The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: edit

What Do I Want To Give The World?

I want to give back to the world.

One of my greatest desires is to give something of value to the world.  Whether it’s entertainment in the fiction that I write, insight from this blog, lessons in medieval rapier combat, or a pun to make someone crack a smile, I want to be a giver.

GiveOne of the risks of this, though, is focusing more on giving than receiving anything in return.  When in the course of day-to-day life one needs to earn a living, this can present a particular challenge.

I am working on reconciling this idea.  How?  By seeing and acknowledging the difference between being a giver and taker.

This has been covered both in Positivity and Pathwalking this week, but to reiterate, giver’s give from a place of abundance, with no real expectation of anything in return.  Takers may give from time to time, but it is with a demand for something in return.

That something can take a bunch of different forms.  Money, favors, praise, etc.  A giver does what they do to assist, help, and often empower.  A taker does what they do to curry favor, gain for themselves, and usually in order to disempower.

Yes, I want to get paid to be a writer.  My books are not available on Amazon for free.  This in part because this is how I want to cross the bridges between writing for fun and writing for a living.  Writing for a living is still fun for me, but I’d like to earn money doing it.

I have studied some ways with which I could monetize this blog.  Yeah, I would really like to make some money writing these posts.  But it is more important to me to maintain my principles and be a giver.

To give is not to sacrifice.

I think this is one of the issues I have to work with.  I’m aware of a lot of artist types like myself that hold onto several beliefs about money and integrity.

That’s one issue.  The other is how often we are told that you can’t make money as a writer/painter/sculptor/actor and so forth.  Only the very lucky few, such as Steven King, Salvador Dali, Leonardo DaVinci or Will Smith make it big.  Everyone else is struggling.

Earning an income can be difficult in the best of times.  Job security is pretty laughable in this day-and-age.  Even people in industries known to make good money find challenges.  Taking that into account, trying to cross the bridges between where I am now and where I want to be, it comes as no surprise that I feel rather conflicted.

I want to give, but not sacrifice in the process.  This is why there are certain types of writing I only do for money.  There was a small magazine I wrote three or four articles for, to put my name out there.  Free press.  But after one of my articles was the cover story, I said, “Hey, I am a writer.  I don’t normally just give this stuff away, so please pay me.”  Suffice it to say, they didn’t want any more articles for me.

Did I sacrifice something?  Truth is, no.  Continuing to write without pay would have made me angry.  Sure, I would have gotten my name out a few more times as a published writer, but I would have sacrificed my time and my energy, and gotten nothing in return.

Does that make me a taker?  No.  Why?  Because this is not a matter of selfishness, it is a matter of self-care.

Selfish versus selfless is the difference between take and give.

Do you expect a plumber to come into your home, fix a leak, install a toilet, and not get paid?  Would you expect a doctor to perform a surgery on you free of charge?  Of course not.  So how come people expect artistic types to give away our work for free?

Yes, I want to give value to the world.  Yes, I want to get paid to do this thing I love.  How do I reconcile being a giver versus being a taker?  To a large degree, it all comes down to intent.

To receive fair value for services rendered is how our society works.  The problem comes in when we get confused between levels of value, fair versus unfair, and greed.  Presently, a great deal of what we see in regards to the wealthy is a staggering level of greed.  The unfortunate, unintended trickle-down from this is a blurring if the lines.

As such, wanting to receive fair value for my writing while still giving something back is not a selfish act.  It doesn’t mean I am ending my blog, nor am I about to start charging you to read it.  But in the process of consciously creating reality, I want to manifest a career as a professional writer.  This is my ultimate goal.

The why of my goal, however, is because I want to give something more to the world.  Whether I take you away to a fantasy world, make you laugh, or help you manifest a better life with conscious reality creation, it all is about my greatest desire to give.

Give from a place of abundance.  Do so with joy and passion.  Give because it feels incredible.  That is my intent in manifesting the life I most desire to live.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me.

 

This is the sixty-fifth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletter.  Thank you!
Sign up for your FREE eBook!

How Do I Break the Pattern?

I am the only one who can break the pattern.  But I don’t have all the answers.

More often than not what I have is more questions.

I believe that this is one of the things, though, that makes life worth living.  New questions, new things to learn, answers to be found for questions asked.

I have been asking myself a lot of questions lately.  That’s what I do when I find myself on unfamiliar ground.  Here I am, between jobs, with a real idea of what it is I want to create for my life.

Before I was let go from my last job, I wrote out a schedule for myself.  I set up my day for the ideal job of writing full time.

In this schedule I allowed myself a somewhat flexible wake-up time.  I set aside time to write and edit, time to workout, time to read.  The plan that I created would allow me to get a whole bunch of work done, and really set me up to generate the life I most desire.

