, so quitting is not an option.

Maybe you need to start over.

There is a difference between starting over, and choosing a wholly new path.  Starting over is working with the same end goal in mind, but rather than remain on the path you chose in the beginning, you start over.   You reach this point when you know with certainty that this is the path you desire, but you see that you need to begin it all over.

One way to look at this is like looking at dealing with getting lost.  Sometimes when you get lost, and you are still attempting to go somewhere you want to go, you go back to the beginning and start again.  Maybe you choose a different tool to help you get from where you are beginning to the end goal than you chose before.  Maybe you walk instead of drive, fly instead of swim or similar.  Same path you have been traversing, but now you start all over, and change how you trek upon it.

And then, from time to time, you decide that your best course of action is to just keep pushing on.  You may consider giving up, you might think about changing your tactics, you might consider if you need to start over…but determine you are going where you need to, how you want to, and you should keep pushing on.

This will often keep us from quitting when it gets hard or deciding to mess up what we’ve already accomplished by beginning anew or changing our tactics.  The pitfall of this, of course, is continuing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result.

All of these choices are perfectly valid.  The key to making them, and any decision in regards to Pathwalking, is clarity.  It begins with thought, which gets transmitted to feeling, and from there actions are taken.  Thought is the first step on the path, feeling is the next, action the next, repeat as necessary.

Give up, change tactics, start over, or keep pushing on?  You alone know what will work for you, and so long as you keep your mind as clear of negativity as you can, and you stay focused, you cannot choose wrong.  And somehow, even if you do, you can make new choices and seek and travel new paths.

What will you do when you reach that point of choice on one of your paths?

 

This is the two-hundred seventy-seventh entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas and my personal experiences in walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: Taking Steps

Crossing the bridges is only possible when you start taking steps.

I intend to become a best-selling author.  While I write several different things in different genres, one of the intents of this particular blog is determining better ways to traverse bridges between these writing styles.

However, in many respects, the first bridge I need to cross is between the life I currently have to the life that I actually want to have.

I have written it before, and I will surely write it again (and again and again): Consciousness Creates Reality.  I need to be fully and completely aware of my present reality.  From here, I need to THINK about what it is I desire from my life.  Then I need to FEEL what it will feel like to have that particular desire.  Once I have thought of it, and felt it, I have to take ACTION to set the ball rolling.

The first step is not the action.  The first step is the thought.  And it needs to be more than just a random, half-formed thought…it needs to be a fully realized idea.

I think this is where I manage to get hung-up.  I have this concept, this half-baked notion in my head, or the start of what I think could be a really cool something, but then rather than clarify and congeal and allow the thought to take on its full, complete and ultimate form I jump ahead.

I wonder if I do ‘x’ if it will get me to ‘y’?  If I do this, then add this, then do this I will get the result!  Maybe in addition to this idea I need to work out how that will work…and so on, and so on.  I jump multiple steps ahead, try and work out multiple results and alternatives and hows and whys and only sort-of step forward.

The thought needs to be whole and complete.  I want to be a best-selling author.  One, simple, complete and whole thought, right there.  The trouble I often engage in is over-thinking it.  But in order to become a best-selling author I will need to do this.  But to do this, I might need to do that?  What if I do the other thing here instead…see the circular logic problem here?

We humans have a maddening tendency to over-complicate EVERYTHING.  We reject the simple in favor of the massively-analyzed, and apply that to just about anything you can think of.  Yes, this has allowed us to unravel the mysteries of the cosmos, to unlock amazing scientific secrets and create some fantastic things.  Yet at the same time, we have come to tune-out the instinctual, to disregard the signs and signals the rest of the animal kingdom relies on, and to require massive study and then proof of concept to achieve most things.

Consciousness creating reality is a simple matter.  One of the reasons we often do not use it is because we have come to accept that simple is not only simple, but also foolish.  Yet simplicity and a lack of intellect are not necessarily one-in-the-same.  Simple in this context is a synonym for uncomplicated or straightforward, not for uninformed or idiotic.

The Universe is abundant.  Don’t believe it?  Despite anything you perceive yourself lacking at this moment, consider what it takes for you to BE.  The incredible number of components, tangible or intangible, that were brought together to make you into you.  Only in an abundant universe could that be accomplished.

The simple thought of I want to be a best-selling author is enough.  I need to hold onto that thought, let it really take root in my consciousness; let it percolate all on its own.

