Most people are familiar with the Golden Rule, and the phrase “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.”
What ends up being neglected is the notion to do unto yourself as you wish to have done unto you.
It is very easy to get caught up in looking out for your family and your friends and their wellbeing. Sometimes it’s just easier to take on and deal with other people and their problems and needs and wants and desires and so on. It is thoroughly important that we do well by and for the people in our lives.
The issue that this can cause, however, is self-neglect. We get so distracted by our need to be good to and for the people in our lives that we don’t treat ourselves particularly well. We don’t take the time to craft for ourselves, give proper attention to diet and exercise, and we sacrifice our own wellbeing in the interest of being well to others.
In a universe of abundance there is no need to sacrifice. Temper, compromise, adjust to achieve balance, but sacrifice is a step further than is necessary. Making yourself unhappy or outright miserable so that someone else is going to have a good experience is backwards – you need to be whole and content to give and do to others well.
Pathwalking is a different journey for everyone. My path is not your path or his path or her path, but sharing what I learn as I walk my path can help you to walk yours. I want to choose the destiny before me, and to make my way in the world in a manner that will most bring me contentedness and ultimately happiness.
In my life I have often sacrificed my time, my energy, my money, my focus, my fitness so that I could give more to those I cared about. What I did not realize in doing this was that I was giving from a place of lack, and found that where I sought fulfillment actually caused me to need more.
Simply put – if you begin with an empty bank account, and try to give money away as though the account is full to overflowing, you build up a negative balance, and incur penalties. If I take no time for myself, but give of my time to the point where I am neglecting my own needs, eventually I’ll incur a ‘penalty’, such as suffering a bout of depression or feeling general emotional emptiness or a physical illness or some other complication.
People don’t realize how important it is to give from a full account so that you are not sacrificing. Whether what you are giving is time, emotional support, advice, money, love, or pretty much anything else you can think of, you yourself have to be full.
No one is full all the time. We all have good days and bad days and off days and so on and so forth. This does not mean you cannot give when you are not perfectly full, but we need to be better about knowing ourselves, and loving ourselves so that we do not wind up sacrificing in order to be giving.
Doing unto others as you would want done unto you is important. If you treat people harshly or badly or negatively you are telling the universe that is exactly what you want in return. On the other side of the coin, if you treat yourself harshly or badly or negatively, you are telling the universe that is exactly what you want in return.
This is not about Karma, this is about like attracting like. If you give good, you draw good to you. If you give bad, you draw bad to you. Everything being energy, you are setting your frequency, and you are choosing whether it’s a positive or a negative setting you will broadcast.
This is why it is important that you do unto yourself as you would have others do to you. Love yourself, give yourself praise and acknowledgement of your own worth. It makes it far easier when you are starting from your own full account to give and do unto others in the most positive manner possible.
I am my own worst critic. I am notorious for over-analyzing myself, how I do the things I do, and putting sharp focus on my perceived imperfections. I am a master at sabotaging my own well-being. Having come to recognize this, however, I am striving to be less critical, and more complimentary. If I find I need to be critical about something, I am working on being constructively critical, rather than reproachful. I am working on being fuller for my own good before I give to anyone else.
It is not selfish to do unto yourself as you would have others do to you. It is self-interest, and self-love, and knowing your own merit that lets you fill your account to full and even overflowing, so that you can more confidently and positively do unto others. When the self-account is full, the finding, choosing and walking your own path is that much more rewarding.
How do you treat yourself?
This is the one-hundred ninth entry in my series. These weekly posts are specifically about walking along the path of life, and my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Thank you for joining me.