Consciousness creates reality.  That means to me that I am capable of manifesting the life I want to live.  Rather than get stuck in another so-so job; instead of working somewhere for eight hours a day that does not make me happy, I actively pursue the life I want, work for myself and spend more time in a good headspace.

Have I managed to do this?  Yes…and no.  I am still not entirely following my schedule, and I am coming up with distractions and excuses to carry it out completely.  Why am I failing at this?

Questions and answers.

I need to be completely honest with myself here.  I have had issues with ambition for a long time now.  There are ideas I have.  Plans get made.  Yet, time moves forward, and I continue to return again and again to the same issues.

Stay with me here, this might be something of a wild ride.  There is a pattern to my life, and I think I am only now acknowledging how much power I have given it.  In an ironic twist, I have been blogging for some time now about how we are the only ones who have control over our emotions.  Nobody but me feels what I feel.  How often do I take control of what I am feeling?  When am I most aware of the thoughts, feeling and action in regards to consciously creating my reality?  When do I let myself just go with the flow?

I see this pattern before me.  I plot out a new idea to work for myself, either with the writing of my novels or starting some new kind of writing-related business, or somehow working for myself.  Then I start up, I get a little traction…and then it falls apart.  Distractions overwhelm me, I half-ass my plan, I get disenchanted…then I stop believing in myself.  The conclusion is reached that I am incapable of making this happen, and it’s time to once again take another job working for someone else…and hopefully this time it won’t bore me, make me miserable, or otherwise feel like a total waste of time.

The pattern repeats.

Rinse, repeat.  I created Pathwalking in 2012, the idea being that I took a New Years Action, and started to blog weekly.  Pathwalking almost instantly became my life philosophy.  From there, I have further developed this idea of working on active conscious reality creation.  Overall, my life has been pretty excellent since I started this.  I’ve achieved a lot of different things and seen my life advance in some rather awesome ways.

Yet here I am today, without a job again, and I am questioning my purpose in life.  I am questioning my motivation, my ambition, my willpower.  Am I willing to do what needs to be done to consciously create my reality?  Do I believe in myself enough to manifest this?

The pattern must be broken.

I am the only one who can change this.  The pattern can only be broken by me.  It is up to me to use my own mind, to become truly aware of what I am feeling and to do something with that.  There is no magic pill, there is no single answer to this, except that I have to take action.  I have to break this pattern.

Tony Robbins writes a lot about breaking patterns.  To do that, you have to be aware of the words you choose to describe your emotions and situations you find yourself in.  Rather than self-sabotage by allowing myself to get distressed with the process or depressed or failing to keep to my plan, I need to change my self-talk.  I need to get impressed by the possibility, and I need to allow a momentary setback instead of depression; I need to not be failing at keeping my plan, I need to change my approach to the plan.  Break my habits, break my patterns, redirect the language in my head.

Only I have the answers.

I am never going to have all the answers…nor do I want to.  Life is about questions, learning, exploring, and gaining new knowledge and insight.  I am capable of conscious reality creation, and I can manifest the life I desire.  I see the pattern I do not want to follow before me, and I alone can break it.

Apologies for the rambling of this particular post.  There is a lot on my mind, and for some reason this one has been really hard to compose.  There are bridges I intend to cross, and I need to get the hell out of my own way.  That’s what this is about.  Nobody but me feels what I feel, I alone can ask the questions and seek the answers.  Only I can break my pattern, change my habits, and manifest my desires.

Your support, reading these disjointed paragraphs today, is greatly appreciated.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 34:

Diet:  I did not fully track my diet last week.

Exercise:  Fencing two days, no trips to the gym.  One walk.

Writing:  The three blog posts were done; editing of Harbinger occurred.

Meditation:  Five of seven days last week, never less than 8 minutes.

Gratitude:  I expressed gratitude for 5 things only once last week.

 

This is the forty-ninth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

Thoughts on my Writing

Writing is my passion.

While my favorite things to write are fantasy, sci-fi and Steampunk, I enjoy writing EVERYTHING.  Give me a topic, tell me how many words you want and I will write!

I totally need and want more paid writing gigs.  But I digress.

Over the years I’ve written brochures, blogs, text for websites and many other business-centric pieces.  For a time I even had my own company for this purpose, though its focus was a bit broader.

For the longest time I thought myself a pretend writer.  I had only a couple small works published, I was full of uncertainty.  But now I see that I have always been a writer, and always will be.

Let’s recap, shall we?

Rum_Cover

First there were my short stories, A Treacherous Stone, published by Dragon Moon Press in the anthology Rum and Runestones; and then The Vapor Rogues, published again by Dragon Moon Press in the anthology Spells and Swashbucklers.  Both of these anthologies, if you have not read them, are full of stories all about pirates and magic by some pretty awesome authors!

