The Ramblings of the Titanium Don

Explorations of Conscious Reality Creation and Other Matters

What Do I Do With The Obstacles of My Own Making?

Many of the obstacles I encounter in life are of my own creation.

Everybody encounters obstacles along the way.  Some are out of our control, such as weather and traffic.  Many, however, only exist because we allow them to.

ObstaclesThis blog has evolved since its initial creation, in order to focus on how consciousness creates reality.  I share my ideas because I know I am not alone in doing what I do.  But I also share because I believe that it empowers my journey along the way.

This week I have written about the empowerment that comes from caring, and how anticipation can be used to help us along our paths.  Crossing the bridges is my most personal weekly post, so please bear with me while I get into this.

The vast majority of the obstacles I run into are of my own making.  I have written about my tendency to self-sabotage, or to let my fear of rejection stay my hand, but the biggest obstruction I regularly encounter is my own inner-dialogue.

Everybody has an inner-dialogue.  I have referred to this before as self-talk.  Frequently, when we say I AM we follow it with unkind things.  This is a conscious creator, which is why it’s important to be so aware of it.

Beneath the conscious use of I AM, there is a subconscious inner-dialogue that runs on.  It is that voice which I find presents the greatest obstacle to me, at least.  Why?  Because that voice is one of doubt, of second-guessing, and of inner criticism.

It’s that nagging little voice that tells me that I am unworthy.  That I am undeserving of the life I want to create.  That my mantra of mightiness is bullshit.  This nagging voice is frequently unkind, skeptical and cynical.

Self-created obstacles are infuriating.

A great deal of what I share in this blog is a part of my work in being more aware of what I am thinking. Awareness of thought in turn leads to better awareness of emotion.  When we give our thoughts feeling, this in turn helps us manifest what we want.  That’s conscious reality creation in action.

I know a lot of people who think this is bunk.   More hooky-spooky new-agey BS.  Because I have used this successfully, I know that it can be done.  And yet, I still have doubts.

Some among my friends are supportive of this.  It’s not that other friends and family members aren’t supportive; they just view my belief as different from their own.  Mostly, I think, they live in a more specific reality, where you have to do certain things in life, and some dreams are too impossible to make into realities.

Everyone experiences the opinions and ideas of others, all their lives.  In time, this will embed itself into your subconscious.  This is where that inner-asshole takes root.

Please note – I am not blaming anyone for this.  I am an adult, and I know that my thoughts are my own.  It’s wholly up to me to not just recognize this and its origin, but to change it.  Or not.

That voice inside my head is fearful, frequently negative and full of disbelief.  You want to be a best-selling author?  Almost nobody succeeds at that.  You want to be wealthy?  Maybe you should have become a Doctor or Lawyer like your mom has suggested.  Look at all the time you waste in a given day.  How can you think you are worthy of success, you keep doing stupid things and making mistakes.  You suck at rolling dice.  See why this is such an obstacle?

Obstacles of my own creation are mine to remove, too.

Friends refer to these sorts of thoughts and feelings as brain weasels.  Little annoying rodents running about, mucking everything up.  Silencing them, or removing them is a major challenge.  Yet I know it is the key to manifesting the life I am striving to create.  I know that that inner-dialogue needs to be evicted from my brain.

How?  How do I stop it?  What can I do to remove this obstacle to my life’s works?  Currently I am employing daily meditation, frequent recitation of a powerful mantra, and writing these blog posts to address this.

All good, and it helps me be more aware…but I find that this horrid inner-dialogue is still running.  Telling me all the mistakes, failures, poor choices and time-wasting I have done in the past or present is all that really matters.  It tells me my intentions, successes, good choices and work achieved in the past or present cannot make-up for that.  I should stop trying to consciously create reality, because it’s impossible, I should get over myself, and accept my place in life.

How do I combat that?  Normally I would write that I do not know.  However, that’s just an excuse.  “Do or Do Not, there is no try.”

First – I thank that inner dialogue.  Thank you for trying to protect me from myself.  I know that you are scared that I cannot handle the change that this will bring about.  But in truth, I want and need this.  I can do this.