It is upon this one thought, and this one thought alone I need to create feeling.  How does this, the thought of being a best-selling author, make me feel?  What will I feel when I am seeing the amazing number of books I have sold and the number of people I have reached?  How will it feel to know I am making my living from this?  How will it feel to partake of the ancillary aspects of being a best-selling author, like going to Cons and such?  I need to really FEEL these things, and more than that…visualize them.  I need to make them feel as real and solid as I possibly can.

I often get so caught up in trying to work out how, I never get clearly from the basic idea to the next step.  I need to feel this out, but when I get all caught up in thought I frequently am unable to feel the feeling.  Knowing this, I have a new template to work from.

First step is pure, simple thought.  In my case, it’s I want to be a best-selling author.  Next step, feel the feelings of my accomplishment.  The next step after that will be action…and from the uncomplicated thought to the deep, visualized feelings I should be able to identify an inspired, intentional action to take.  That of course would be the next step in the process.  But I need to remember that the solid thought is, in fact, the real FIRST step.

Crossing the bridges is only possible when you start taking steps.  Yet the steps need to be with purpose and intent to accomplish a given goal.  The question is, will I now put this notion to good use to get where I want to be?

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 15:

Diet:  I have continued the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Tuesday, took a good 20+ minute Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done.

Meditation:  Three days last week, for no less than 4 minutes.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things every day last week.

 

This is the twenty-ninth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Pathwalking 276

Writing makes me feel good.

It doesn’t seem to matter what I write.  It can be words for business, it could be web content, it could be this blog, or it could be my next great work of fantasy.  Whatever it is, writing grounds me, centers me, makes me feel good and opens the channels of creative energy.

Not everyone is a writer.  But everyone has a thing, or even more than one thing, that produces this sort of feeling.  We all have actions available to us that will help us to feel good when we are feeling down or otherwise negative; we all have actions that provide us comfort.

Unfortunately, we frequently are made to feel that we have to deny ourselves these things.  Certainly some may not be appropriate at certain given times; but that does not lessen their importance to us.

When did we decide that living in joy was not important?

Seriously, how many people are almost constantly doing things that make them happy?  We believe that happiness comes in small doses.  While this might be true, it doesn’t mean that the small doses cannot be frequent and regular.

Except that we have accepted that small doses of happiness are just that…small.  Short times, bits and pieces here and there.  But overall, we have to be “responsible adults” or “contributing members of the society” or “grown-ups” or any other trite statements to the effect that happy is less important than acceptable to the norm.

Why is it that we accept it as duty or obligation to spend so much of our time doing things that don’t make us happy?  No, I know I am not writing for everyone here – lots of people get to do their dream jobs, or live the life they most desire…but for every one of those people I suspect there are at least three people who don’t.  Based on an utterly unscientific survey and reading of my friends and their jobs, I would even submit my 1 to 3 ratio is pretty conservative.

To some degree, this is simply the nature of our society.  When you have to work to live, in-as-much as it’s accepted that you need to work to earn money to have food, shelter, clothing and transportation, let alone anything above and beyond that, it’s often easier to work a job that might not make you happy, but pays enough to cover your expenses.

To some degree society says that work shouldn’t be fun.  How many TV shows and movies have come out where work is the enemy, the killer of joy and happiness and fun?  How many times when we were growing up were we told we could play only after our chores and homework were done?  Is it any wonder we don’t equate working with being happy?

One of the main reasons for Pathwalking is to find and make my own destiny.  I want to make my way in this world, and live life…not let life live ME.  Because consciousness creates reality, I need to shift my thoughts more consciously towards what I actually want, rather than allowing myself to just accept what is.

Present reality, I have mentioned before, is the result of past thoughts, feelings and actions.  That can be a hard truth to believe, but if you are not seeing your present as what you wish it to be, you need to create a better one.

Hooky-Spooky Mumbo-Jumbo?  No, this is conscious reality creation in action.  If I get all hung up on things as they are, lamenting them, focusing on them, being displeased or otherwise unhappy with them, then I am subconsciously creating MORE OF THEM.  Why?  Because I am not working on conscious creation.

That’s how this works.  If you don’t do it consciously, you do it in your subconscious, and you get what you get and life lives you.  Think of what you want, feel what it feels like to have it, and take actions that are inspired and intentional to help it along.  That, or keep allowing your subconscious to drive the bus, and hope you get lucky or fate intervenes or you stumble upon it.  I know what I would rather do.

I want to be happy more than I am sad, depressed, or unhappy…don’t you?  How come we are so quick to accept that we only get to be happy on occasions few and far between, when it’s clear all of us would want much more than that?