SPELLS_COVER-front

After these two short stories had been published, I decided to try my hand at self-publishing.  I began with Pathwalking – A 21st Century Philosophy.  This is the first year of my Pathwalking blog, along with some additional bits.  I have been blogging Pathwalking every Wednesday for over 4.5 years, and still going! I am currently exploring offering classes on the topic, and creating a workbook of a sort to go with it.

Pathwalking_Cover_for_Kindle

I began the fantasy series The Source Chronicles back in 1998.  Along the way I had, for a time, an agent, though this was not his normal line of publishing.  Then the first book – Seeker – was professionally edited.  I continued to seek an agent or publisher, until I decided, nope, time to go this on my own.  I published Seeker – The Source Chronicles Book I at the end of 2014.

BookCoverImage

A year later, after completing editing, I published Finder – The Source Chronicles Book II.  Still not sure everyone who purchased Seeker realizes its sequel is available, and I have yet to see any reviews on Amazon.

Finder_Cover_for_Kindle

The third book in The Source ChroniclesHarbinger – is complete, but unedited.  My current plan is to have THAT one out in 2017.

Over the course of several years, I have participated in National Novel Writer’s Month (NaNoWriMo).  I have, as such, completed 4 novelettes.  On more than one occasion I ventured out of my usual comfort zone and wrote something different from my regular genres.  One such story was Vortex Pilgrimage.  Influenced highly by the works of Paulo Coelho, I decided in July 2015 to edit and publish it.

Vortex Pilgrimage CoverImage

After some things posted to social media over a couple particularly dark days, an idea came to me.  Back into the realm of non-fiction, I wrote a short self-help/holistic short book called Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.  I have this fairly simple idea I felt the need to express and share.

Five_Easy_Steps_to_C_Cover_for_Kindle(1)

Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better also was my first foray into using Smashwords to spread my work to a broader audience.

Back to fiction, I decided after all the world building that I did for The Vapor Rogues short story, I needed to create more.  So I began a new novel series.  I had completed the first book, and determined to get it edited.  That completed, just in time for the Steampunk World’s Fair I published Clouds of Authority – A Vapor Rogues Novel.  Yes, it’s Steampunk, but it is also full of elements of both sci-fi and fantasy.

Clouds_of_Authority_Cover_for_Kindle

The next book in that series, Clouds of Destiny, is complete, I just need to edit it.

So I have now published a total of six different works, covering several genres.  I blog twice weekly, Positivity on Mondays and Pathwalking on Wednesdays.  I have 2 more complete novels, both in need of editing.

What am I working on now?

Currently I have one editing project and one writing project underway.

IMG_2511

Editing: The first successful NaNoWriMo piece I wrote was a narrative of my experience following the reason why this blog is called The Ramblings of a Titanium Don.  As I mention from time to time, in November of 1999 I was struck by a car while crossing a street (which resulted in my having titanium plates put into my right shoulder).  I wrote about my recovery and my life over the next few years after the accident.  It is fairly humorous, and also a true recounting from my perspective of that time.  It is one of the most personal things I have EVER written, and over the years numerous people have told me THIS is the story I should be publishing.

Well, after years of resisting, I am moving forward with editing The Journey of a Thousand Miles…Begins with a Trip to the Post Office.  The names have been changed to protect people, and rereading this has been an interesting experience for me.  I am unsure just when I will be publishing this, but keep watching.

Writing: For some time now I have been itching to go back to my favorite genre, sci-fi.  I just wasn’t coming up with an idea.  Then, in September of last year, something popped into my head.  Since then I have been writing this epic sci-fi space opera, creating new worlds, alien races, and using several non-traditional characters as well as playing around with some of the standard tropes of sci-fi stories.  I am creating a rich universe with a diverse cast of characters, and it has been a LOT of fun to work on.

treacherous stone inside

I still have no title for the story, but it’s probably so far on the order of about 350 pages and counting.  Not sure when this will be completed and shared with the world, but keep an eye out for it.

Once I complete editing The Journey of a Thousand Miles…I will either start editing Clouds of Destiny or Harbinger.  Additionally, I need to soon pick up where I left off in Guardians, the 4th book in The Source Chronicles.

So, dear reader, I have two requests of you.  If you have enjoyed any of my works, PLEASE share the links with friends!  Please, if you’ve not done so, take a moment to review on Amazon.  Word-of-mouth is STILL my best marketing tool, and more readers means more people buying my work, which in turn means I can spend more of my time writing, editing and publishing.  As I began, writing is my passion!

THANK YOU!  Thank you for your encouragement, and all your support and inspiration.  THANK YOU!

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén