The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

Tag: belief (Page 1 of 37)

What’s Your Opinion?

Everyone is capable of having an opinion.

Being entitled to an opinion, however, has frequently been carried to a dangerous and unhealthy extreme.

What’s the difference?  Let’s say that it is my opinion that the moon is made of green cheese.  We know of course that it’s not.  We have physical evidence returned from the moon to disprove me.  When you show me a moon rock, and explain to me that the composition of the moon is not cheesy, I should be capable of accepting that my opinion has been disproven.

Our modern society, however, believes in being entitled to your opinion, and as such denies fact.  How else do you explain flat earthers?  Science deniers?  Anti-vaxxers?  Facts to the contrary are being blatantly disregarded in favor of “popular” opinion.

Yes, some opinions are mostly harmless.  If you are five foot two and want to believe that you are tall, or you are old and want to believe you are young, it doesn’t cause harm.  The trouble comes when you try to force an opinion on others and inflict damage.

Look at American politics.  This administration ignores science and economic fact for opinion on numerous topics, and seems to be striving to return us all to the dark ages.  Despite a broad lack of support for eliminating the Affordable Care Act, the Senate very nearly succeeded at taking it down.  Opinion is overwhelming fact.

How did we get here?  When did we leave the age of reason behind and allow for faulty opinion to be the basis for policy and directing our society as a whole?

I have no answer.  However, I have thoughts on how to begin to change the conversation.

You can only control your own opinion.

This can be really hard to accept.  Why?  Because if our particular opinion is based in fact – for instance, it’s my opinion that the Earth is round.  Science agrees with me.  I admit that I cannot fathom how anyone in the 21st century believes otherwise.  For centuries now the vast majority have accepted the reality of a round planet.  How can anyone possibly deny this and believe otherwise?

Because some people feel they are entitled to their opinion, they are unwilling to let it go even when disproven.  They think they are right, and they will not hear or accept otherwise.  They get stubborn, even belligerent when you try to show them they are factually mistaken.  You can’t talk to them, and you won’t change them.

When we have fact on our side we tend to get into arguments with these people.  Why?  Probably because we cannot fathom how they can hold onto a ludicrous, non-factual notion.  Of course, to add insult to injury, usually arguing with people “entitled” to their opinions only causes them to dig in their heels.

This is why it’s important to recognize the only opinion over which you have control is your own.  I am the only one who can make up my opinions, and that is that.  I can argue until I am blue in the face, but when someone has decided their opinion is a fact, even with irrefutable proof otherwise, I will fail to change their mind.

Of course, this can get particularly ugly sometimes.  White supremacist marches, disempowering a protest with false patriotism, or name-calling and expressions of anger over a difference of opinion gets ugly.  More so in the face of opinions contrary to facts.

Working around false opinions can be done.

It’s not easy, but it’s possible.  How?  By working with others who believe in fact.  Marching for Science, for Women’s Rights, standing up peacefully against the KKK and white supremacists are all steps in that direction.

We tend to take a stand against the thing we do not want, including opinions.  While resistance is not futile, and often vital, it’s imperative that we stand FOR something.  The more of us who stand together in support of a thing rather than against a thing, the more we can affect the collective consciousness.

When we argue with those who hold opinions lacking in fact, we allow them to empower their opinion.  We end up giving them a forum to spout their non-factual opinion, and strive to legitimize it.

Recently, an acquaintance wrote an attack against a community I am part of with an opinion counter to fact.  Rather than argue with that person’s opinion, the majority of the community stood up for the fact of the matter.  From there, friends and acquaintances of the community also stood up for the fact.  Rather than an outpouring of anger and argument against the attacker, we’re seeing positive support for the attacked.

Sure, there is still anger and hurt over this opinion that was expressed.  Yet I think the outpouring of support for the attacked rather than countering the attacker with fact goes much further in generating a better outcome.

How does opinion matter to your path?

We all form opinions.  It’s human nature, because we believe in things.  We have faith in things.  The important thing is to recognize that while you are capable of having an opinion, you are not entitled to it, even when you are factually correct.  When we let go of our entitlement to opinion, I think we open ourselves up more to spreading fact and changing opinions that are held which are counterfactual.

This is challenging, but I believe it’s totally worthwhile.

What’s your opinion on holding opinions?

 

This is the three-hundred-second entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Please take a moment to subscribe to this blog!  Even if you have done so before, there is new material, and a free gift with your subscription.

Who Am I Disappointing?

Should I be concerned about disappointing myself?

I struggle with this pretty frequently, and I know I am not alone in this.