Second – I have to listen for that voice, and shut it down when it comes.  Trap those brain weasels and turn them loose into the wild.

Third – I need to truly release this.  It is up to me to cry, to scream, to talk to myself and talk it out.

Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.

Every self-help and new-age book about the law of attraction and its ilk that I have read or listened to says the same thing.  Our subconscious is programmed in our youth.  Though we take a lot of that on as our own, in truth it belongs to our parents, our teachers, our relatives and our friends from childhood.  That is where this awful inner voice comes from.  This is how we create most of our self-made obstacles when we work to consciously create reality.

I have my work cut out for me.  Thank you for reading about my struggles.  Please know that I am here for you if you are coping with the same.  Together, we can remove these obstacles we create for ourselves.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me.

 

This is the seventy-fourth entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Enjoying this blog?  Please consider becoming a patron through my Patreon.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Can Anticipation Serve You?

Anticipation can be a double-edged sword.

One the one hand, it can be exciting, full of thrill and unknown wonder.  On the other hand, it can be nerve-wracking, full of dread and unknown horror.

Anticipation is an emotional response to a situation ahead of us.  As such, like all the other emotions we can feel, we can determine HOW this will feel.

AnticipationPathwalking is about choosing for ourselves our own, individual way.  It is living life to the fullest, making choices for how we will experience life.  As such, part of the reason to walk a given path is in order to reach a particular goal at its conclusion.

Anticipation of that goal can help to drive us along.  It can provide encouragement, it can help us to make the small choices that crop up along the way.  The goal a Pathwalker sets is something that will bring them contentment, fulfillment and happiness.  Anticipating that can be exciting.

Some things, however, can be deeply negative to anticipate.  Confrontations, giving and receiving bad news, owning up to mistakes.  Sometimes this is about anticipating how another person involved in this might react, and other times it’s about how it might effect our lives and the paths we travel.

Both aspects of anticipation can involve an increased heartbeat, breathing faster, feeling as though you might burst out of your skin at any moment.  The positive is exciting, and it creates a sense of audacity.  The negative is scary, and it creates a sense of anxiety.

Positive anticipation can be an amazing sensation.  But the negative is one of the worst feelings we can experience.

Change may be constant and frequent, but for many it is still scary.  Even when we are taking action to create change, it can still be unnerving.

Anticipation can be a liar and an opponent.

In The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho’s Alchemist says, “Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.”  That fear is a matter of anticipation.

Frequently we find ourselves in a position to do things that we might anticipate are going to be awful.  We get unexpectedly called into the bosses’ office.  The doctor wants to go over test results.  We have to share news with someone that might cause hurt.  When we fear that this is going to be awful, we can build it up to be utterly terrifying.

Yet more often than not, the concern and fear are worse than what actually happens.  We are so convinced it is going to be awful and cause us or another to suffer, the anticipation of that proves to be far worse than the event itself.

I’ve done this many times myself.  The challenge is to recognize it for what it is, and to work on redirecting my thoughts and feelings.  If consciousness creates reality, then why would I do anything that might create something awful?

The other issue with anticipation comes from it being about a thing ahead.  One of the challenging aspects of walking my own path is that in order to be aware of my thoughts, feelings and actions, it’s important to live in the now.  When the now has direction to a then in the future, holding on to too much anticipation of how great it will be may keep it forever in the future.

This is a paradox that frequently comes up along the way.

Anticipation can be a helper and an ally.

When we anticipate that things ahead are good things, the excitement that this can generate can drive us.  Rather than simply traverse a path to get from point ‘a’ to point ‘b’, anticipating what is to come can build up our energy.  It can provide encouragement along the way.

We are all human.  As such, we are going to have both good days and bad days.  Even when we are striving to walk our own paths in life, there are days this is challenging.  We stumble, we have a hard time meeting obligations, and we find ourselves faced with uncertainty along the way.  When that happens – and it will happen – anticipation of how the achievement of reaching our goal is going to feel in the here-and-now can pull us through.

Excitement in the moment can move us along and help us to get where we want to be.  I don’t know what it will be like to become a best-selling author or to teach conscious reality creation in seminars and really impact people along the way.  However, I am excited to find out.  I anticipate it will feel amazing, and hugely empowering.  I may not be there right this moment, but anticipating what that feels like, and then feeling it now, will help to make it manifest.