Pathwalking is ultimately about being happy.  I used to say that content was good enough, but frankly content IS happy.  If I am content then I am happy.  Happy is not this big, unattainable thing that eludes us like a needle in a haystack…happy is what I believe, ultimately, each and every one of us desires from anything and everything we do.

Writing makes me feel good.  When I get to write I feel grounded, I feel centered, and I feel good and productive.  Knowing this, I want the path I walk to involve more writing, and with that abundance on every level, be it financial, physical, spiritual or otherwise.

What things make you happiest?  How often do you make them a part of your everyday life?

 

This is the two-hundred seventy-sixth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas and my personal experiences in walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Crossing the Bridges: Self Talk – What follows I AM

I speak less highly of myself than anyone else.  I am my own worst critic.

Always have been.  Know how that feels?  You always manage to find something to be critical about?  The one person you criticize the most, whom you give the absolute least amount of slack to being you?

I know that this does me no good.  If my plans are not completed or I get distracted or I fail to do as planned, I can count on myself to be completely harsh.  In my head I will berate myself, belittle myself, get mad at myself for any and all failings, mistakes, missteps, and so forth.

The self talk that comes of this is hugely demoralizing.  You’re a big fat failure, which is why you stay fat and out-of-shape; you allow distractions to get in the way of writing and editing, that’s why you’re never going to be a best seller; you will always get that red light at that same intersection, because the Universe enjoys messing with you; you have never established a proper career, that’s why you deserve half-successes at best.

These messages break down at their core to inform me thusly:  Failure.   You will never succeed.  You will always be a victim of circumstance.  You are undeserving.

This is why it is massively, hugely, unbelievably important that I be more conscious of my self-talk habits.  When I do not reign in my thoughts about myself, and I just let them  take flight of their own accord, it’s astoundingly easy to be down on myself, and that will only lower my vibrational frequency, and, this should come as no surprise, not allow me to manifest what I am seeking.

This harkens back to my Pathwalking this week, and discussing dealing with the squirrels in my brain.  Often, my personal squirrels chasing each other about are negative notions about who I am, criticizing, berating, demoralizing and otherwise providing me poor report of myself.  They make me feel negative, which lowers my vibrational energy, and thus takes me further away from the things I want to manifest.

The power of the words “I AM” is so, so much bigger than we realize.  I AM is a definitive statement, and what follows it describes us in detail.  The Universe hears I AM loudly and clearly.  As such, when I believe that I AM FAT or I AM A FAILURE or I AM UNDERSERVING or I AM UNLOVED or any other negative statement, the Universe hears, and will give me exactly that which I don’t want.

It is not lying to tell yourself that you are thin when you are not.  Of course, if you don’t believe it when you state it, you have no emotional energy available to generate anything.  You have to make statements you can get behind.  I AM GETTING INTO SHAPE and I AM SUCCEEDING and I AM DESERVING and I AM LOVED AND LOVING will raise your vibration, and they are statements you can get behind because they are active statements.

I make plans.  I take actions, but not always enough actions.  Frequently, when I do not accomplish what I have set out to, I will be the first (and frequently the only one, frankly) to tear me down.  This keeps me feeling low, causes me to question everything I am doing, and before I know it I am fighting the same battle over and over and over.

How do I stop being so critical of myself?  This is the question I have been asking for a long time now.  I believe that the answer to this question is how I learn to more frequently manifest what I desire for my life, and will make me happier.

I need to take an action.  This is the only way to develop anything meaningful.  Actions.  Forward motion.

I AM needs to be followed by something positive.  When I find myself feeling low, feeling depressed, feeling unworthy, I have to talk to myself.  I need to make statements such as I am extraordinary.  I am awesome.  I am deserving.  I am worthwhile.

Some days it is easier than others for me to recognize this about myself.  One of the most difficult things for me to do is to think more highly of myself, to really, truly love myself, and to recognize my own worth.  This is not about conceit, this is about recognizing that I deserve every success, and that I am worthy of the abundance of the Universe.

This has been a lifelong struggle for me…but because I deserve to be happy, I will continue.  We all have bad days, we certainly get bombarded by massive negativity from the world without – but that in no way lessens the true abundance of the Universe.  There is more than enough good for us all, we just have to work to find it.

I am deserving of all the good I desire.  So are you.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

GOAL LOG – Week 14:

Diet:  I have continued the lower carb, lower sugar diet overall.

Exercise:  I fenced Tuesday and Thursday, took a good 20+ minute walk Monday.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done.

Meditation:  Only one day last week, for about 6 minutes.

Gratitude:  I have expressed gratitude for 5 things six of seven days last week.

 

This is the twenty-eighth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

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