Who am I Disappoiting?Who am I?  I ask that question a lot.  Part of why I keep asking is because I am constantly changing – which is part of the human condition.  Another reason why I ask is because I know that you probably have a different impression of me than I have of myself.

Ever hear a recording of your voice and feel like, whoa, is that really how I sound?  If you hear enough recordings of your voice, you get used to how everyone else hears you.  It gives you an outside impression of an aspect of yourself.

Same thing applies to photos.  Ever look at a picture and wince at how you look?  Again, you are seeing yourself from without.

Inside my own head, I see myself differently than how you see me.  My voice is deeper, my body is stockier rather than flabby, and my hair is more pepper than salt.  If I feel good about myself, then these superficial aspects you see are not terribly important.

However, if I start to see the flabby guy with the greying hair and it makes me feel bad, and I become disappointed about myself, this can begin an ugly trend that might pick up speed and spiral out to further disappointment.

I am a social person.  I do a lot of things that put me out there.  Between publishing these posts weekly and teaching fencing and standing up in SCA courts, I present multiple facets of who I am.  Because I want people to think well of me, I worry about the impressions I make.

Is there anyone who I should worry about disappointing?

Yes.  Myself.  Because it’s a universal truth that you cannot please all the people all the time.  Some people are going to think I am pretty awesome.  Others are going to think I am not so awesome.  Still others probably think I’m an asshole.  I have no control over what you think about me.

Except I really wish that I did.  I don’t want people to think I’m an asshole.  I want people to think well of me.  It matters to me that I not be a disappointment to anyone.

Why?  How come this is important to me at all?  Because at the root of all my fears is the ultimate fear of abandonment.  The fear that I will be left to stand completely and totally alone in the world.  Fear of success, fear of failure are really just the surface concerns.  What I fear the most is being abandoned.

Subconsciously, I think if I disappoint you, in time you’ll give up on me, and walk away.  So long, and thanks for all the fish.  If I do not live up to my ideals, I will lose the people I have in my life.

Of course, in realty, this is ludicrous.  But the larger issue that this causes is that I have a certain ideal I strive to live up to.  In the pursuit of my goals and the bridges I am crossing, I have a standard I work to maintain.

When I do not keep control of my diet, or I don’t get to the gym, or meditate, or stick to my plan, I end up disappointed in myself.  I berate myself, I get annoyed with myself, and begin to think poorly of who I am.

Where does the disappointment come from?

I supposed I could blame certain outside influences for my feelings of disappointment.  I know that certain people close to me feel I have not made the most of my life.  There is worry that I might let down other people who are close to me, and that while they won’t tell me I am disappointing them, I am.  Of course, there is nobody to blame, because how I feel is all on me.

I think it’s a matter of validation.  Yet in truth, I think its more valuation than validation.  The difference is that approval is not indicative of worth.  Yet, if you look at Trump, to him approval is the sign of his worth, so maybe it’s not so surprising a thing.

I have been struggling a long time with feeling worthwhile.  Because I have spent so much of my life seeking validation in order to gage my valuation, I disappoint myself too easily.  When I become disappointed, I begin to feel worthless, and I question everything.

To better combat this issue, I need to re-evaluate what I think of myself.  I have mentioned how important self-talk is before, and it really is essential to think well of who I am.  When I don’t think good thoughts about myself, is inevitable that I will wind up disappointing myself instead.

While I sometimes find affirmations a little cheesy, that does not lessen their importance.  I need to remember when I begin feeling disappointment in myself I am worthwhile.  If I am disappointing other people, that’s not on me, because the person I need to not disappoint is myself.

Affirmation is valuation.

My new affirmation, whenever I begin feeling as if I am disappointing myself, is this:

I am worthwhile, skilled, loved, and I deserve good things in my life.

Consciousness creates reality.  I need to recognize when I am thinking poorly of myself, and actively turn it around.  When you find yourself in the same struggle, I encourage you to acknowledge your own worth, and know that you are not alone in this.

We’ve got this.  We will not be disappointing anyone, ourselves included.  As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 39:

Diet:  Back on track, writing it out.

Exercise:  Fencing one day, three days at the gym, two days where I took long walks.

Writing:  Three blog posts, some work on the sci-fi story.

Meditation: Four days last week, never less than 8 minutes.

Gratitude:  I was grateful for 5 things five days last week

 

This is the fifty-fourth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

How is Pathwalking a Challenge?

I have a lot on my mind right now, and choosing a topic has been an interesting challenge.

