The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Gratitude

Thank you.

These are two words that mean more than almost any others you can say.  They convey gratitude.  And gratitude is something we all too readily take for granted.

It is pretty much impossible to get anywhere in life without being grateful for where you have gotten to, and for what you have.

And yet gratitude is something that just does not come easily for many people.  We get so caught up in the bad news, the insanity of various and sundry inhumane acts against people and animals, cares, worries and fears that we lose gratitude for the good we have.

What’s more, we often make mountains out of relative mole hills.  Sure, our jobs may be imperfect, our bank accounts may have less in them than we would like, the government is making us frustrated and angry, and we might have a hard time with certain people and their actions and personalities…but we have so very much for which we can be grateful.

We have opportunities.  We have people who can help us.  We have friends.  We have families.  We have ‘things’.  Maybe they are imperfect, maybe they are not all that we want – but we have them, and we should be grateful for that.

Every self-help guru, every new age teacher, many respected spiritual leaders and influential people speak of the power of gratitude.  They do not let a day go by when they do not express gratitude for all the good they have in their life, no matter how large or how small.  And they clearly seem to be amongst the happiest, most content people we see in this world.

Thank you.  Two simple words that are incredibly large and powerful.  These two words can bring about gratitude not just for ourselves, but for those around us.

What IS gratitude, anyhow?  Dictionary.com defines it thusly:

Gratitude

noun

the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful: He expressed his gratitude to everyone on the staff.

Gratitude is about feeling grateful and thankful.  Let’s examine the definition of grateful:

Grateful

adjective

1. warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful: I am grateful to you for your help.

2. expressing or actuated by gratitude: a grateful letter.

3. pleasing to the mind or senses; agreeable or welcome; refreshing: a grateful breeze.

These are all things that invoke a positive feeling.  And as I have stated many times before in this blog – positive feelings begets positive things.  And gratitude is a wholly positive, wholly good feeling.

If, as I have postulated previously, each of us really wants to find contentment and happiness in our lives, then anything that can help to bring that about is a good thing.  Gratitude, as such, very much falls into this category.

In my own experience I am constantly amazed by the power inherent in this simple notion.  I find that feeling grateful for all the things I have in my life makes me feel better about the things I might be lacking, or the things I want but do not have, or even the things I have no control over.

But that, of course, is the hard part.  Letting go of the wants, the desires, and the sense of need is nearly as hard as letting go of the feelings of lack, loss, and hopelessness.  Remembering to be grateful, and making the effort to express gratitude is both incredibly simple and insanely difficult.

Part of the problem we have is outside influences.  There are so very many things we have no control over which effect our mood, our happiness, and our feelings.  This is why, over the past couple years, I’ve stopped watching the news, and reading much beyond headlines on the web.  Nothing can be quite so infuriating as the barrage of negativity, politics, and other information the news presents us on a daily basis.  It makes it terribly hard to be content, let alone happy.

The other problem comes from within.  When things are hard; when we are struggling to make ends meet and our families and friends are not as supportive as we might need, being grateful for what we have is difficult at best.  When our mood is down, when we feel negative, gratitude seems like a chore.

But through gratitude, we can turn this entire thing around.  By showing gratitude for the things we DO have, we can find the mood shifters, the things to be positive about, the good things we have in life.  This in turn will let the warmth, pleasure and sense of appreciation change how we are feeling.

There is of course an important component of this that can be an added complication.  It is not enough to say “thank you” unless there is feeling behind it.  Like an apology, if there is no feeling, no sincerity behind it, it is an empty, hollow thing.  But when “thank you” includes not just the words, but the feelings, it is that much more powerful.  It means that much more.

Don’t believe me?  Look at all the celebrities and teachers and well-known people who tell you about the power of gratitude.  The Dalai Lama, Oprah, Deepak Chopra, Paulo Coelho, Tony Robbins; these are just a few people who come to mind.  But gratitude starts smaller, it starts at home.  Our parents taught us the power of gratitude when we were still children.

Saying “Please” and “Thank you” was an important thing my parents taught me.  Ask nicely, say please. Say thank you for everything you receive.  Write thank you notes.  Say thank you for the nice thing you got.  Say thank you.  The incredible importance of this gets lost as we get older, and have to deal with “adult” issues.  But it is just as true for us now as it was when we were children.

It is so easy to forget the power of thank you.  But it means so much to me, you and those around us that it’s something we all should be more conscious of.

Next time you are lamenting the things you do not have; next time you are feeling bad about the things in your life that are lacking: remember the power of saying thank you, and the power of gratitude that comes with it.  Remember that by being thankful for what we have already, we can be more content, more happy – and then draw more of what we want to ourselves.

Thank you.

What are you grateful for?

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