At times this can be super challenging.  But I believe that it is completely worthwhile.  We have a choice when it comes to anticipation.  Ally or opponent.  I know which I would prefer.

What are you currently anticipating for yourself?

 

This is the three-hundred twenty-first entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for, and my personal experiences with, walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

After more than 6 years of Pathwalking, I have launched a Patreon to garner support for these works, and more.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Does Caring Empower?

Caring for others will always increase Positivity.

Human beings are social creatures.  Yes, there are introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts, but we all still have a basic need for some interaction.  Even the most introverted people I know still give and receive care.

Caring and empathy are connected.  I believe that every reasonable person cares when they see others hurting, whether that is hurting spiritually, emotionally or physically.  Empathizing with people going through things can build tremendous positivity.

When we express our care for others, we share with them.  Often, we wind up working together to create something powerful for the greater good.  Caring is how we build bridges, expand our knowledge and capabilities, and better ourselves and those around us.

Last week the United States had another tragic school shooting.  Most reasonable people care that this continues to be a massive problem, even though our government is turning a blind eye.  The people who care want to work to offer more than just “thoughts and prayers”, but to take actual action to ensure that this stops happening.

The survivors of that shooting are working together to change the conversation.  They are pushing to open real dialogue, and start talking about making new laws and effecting some real change.  Many others around the country, showing how much they care about this issue, are offering to support these actions by taking actions of their own.

Manifestation of anything begins with thought.  Then, we need to give it feeling.  From there, taking intentional action can allow for consciousness to create reality.  When we are all caring for one another and looking out for one another, rather than fighting against and opposing, we have the power to do truly amazing things.

Some believe caring is weakness.  They could not be more wrong.

Caring for one another builds everyone up.

Positive energies are higher frequency than negative ones.  Higher frequencies are more empowering to everyone.  Opposition and standing against people and things is often a low-vibration approach.  Empathy, unity, caring and standing for things we want to create is a high-vibration approach.  Consciousness creates reality.  When we focus on the things we don’t want, we create more of them.  Conversely, when we focus on what we DO want, we create more of that.

Caring EmpowersLiving in a society that cares for one another and has empathy is good for us all.  We need to work together to help those less fortunate than us to get better.  Shaming those who are poor, coping with mental Illness, struggling with addictions or working two or three jobs to make ends meet lowers everyone’s frequencies.

Rather than standing in opposition to the people who make it clear that they don’t care, we need to stand together to empower ourselves, and not allow them to disempower anyone anymore.

Caring for the wellbeing of other people empowers everyone.  It makes us all stronger.  It is time we stand together and show that caring and doing good to effect change to make us safer and stronger outweighs greed, selfishness, and political power.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.

Knowing that caring for one another makes us each stronger, we can and should express more empathy for one another.  When we care, we work together to manifest a better world, and when we work to help each other out, we manage to empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the two-hundred and eleventh entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

 

Why Does Empathy Matter?

Empathy can better the world around us.  For what it’s worth, I am an empath.

What that means is that I can feel the emotions of people around me, sometimes better than I can feel my own.  The difference between simply feeling empathy and being an empath is that, as an empath I ALWAYS feel things.  With empathy, it is an emotion that can be switched on and off far more easily.

EmpathyBecause I am an empath, I frequently find myself experiencing emotions outside of myself, and it can be a bit jarring at times.  However, it is in part because of my empathic senses, I shared everything I blog about with you.

Why?  Because I know if I am having thoughts and feelings on the topics I choose to write about, you probably have had similar ones.  Maybe not exactly the same, since we are all different from one another, but similar.

How we feel the emotions we feel differs.  Depth, sensation, the actual way in which we feel things varies from person to person.  This boils down to every single emotion, because we are individuals.

However, and this is really important, the similarities in what these emotions are shouldn’t be ignored or disregarded.  And, further, nobody’s emotions and sense of feelings are greater or lesser than anyone else’s.

Have you ever been told that you didn’t love someone as much as they loved you?  Or that you didn’t hurt as much as they did?  The truth of this is that while we can experience the same emotions, we won’t necessarily feel them the same way.  The depth, frequency, sensation and overall understanding is going to vary depending on who you are, how you process things, and other random and not-so-random variables.

I believe that my empathic ability helps me to be a better writer, fiction or otherwise.

Empathy is not just for an empath.

As I look at my social media feeds, I am almost overwhelmed by a lot of what I am seeing.  The world we live in today is rocked by so much fear, so many messages of scarcity and lack.  One thing that I think would be of tremendous help to the world would be more empathy.

Look at the politicians here in the USA.  Because they care far more about themselves and their contributions from the NRA and other special interests, they do nothing but offer meaningless “thoughts and prayers” for the latest shooting victims.  Maybe enacting some gun control laws and making mental health care less stigmatized and readily available to people?  Nah, we don’t need that.  Rather than show some empathy to real people with real struggles, they have nothing for anyone but themselves and those who benefit them.

When our “leaders” do not need to have empathy, people take their cues from them, and don’t feel the need to have it either.  How many people feel a few deaths are a small price to pay for the right to bear arms?  What about the people who think health care doesn’t need to be readily affordable for everyone?  How many people think they their struggles are greater than anyone else’s, and that there is not enough, so they must keep others away?

Empathy allows you to put yourself in the other person’s shoes.  This is where some confuse this for sympathy.  I can best describe it thus: sympathy is saying, “wow, I’m so sorry you are going through that,” whereas empathy is saying, “I see how you are feeling, and I want to understand your feelings.”  Empathy is understanding, and I think we need a lot more of that in this world.

Empaths tend to want to understand.

The things I write are, in part, for me.  I have these really cool stories I need and want to write out, and these ideas about how consciousness creates reality I need to explore.  As an empath, I want to understand, but I also want to help others to understand.  This is why I feel the need to share my stories, because I think they can be openings for other people’s imagination.  Because I believe that consciousness can create incredible realities, I want to share my own process with this.

Feeling empathy towards other people is how we build bridges and create the best world we can.  Empathy is where we can see that this is a world of abundance with room for more prosperity and good for everyone.

When you see the terrible things happening in the world at large, consider your response.  Can you empathize with people who are suffering?  I think that if we find and feel more empathy, we can do a whole lot more to make this world a better place for everyone.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me.

 

This is the seventy-third entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Does Love Matter?

Love is far simpler than we tend to make it.

Storytellers across the ages have been informing us that love is this grand, complex, amazing thing.  And while it certainly can be, in truth it is much less grandiose.

I have frequently written here about the ability we all possess to manifest the things we want in life.  We are, at our ultimate core, energy.  Energy vibrates at various frequencies.  Low frequency vibration draws low, negative things to us.  High frequency vibration draws higher, positive things to us.

Like attracts like.  That is the Law of Attraction.  Yes, I know some people consider this notion to be total hooky-spooky, new-agey, hippy-dippy, crunchy granola bullshit.  Lots of different books and self-help and spiritual guides have been written about this idea, some more, some less credible than others.

LoveThe thing of it is, when you actually experience this notion for yourself, you can’t help but believe.  I have had too many experiences over the years where I know that I succeeded at consciously creating my reality.  I had a thought, gave it unwavering feeling, and took intentional actions that got me where I needed and wanted to go.

Pathwalking is taking actions to move the thoughts and feelings into reality so as to manifest what we want for our lives.  I have written before that I see three ways to live.  Be a passenger in the car that is life and life live you; curl up in a ball and await death; get behind the wheel of your life-car and take life out for a spin around town.  Pathwalking is choosing roads to traverse as you move through life.

Some days are easier than others.  One of the best ways to manifest our desires is to work with love.

Love is high frequency.

Returning to the notion of the frequency of vibrations, the highest frequency is love.  For many, though, this idea makes it seem largely unattainable.  I have a lot of single friends who lament that today is Valentine’s Day, and they haven’t anyone to love.  Except in reality, love is much easier to find and feel.

We have been led to believe that love involves choirs of angels singing and various other shenanigans.  But love is much, much more than that.  Love is in the people we call friends and family, pets, arts, and numerous every-day happenings.  Love is constantly surrounding us, but because we hold these oversized notions of what it can and should be, we frequently misunderstand it.

When closely into this, you will see that we choose to use a lot of alternative words and phrases to talk about love.  For example, The Force.   Yes, I know this is science fiction, but that doesn’t mean the message isn’t valid.  As Obi-Wan said of The Force, “It’s an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together.”  This is a perfect description of love in its purest form.  It’s everywhere, all around us.  We just have to recognize and engage with it.

We live in a society that frequently focuses on lack, scarcity, and competition.  The truth is, however, that we live in a universe of abundance, plenty, and compassion.  Recognizing the high frequency vibration of love opens us to receive this message, and to create more incredible things.

Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to lose sight of this.  So much negativity, hatred, contempt, greed, and a lack of empathy is expressed all across social media, it can be discouraging.  But because like attracts like, we can change it.

You have more love than you realize.

Today is Valentine’s Day.  I am going to state, certainly not for the first time, that I am not a fan of this particular holiday.  One of the things I dislike the most about this holiday is the expectation of artificial acts and expressions of love.  This is not a one-day-a-year thing, love is everyday.

Love is a much simpler construct than we tend to recognize.  It is the sun warming the world; the rain watering the flowers; the wind billowing the sails; a song bringing tears to your eyes.  It is almost unimaginable how vast the concept truly is, and how much it encompasses.  Love is a force for creating Positivity.

You are loved.  Doesn’t matter if you are married, dating, single, whatever.  You are loved.  The Powers-That-Be helped your core energy into the meat suit you’re roaming the planet within because you provide a value to the world.  Maybe you know what it is, and maybe you don’t, but you matter.  You are loved.

When we better recognize that we are loved, we become better empowered to consciously create reality.  That is why love is the highest frequency we can vibrate at.

There is one really important thing I want to clarify here.  Many people will tell you that they have been hurt by love.  Love stinks, is blind, deaf, dumb, and infuriating.  The truth is, however, that love cannot be the source of hurt.  Feeling a lack or scarcity of love is where we find and create hurt.  Also, when we mistake other emotions such as lust, obsession, longing, desire, and worship for love, they can be sources of hurt.

Further, we have far more control over how we feel than we generally take.  We tend, however, to let things linger that we should let go of.

Love empowers.

We all have things happen to us along the way that will cause us to feel bad.  The severity of some of these things will also cause feelings to linger.  Some are easier than others to let go of.  But there are things that happen to us that make us feel deep sadness, which it can be difficult to shake for any number of reasons.

Love can temper this.  This is because love is an emotion of empowerment.  When you recognize that you are loved, you can employ this to feel better.  It is through feeling loved that we can overcome anything, whether it’s physical, emotional, or spiritual.  When we see that we are loved, we can move mountains.

When you see that love is unbelievably abundant, you can manifest just about anything you can imagine.

Do you recognize and know, really KNOW, that you are, in fact, loved?

 

This is the three-hundred-twentieth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for, and my personal experiences with, walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

After more than 6 years of Pathwalking, I have launched a Patreon to garner support for these works, and more.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Does Inspiration Create Positivity?

Inspiration comes in many forms.

Different things inspire different people, of course.  People can find inspiration in any of the five senses.  The taste of chocolate.  A piece of music.  The smell of fresh brewed coffee.  Sunlight in your eyes.  The feel of silk beneath your hands.  That sense of comfort and love from those closest to you.  Any of these alone or in combination can spark the imagination and inspire great things.

InspirationInspiration has been personified throughout history.  The Nine Muses of Greek antiquity, Calliope, Cleo, Polyhymnia, Terpsichore, Thalia, Melpomene, Urania, Erato, and Euterpe, for example.  Each Muse was believed to provide inspiration to writers, artists, great leaders and the like.  Even to this day we use the term “finding my muse” when we speak of a quest for inspiration.

What if, along the way, you become uninspired?  What if you find it hard to be inspired?  If those things that inspired you before no longer hold the magic they did, how can you be inspired?

Everyone and everything changes.  Life today may be similar to life yesterday.  And it might seem the same tomorrow.  But every day is different.  Sometimes this is subtle, such as sun or clouds and ambient temperature.  Sometimes this is not, like an unexpected relationship or some tragic event.  No matter what it is, life is never the same from day to day, even when it feels as though it is.  As such, what inspires you now may not inspire you later.

Because inspiration can come in so many forms you can always find something new.  A new stimulus to the senses can have a different effect on you, and awaken your desire to consciously create your reality.

Inspiration builds positivity.

InspirationInspiration is how our world can be changed for the better.  I has led to the design of monolithic architecture, sculpture, paintings, poetry and grand works of entertainment.  George Lucas was inspired to created the Star War universe.  It was inspiration that led Martin Luther King Jr. to declare to the world “I have a dream,” and Ghandi to seek independence for his nation.

Inspiration is not always so grand.  Feeling inspired can be the reason you get out of bed in the morning.  Inspiration can cause you to clean your home.  You may find yourself inspired to ask that person out and begin a relationship.  Inspiration is what leads you from one path in life to choose another.

We can always seek out and find inspiration.  When we do, we can use this to find, create, and have a more positive, healthy attitude and life.  Feeling inspired may at times seem elusive, but it is always out there, whether it finds you or you find it.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.

Knowing that we can be found by inspiration or find inspiration of our own lets us awaken possibility.  When we have inspiration, great or small, it can endow us with the ability to open ourselves to wholly new and different experiences, which helps us to empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the two-hundred and tenth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

 

 

What Makes Me Feel Satisfied?

I have worked any number of jobs that didn’t leave me feeling satisfied.

We all have to earn a living, right?  You can’t just laze about your home, on a beach, or wander aimlessly all the time, because clothing, food and shelter cost money.  Also, frankly, doing nothing at all gets pretty boring pretty fast.

SatisfiedWhen I started college, I remember preparing to register for my first classes.  It was orientation, and I had not yet chosen my major.  I told my dad that I was going to major in procrastination and hesitation, with a minor in bureaucratic red tape.  He laughed, I laughed…and then I ruined his golf game because I get in line with my temporary advisor at 6am so that I could get into the classes I desired to take, and was done early.

The irony of this is that, in many respects, I really did choose procrastination and hesitation as my major.  Yes, I got my Bachelor’s degree in four years, but after college I was aimless.  The degree program and studies in college that I chose satisfied me, but were not, in the real world after college, sustainable.

Thus I spent my mid-twenties bouncing between jobs, and places I called home.  Then, I got hit by a car crossing a street, and would become the Titanium Don.  A year of my life went to recovery.

My body was changed, not just because of the fused bones in my right leg and titanium plates in my shoulder, but the muscle groups recovered in many unique ways.  Because I was not satisfied with the notion of recovering at any-old pace, I pushed, and pushed, and got past several of the obstacles my doctors expected.  No limp when I walk, and full use of my right arm.

What does it take for me to be satisfied?

After my recover and my return to a more-or-less normal life, this question continued to pop up.  What did it take for me to be satisfied by my life?  I found a job I was good at, but that bored me.

It was during this period, however, that Seeker was professionally edited.  Not only did my novel get thoroughly improved, but I learned how to strengthen my own writing, and became a far more skilled editor.

Perhaps it was my equal fears of success and failure, and the underlying fear of abandonment…or maybe it was my penchant for indecision, procrastination and hesitation…but I was not satisfied.  Satisfaction didn’t come from dating, the new home I moved into didn’t bring it about, and while I got a job I actually truly loved, the pay was not so satisfying.

My best friend told me on more than one occasion that consciousness creates reality.  I sort of accepted that idea, but didn’t really give it much attention.  Except on more than one occasion, I had used it successfully.

As I began to explore this idea, and found the best therapist I had ever seen, my life began to shift.  I was starting to find things that satisfied me.  I started to date an amazing woman, I got a couple different opportunities to publish some of my writing, and the notion of a New Year’s Action birthed Pathwalking.

It has been more than six years, now, since I started blogging weekly.  Rather than continue to submit my novels to agents and garner more rejections, I decided to self-publish.  That woman I was dating became my wife, and I began to realize that more things in my life made me feel satisfied than I had been acknowledging.