I have been presented with the opportunity to well and truly walk my path.  This has put me in a position where I can work on setting the schedule I desire, make the use of my time I most want to.  Further, this has afforded me a chance to work on building the destiny I most want from my life.

While I am working on this, however, I am still aware of the world around me.  It is difficult sometimes to work on my own desires when I see what is happening out there.

While we can control our emotional state more readily than we usually acknowledge, it is still a challenge to do so.  There are competing feelings along the way, some of which serve and some definitely do not.

The issue here is reconciling who I am, versus who I was, versus who I want to be.  A great deal of this can be quantified with a more keen awareness of here-and-now.  Yet that presents its own challenges.

How do I create the life I most desire without neglecting responsibilities, and while working to have a positive impact on the world around me?  How do I change my mindset so that the bad feelings don’t overcome the good?

Challenges both personal and impersonal.

I have been effected by what is going on in the United States these past several months.  A Congress which cares only for their special interests; a greedy, narcissistic, clearly unstable man-child holding the Presidency.  Additionally, there are resurgent hate-groups rallying in public, threatening myself and my loved ones out of fear and anger.   I am striving to not let this inundate me, but I cannot ignore it either.

Finding a happy-medium and striking a balance between needing to know what is going on and being overwhelmed with information about it all is challenging.  Then, just to make it that much harder, living in a fear-based society where our media has to be scrutinized for bias and partisanship can be truly distressing.

Amidst all of that, I am working on creating the reality I most desire for myself.  What I want to do is non-conventional.  Thus it comes with a degree of guilt and even shame because I know so many people who believe this is not how it works.

How do I reconcile these seemingly opposed matters?  That’s the question before me today, so please bear with me as I walk through it.

Challenge Accepted.

First and foremost, I think I need to consume less media.  I want to be aware of what is going on out there, but I need to not drown myself in it.  There is just so much information.  Then there’s a metric ton of anger, fear, hate, loathing, deep concern, and all sorts of additional negative feelings attached to it.  I’m already avoiding watching any news networks.  I think I need to spend less time in my Twitter feed and online overall.

However, I still need and want to support those resisting this.  I am pro-equality, in every single form that takes.  A supporter of equal rights, pay, and equal treatment under the law, I need to continue to do all I can to show that support.

One critical aspect of this, however, boils down to my mental and emotional health.  By walking my own path and creating the life I most desire, I am setting myself up to be more effective to those causes.

Mental health is an inside job.

In addition to our society being fear-based, we also are terrific at passing the buck, placing blame, and taking little to no accountability for anything.  The message we are constantly presented with is that someone else is wrong, it is another’s fault, and so-and-so is blameless in ‘x’ matter.

This winds up getting applied to feelings as well.  You made me feel angry; that made me feel bad; they hurt me; you made me feel unimportant and the like get tossed about too easily.  Certainly other people and events can cause us to feel a certain way, but we are the only ones who can feel it.

We get to choose, when something makes us feel bad, how long to hold onto that.  Do you want to wallow in it, or acknowledge it, react to it, then let it go?  This is entirely within our individual power to affect.

As such, creating the life I most want to live will grow my positive feelings.  I have spent a lot of time working at jobs where I was not capable of living up to my full potential for any number of reasons.  I have spent a long time in that position because of a combination of choices, not choosing, and feelings of inadequacy or disillusionment or fear of success and failure.

Now I have reached the point in my life where I believe that I CAN have what I want, that I am able to do this thing which will ultimately make me happy, and financially secure, and stable.

Belief is the challenge.

Because I am facing conflicting emotions as I am beginning to walk my desired path, I am encountering difficulties in maintaining it.  I set a schedule for my “perfect” weekday, setting aside time to work, to read, to exercise, to make this happen.  Yet because I have some guilt about this, because it is unconventional, there is a slight undercurrent of doubt I am contending with.  This is making it harder to manifest what I want, and to take this to the next level where I can make a living doing this.

What I am currently reading speaks a lot to interrupting patterns and changing the language applied to my thoughts.  The greatest challenge I have right now is believing that I am capable of changing the message, creating the focus I need to feel the life I want to have into existence.  I cannot ignore the feelings of doubt, but I can choose if I will let them dictate my actions, or if I can change them to something more productive.

What challenges are you working with today?

 

This is the two-hundred ninety-fifth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Please take a moment to subscribe to this blog!  Even if you have done so before, there is new material, and a gift with your subscription.

 

Why the “How” of things trips me up.

Why does the “how” of it all continue to get in my way?

Two weeks ago I discussed the block I encounter between idea and end goal.  I want to be a bestselling author.  The “how” of the process is what keeps tripping me up, and I think it’s time to dig deeper into why that is.

Conscious reality creation works.  I’ve done it many times, and I intellectually understand it.  One of my greatest issues, though, is emotions, which is part of how I keep stumbling.

exploring the howIn no regard do I blame my parents, certainly not after all this time.  When they divorced nearly four decades ago, to protect myself from feeling hurt and taking undue blame for their divorce, I shunted off my emotions.  I was a smart enough kid to tell the psychologist what the feelings should feel like…but I didn’t actually feel them.  This would go on for over twenty-five years, until a different therapist and I unlocked this matter.

Feelings…nothing more than feelings.

Once I recognized my intellectualization of emotions, rather than feeling them, I was able to start changing things.  Thus I began to work on actually feeling, and from there my life changed.  I started to feel a passion for manifesting what I wanted, I started to approach relationships differently, and this is where I began to build the life I have today.

I have come to believe that while thought and intentional action are important to manifesting things, the key is feeling.  You can’t just think and act on something, you have to FEEL it.  You have to feel certain, sure that it will be.  It is necessary to feel that my thought has been made manifest, and let the Universe deliver.

I always want to know how.

I am a curious person.  Understanding how things work has always been a part of my nature.  There has always been a drive to uncover the truth of things, and to really know “how” the universe works.

There are any number of instances where knowing how things work is useful.  I like knowing how an airplane flies, how my circulation system works, how to change a tire and other information.  But when it comes to manifesting through conscious reality creation, figuring out “how” it works gets in the way.

Simply put, every single book I have read or listened to says the same thing.  You begin with thought, then give that thought feeling, and from there take intentional actions to move things forward.  Simple enough, except often exactly HOW this will work is unknown.

I want to be a bestselling author.  That’s my thought.  I strive to feel what that will feel like, feel how it will affect my life, my moods, my thinking, my finances.  I work to feel it in the now, to really be truly aware of what it feels like.  Then, I take actions that tie in, with the intent of making it manifest.

Questioning how.

How is this going to work?  Then how will I turn my existing work into bestsellers?  How do I make money from this?  Then how do I promote myself to get known?  All of these questions begin with the same word – HOW.  Because I cannot see how to get from where I am to where I want to be, I move forward at a snail’s pace, or less.

The Secret sums up the conscious creation process thus: Ask, Believe, Receive.  Ask for what I want, Believe I already have it, and then Receive it.  I know this is how manifestation works…but I still seek to know more detailed HOW.

Is this a lack of faith?

I am a proponent of logic.  Science and reason offer truth.  However, I am all for faith, but not to the exclusion of reason.  Blind Faith was a great band, but is not a great way to approach life, the universe and everything.

The universe is full of infinite possibility.  My faith in this comes from proof I’ve witnessed with my own eyes, and is not blind.  But my need to understand how, seeking logic and reason in the illogical, causes a paradox that complicates my work to live the life I most desire to.

It all ties into my need to feel more thoroughly.  Faith is a feeling.  I need to have faith that this is possible, and that how it will come about is not something to concern myself with.  I need to feel that this is real, that I have achieved it, and believe that it’s mine.  There needs to be faith that I am capable of manifesting this.  Conscious reality creation.

I know that this will not supplant my need to understand how.  That’s a part of my nature.  But knowing that my preoccupation with “how” interferes with my paths is an important step.  I have become aware of this matter.  Awareness is part of conscious reality creation, so I can work with this to move forward.

Think.  Feel.  Actions.

More meditation.  I need to take more pauses in the day to be truly aware of what I am thinking and feeling, and work on keeping my eye on the prize.  I know I can do this.  There is no need for me to know how, I just need to feel it through.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges with me.

 

GOAL LOG – Week 31:

The goal log has not been fully maintained this week, as I am attending the Pennsic War.

 

This is the forty-fifth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to click the subscribe button (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted) and sign up for my newsletters!  Thank you!

How to Make Monday YOUR Day

Today will be whatever you make it be.

It’s far too easy to approach Monday and the traditional start of the work week with distress, trepidation, displeasure, and unhappiness.  There is an entire culture of Monday woe in this society, which has been and continues to be capitalized on, and as such gets reinforced.

Does anyone want Monday to suck?  I am pretty sure the answer is NO.  I don’t really know anyone who wants to be miserable, who wants to have a bad day and a bad week, or who craves feeling powerless and unhappy.

We are all so much more powerful than we give ourselves credit for.  For real, we are the creators of the world in which we live.  My favorite line from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory has always been, “We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams.”  In other words, we have control over the lives we live.  We choose the beat we dance to in this life, and the dreams we experience.

Keeping this in mind, why do we so readily ascribe lousiness to Monday?  Because that’s our culture.  We have this wide-ranging belief that Monday, as the beginning of the new work week, is going to probably be no fun, distressing, and generally unpleasant.

If like attracts like, and consciousness creates reality, what do you think approaching Monday with dread is going to do?  Further, why perpetuate this negative, frankly depressing approach to a day in our lives?  We are only on this earth for a limited time.  Yeah, there are going to be days that suck, and there are going to be issues and problems and challenges to be had, and sometimes it really is easiest to just go with it, go with the flow, let it be as it will be.

However, we have a choice.  Rather than fall into this notion and allow for another lousy Monday, another set-up for a less-than-desired work week, why don’t we seek better?  Why don’t we use the tools we have available to us like gratitude and positivity generators to change the station, tune in more desirable music?

Yes, we will need to expend some effort to break from the norm.  It could make people look at us askance, and wonder why we aren’t doing things in the same way they are.  So what?  If like attracts like, and consciousness creates reality, if we approach the week from a positive perspective, then we are apt to attract more positives our way.

Monday needn’t start us off in deficit, we have the ability instead to begin in abundance.  Wouldn’t you rather look to be content and happy than distraught and unhappy?  Seems like a no-brainer to me.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that we have the power to choose how to approach the start of the work week, we can work on choosing to approach it from a place of abundance.  When we see the day for possibility rather than for impossibility, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-sixth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Five_Easy_Steps_to_C_Cover_for_Kindle(1)

How do you recognize if you’re walking the right Path?

How do I know if I am on the right path?

This is probably the most basic, yet most challenging question to ask.  The answer is both amazingly simple, and yet fairly complicated.

Pathwalking is making choices about living life, in order to work to consciously create our personal reality as we want it to be.  Rather than simply going along with life and letting whatever happens, happen; as we walk our chosen paths we strive to be present and aware.  We don’t want to let life just occur, we are working on living life to its fullest.

There is always more than one path.  That’s how the universe works.  If consciousness creates reality, as this blog asserts, then we can choose virtually any path we might desire.  As such, there is more than one “right” path for us.

It’s important to recognize that the idea of “right” is fairly loaded.  Right is often the extreme opposite of wrong, but in this context right is a matter of feeling, desire, and drive.  Further, today’s right choice could be wrong for us tomorrow.

I recognize that that’s pretty vague.  This is because the specifics of what is right for me are not going to necessarily be right for you, or for anyone else for that matter.  “Right” in this particular context is a matter of feeling, belief and faith.

How do I recognize the right path?

The short answer is that the right path will feel good.  It will almost seem like its too easy, and the work you do along the right path feels less like work, and more like play.  It’s surprisingly easy to lose track of time when you are on the right path, because you get so caught up in it you just take action because it’s what you need to do.

For example, when I am writing, and really getting into my work, whether it’s my blog or my fiction or even writing for business, I often just flow with it. Time loses meaning, and I come away from a project feeling complete, content, and like I wasn’t working at all, just doing what feels good to me.

I desire to be writing more frequently.  I am driven to write, and that is how I am certain that this is the path that is right for me.

It feels good.  It feels like it is what I am supposed to do.  That is how I know my path is the right path.  But to really be travelling upon that path, it’s important to believe and have faith.

What’s the difference between belief and faith?

In many respects these are similar concepts, but not in this context.  How does this work, then?  Belief is important to Pathwalking, because if you don’t believe that consciousness can create reality, and that you can choose your own destiny, your own path in life, then you are going to be incapable of living this way.

I believe that I can create the life I desire.  I have made this work before, more than once.  And that is where faith comes into play.

I believe in this…but I don’t necessarily have faith.  I believe, in the abstract, but my faith in my own belief is open to scrutiny, questioned by my own skepticism.  But more than that, what this boils down to is my faith in myself.  I believe that consciousness creates reality, but I have no faith in myself to consciously create it.

If I am responsible for consciously creating my reality, then I need to have faith in myself.  I am the only one who can make MY life what I want it to be.  But if I lack faith in myself, what can I do?

How do you create faith in yourself?

When you believe in yourself, you believe you are capable of almost anything.  We nearly all feel this way as children, but as we get older and we are exposed to certain “realities”, this fades.  We can regain our ability to believe in abstracts, but after that we have to have faith – faith in ourselves.

Skepticism, cynicism, self-doubt, self-recrimination, second-guessing and self-deprecation are all born of a lack of faith.  Despite what you might believe about conscious reality creation, you don’t have sufficient faith in yourself to achieve it.  This is evident if your self-talk is frequently negative, such as I am no good; I am unimportant; I am fat; I am lazy; I fail more often than I succeed; if I don’t joke about myself everyone else will; and so on.  When you speak ill of yourself, it shows a lack of faith in who you are capable of being.

You may not be who you want to be right now.  That’s ok.  One of the reasons to choose Pathwalking is to become the person you most want to be, even if that is not who you are now.  To do that you have to think about it, feel it out, take inspired, intentional actions – and believe in the possibility; have faith in your ability to succeed.  When it feels like you can conquer the world, and you believe in conscious reality creation and have faith in yourself, you will know that are on the right path for you.

Do you have faith in yourself and your ability to choose your own destiny?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-fourth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Five Quick-and-Easy Positivity Generators

Everyone prefers to feel good over feeling bad.

Finding positivity is about finding ways to feel good.  We live in a society that feeds on a steady diet of negativity.  Fear is a tool employed by many differently “leaders” to keep people in line, and sensationalism sells and gets more clicks on social media.  This can make it far easier to live in fear and negativity than to find positivity.

Also, it’s Monday…so most of us are going to work after a weekend off.  It is widely accepted that Mondays should be loathed.  I figure, why start the work week in negativity and set that tone for the week, when we can create positivity and allow ourselves to feel better.

There are many, many things that generate positivity, but the follow five are things you can do with little or no effort, more than once in a given day, and they will help.

  1. Smile. Seriously, just take a minute and smile.  You don’t need to laugh, you don’t need to have anything in particular to smile about, simply smile for a minute or so, and see how you feel.
  2. Breathe deeply. Take at least two minutes to breathe deeply, intentionally.  Really focus on the breathing, and let the air in.  You’d be surprised how just breathing and not doing anything else will make you feel.
  3. Sit or stand more erect. Consider your posture.  When you slouch and slump, there is no energy flow.  When you stand up straight or sit up straight, you energize your core, and you would be surprised how that will improve your mood.
  4. Stretch. Roll your neck, roll your shoulders, stretch out your arms and legs for a minute or two. These are the only bodies we have, and we tend to abuse them.  Stretching doesn’t just keep our joints and muscles strong, it also helps us relax and feel more flexible.
  5. Disconnect. Go offline for a few minutes.  Take a short walk.  Step away from whatever you are doing and reset yourself.  This can be less than five minutes, and I always have suspected this is part of the allure for smokers.  You get away from it all a few minutes to get your nicotine fix.  Well, for non-smokers, we also need a few minutes to get away and break from things.  Leave your computes, tablets and phones behind for 1 to 5 minutes, and free yourself.

None of these things need to take more than five minutes, and can take as little as one minute.  All of them will allow us to feel better, and I know that I prefer to feel good over feeling bad.  It seems so very simple, and yet we tend to neglect this all too easily.

There are other options out there, but I suggest rather than getting caught up in the negativity of the world at large, each of us can generate positivity for ourselves, and from there we might find we can do much, much more than we think.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that there are little things we can do to feel good, we have tools at our disposal to improve our days.  When we make the effort to use these tools to check and alter our feeling, we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-fifth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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What are challenges vs struggles with Pathwalking?

Pathwalking can be fraught with many challenges.

I long ago came to believe that nothing worth having is ever easy.  But there is a difference between challenge and struggle.  Challenge involves growth and proactive change, while struggle is stagnation and reactive change.  Challenge is deciding to change, while struggle is forced.

Many of the challenges in Pathwalking are due to outside influences, some which we can control and some which we cannot.  Recognizing this is the first step towards working with it, and keeping challenges from becoming struggles.

Further, when you recognize that you are struggling, it is possible to transmute your struggle into a challenge.  This is where taking control of the matters which you can control comes into play.

What is outside of your control?  Other people, situations that are not of your making, world news and such.  Let’s face it…we live in tumultuous times.  There is a tremendous amount of upheaval and reactionary measures happening because people are either making poor choices or no choices due to fear of change.  We can protest, we can vote more wisely, we can choose where and how to spend our money, but we cannot change these people, their actions or how they think, no matter how badly we want to do that.

What is inside of your control?  Everything that is yours in your life.  Your thoughts, feelings and actions, your situations, your mental state, how you use your time and so on.  You are the only person who can think for you, feel for you, act for you.  Nobody else can make you think, feel or do anything you do not allow yourself to think, feel and do.

We frequently give this away without realizing that we are doing that.  They influenced my thinking and she made me feel that way and I only did that thing because you made me do it.  Easy enough to give that power away, but that is a choice, a decision.  The power is yours, but you get to choose if you will take hold of it, or not.

Looking out for yourself is not selfish.

We live in a society obsessed with polar opposites.  Black and white, rich and poor, conservative and liberal, gay and straight, fat and thin, etc.  We are inundated with choices of either/or, when the truth is most people in every way fall somewhere between extremes.

One of these is the notion that if you are not selfless, you are selfish.  As such, we often find ourselves believing that self-care is selfish, so we neglect it to care for others.  Then we wonder why we are struggling, when we have accepted this notion and let ourselves take a second-rate place in our own lives.

When we do not hold onto things for ourselves, and we do not care for ourselves, we actually take away our ability to give to others.  We have to be full in order to have enough to share, and because this is an abundant universe that is not a selfish notion.  We are all unique individuals, and we all have different needs and wants, but no matter what those may be, we all need to care for ourselves.  Putting yourself first is perfectly fine, so long as you don’t ignore that there is a world apart from yourself.  You are the center of your own world, but you are also a part of rather than apart from the rest of the world. That’s an important distinction to remain clear on.

Choose challenge.  Choose change.

Change is inevitable.  It will happen, because that is part of life and growth.  Even when you are standing perfectly still, the air around you is changed by your body heat and your breath.  That is the nature of all things.  So rather than struggle from resisting change, accept the challenges that may come from change.

The challenges of Pathwalking will be different for everyone.  Things I find simple and easy you may find unbelievably difficult, and vice versa.  I am a thinker, and while I am empathic, I have often struggled to understand people who are true feelers.  However, while I can be logical about my feelings, actually understanding the meanings of my feelings can be difficult for me.  Then there are people who are doers – they take actions with seemingly little thought or feeling going into them, sometimes with extreme wisdom and sometimes less so.

Many of the challenges thinkers, feelers or doers will experience may be similar, but they may also vary rather widely.  The thing is to make the choices and decide to work on challenges we face, rather than to let choices and decisions out of our control, and work on struggles that drain us and disempower us.

Pathwalking is empowering.

Despite challenges and occasional struggles, Pathwalking, ultimately, is empowering.  Choosing your own path means that you are working on deciding how you want life to be.  When we decide this for ourselves, we open ourselves to discovering our happiness, and that, I believe, is the thing we most want to know.

When you are struggling, it is always possible to face it head-on and turn it into a challenge.  It may not be easy, but I believe empowering the self is always worthwhile.  Choosing my own destiny and deciding how I want to be I believe is key to living the best life I possibly can.

What challenges do you work with regularly, and how do you approach them?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-third entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

Where can you find Positivity?

Positivity can be found anywhere we look.

There are all sorts of thing, big and small, that can bring about positivity.  Sometimes they are easier to see than others.

We are alive and breathing.  We have amazing technology at our fingertips.  We are capable of loving and being loved.  We can have, do or be pretty much anything we desire.  There is sky above us and earth beneath our feet.

I know that it can feel like an impossible struggle to find positivity out there.  Sometimes the weather is upsetting, at times those we love and respect are disappointing us, and don’t even get me started on the state of politics in the world today.  And yet, even with all that taken into account, there are still ways to uncover and relish in positivity.

Sometimes we just need to slow down, take a breath, and maybe step away from things that are giving us more negativity than we desire.  Sometimes we need distractions, finding things to make us smile and laugh or otherwise redirect our thought processes.

Gratitude and inclusion can go a very long ways towards generating positivity.  Doesn’t it feel good to hear someone say “thank you?”  Do you know that saying “thank you” can be just as powerful, if not more so?  Expressing gratitude in our lives builds positive energy like nothing else can…and it’s really, really easy.

Perfect example – today in the United States is Memorial Day.  I want to say Thank You to everyone who has given of themselves to serve the country and protect and defend what we believe in.  Thank you, also, to those who offer the closest support to these men and women.  Thank you.

Our society is currently experiencing a real problem with exclusion.  We are being artificially divided by race, color, creed, religion, gender, and any other artifice one could devise so that those who feel they are in power can stay there.  When we work to be inclusive instead, however, we can generate an unbelievable amount of positivity, and when we work together we all benefit.

Yes, finding positivity can feel pretty hard.  But finding and generating positivity is good for our overall wellbeing, and it is always available to us – we just have to seek it out, and keep ourselves open to it.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing that we can find positivity almost anywhere that we look for it, we can open ourselves up to new ways to feel good and be happier.  When we make the effort to uncover and partake of positivity, we make ourselves feel healthier, and as such we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings in the collective consciousness.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the one hundred seventy-fourth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

In relation to Positivity, check out my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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Why Walk Your Own Path? You Control More Than You Think

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.

This can be a particularly difficult concept to believe, but that doesn’t lessen the truth of it.  You are in control over how you think, how you feel, and how you act.

I know that sometimes it feels like that control is really, really limited.  Truth is, however, that the only limitations are those that you yourself place.  Otherwise, you have far more power and capability to change your life as you would most desire than you probably believe.

I created Pathwalking with the intent of taking control over my life, and creating the destiny I believe I am meant for.  I have long known that the standard courses in life were not for me, and overall I have not taken those particular paths.

One career since college?  Nope, not at all.  I have held numerous jobs, but not followed a single career path until fairly recently.  Marriage in my late twenties or early thirties and raise kids?  Nope, didn’t get married until my early forties, and we’re not going to produce children.  Buy a house, use it to build equity and maintain stability?  While I have been a homeowner, the current plan is to not buy again anytime soon, and rent for the purpose of mobility.

Why am I pointing these out?  Because it is way too easy to let society dictate control over our lives.  We live in a society that discourages us from striking out on our own path, rather than choosing something not-the-normal.  Rather than empower the individual, our society prefers to keep us underfoot, at the whim of our bosses, our religious and political leaders, our supposed superiors.

You are In Charge of You

Nobody is superior to anybody else.  It does not matter if they have more education, more money, more experience or are older than you or more specialized, the only person you answer to, when all is said and done, is you.  The only power anyone else enjoys over you is in place because you have given it away.

That is a particularly hard pill to swallow.  We are so indoctrinated into this idea that other people can control us, that other people can be responsible for our emotions and actions, that we cannot believe this is only true because we allow it to be.  Other people are only able to affect us as much or as little as we allow them to.

For example, let’s say you were in a relationship, but then your partner unceremoniously dumped you.  Yes, you feel hurt, probably betrayed, and upset…but chances are you blame them for hurting you.  They caused you to be hurt, they treated you poorly, and in all likelihood your feelings and opinion of your former partner will only spiral downwards from there.

Yes, it was the action on the part of your former partner that caused those bad feelings.  Yes, it is perfectly normal and totally human to feel hurt, betrayed and upset.  But, you are the one feeling these feelings. As such, you get to choose how long you will hold onto them, and how far along the downward spiral you care to travel.

You are the only one who can feel how you feel.  While there are uncountable outside influences that can and will effect how you feel, you are the only one who actually feels what you feel.  As such, the person who has caused you to hurt only hurts you for as long as you allow them to have that power over you.

Taking another step from here, you and only you are responsible for your actions.  Nobody can make you do anything you do not choose to do.  Yet because our society is so keyed into not being accountable for anything, it is easy to place the blame for bad actions we have taken -outside of ourselves.

Take Back Your Power

When you understand that you are the one in control of your own thoughts, feelings and actions, you get to choose how much of that control to exert.  You will feel upset for as long as you hold onto it, and you will not take an action that is not of your own accord, unless you choose to and blame it on another.  You are the one who gets to decide.  You get to choose.

You will notice over the coming weeks changes to this blog.  I am studying new ideas to improve what I share here, and that means things will be changing.  Since change is inevitable, happens whether we want it or not, I am exerted control over change, and choosing to alter this how I desire the change to be.

Last week I explained how intention is the reality of control.  Intention is composed of thought and feeling and action, and you are the only person who can control all of your thoughts, your feelings and your actions.  Nobody else can choose for you, nobody else can be in control, unless you allow them to be.  You can keep the power over your thoughts, feelings and actions, or you can give it away in part or total.  That is your decision.

Consciousness creates reality.  Recognizing our own control over the vast majority of our lives, we can be empowered to make almost anything we can imagine of them.  We are free thinkers; we are the only ones who feel the things we feel, however we feel them; we are the only ones who can act on our own thoughts and feelings.

You are in control of more than you believe yourself to be.  When you recognize this, embrace it and see just how endless the possibilities are before you.

What feels out of your control that you can take back for yourself?

 

This is the two-hundred eighty-second entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for and my personal experiences with walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

If you enjoy Pathwalking, you may also want to read my Five Easy Steps to Change the World for the Better.

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