The satisfaction from the little things is actually huge.

When we look at the “big picture” of the society we live in, it’s easy to lose sight of the little things in life.  Every single day presents new opportunities, new options, new experiences.  Of course life throws curveballs, and we need to do things that are less fun like taking out the garbage, cleaning the toilet, and scooping the litter boxes.  Expressing gratitude for the things and people we have in our lives can help us feel satisfied, even in the face of bad days.

Currently, I have reached a point in my life where I am working on manifesting the life I want.  I am seeking ways to earn my living with my writing, because this is what makes me feel most satisfied.  This weekly section of the blog was created was so that I could explore how to bridge the gaps I envision between the styles of writing I do.  This blog, and the work in conscious reality creation, is as important to me as the fictional worlds of fantasy, Steampunk and sci-fi I write.

Published novels can lead to pay.  Nothing I have put out has become any sort of best-seller, yet.  Sure, I suppose it is a form of arrogance on my part to desire that sort of status, but as a writer with a lot of characters, stories and worlds in my head, I believe it is possible.

Conscious reality creation is an idea I can take several steps beyond this blog.  Maybe a podcast, and possibly speaking engagements to explore how this can and does work for everyone, when we are aware of what we think, how we feel, and the intentions of our actions.

Am I afraid of how it might feel to feel satisfied?

Maybe.  I long ago came to the conclusion that my fear of failure has an equal partner in a fear of success, both of which lead to the deeper, underlying fear of abandonment.  It is not the easiest path, but I am striving to create the joy I most desire, and crossing the bridges between my writing styles is the key to that.

I blogged on my author website that I was launching a Patreon.  I have been studying just what exactly Patreon is, and the best description I can provide is this:  Patreon is a place where people have the opportunity to be your patron.  They have a chance to provide you with support for that which you provide to them.  To quote Patreon directly: “Patreon is a membership platform that makes it easy for creators to get paid.”

Why do I want to do this?  What am I aiming to accomplish?  I want to be able to put into action the conscious reality creation I am blogging about.  As I continue to share the ideas of this blog, I want to be able to contribute more to my household and pay bills.

Today, I launch my Patreon.  It is my goal that this will allow me to create more, cross more bridges, and live a life that will bring me satisfaction on more levels.  I believe that what I have to offer is of tremendous value, and while I worry that this might come across as selfish, I believe that there is nothing unreasonable about taking this step.

Thank you for being a part of my journey.  Thank you for your continued support.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me.

This is the seventy-second entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

Why is Feeling Joyful Important?

One of the goals of Pathwalking is to enhance the things in life that make us feel joyful.

I want to work on choosing the life I most desire to lead.  Consciousness creates reality, and I want to choose the reality that brings me joy and happiness.

JoyfulThis can be particularly challenging, especially in today’s society.  We are bombarded every day with horrid, awful, ugly, unpleasant things.  Terrible people, selfishness, greed, and a deluge of messages about lack and scarcity.  Maybe, if we are truly fortunate, for every ten pieces of negative information we receive one piece that’s positive and uplifting.

Because the overarching narrative of our society is one of insufficiency and deficiency, it is really important to keep focused on our own, personal awareness.  Being mindful of what we are thinking, feeling, and from there acting upon is key.

One of the issues that this brings up is selfishness.  Many of us have been raised to put others before ourselves.  That can be family, friends, coworkers, anybody.   We believe that the needs of the many always outweigh the needs of the one, and put ourselves last.  Or worse, when we do something for ourselves, we have to resist the feeling that we are being selfish…or else do twice as many things for other people to make up for it.

Finding things that make us feel joyful is not selfish.  Why?  Because when we feel joyful, we spread that to others.  Like sorrow and grief and all the negative emotions, holding onto and expressing positive emotions is contagious.

What’s the difference between joy and happiness?  For the purpose of this post, it boils down to the abstract versus the emotion.  The concept of happy is broad and vague.  Joyful, however, is a more readily defined emotional state.

Joyful thoughts, feelings and actions create happiness.

What makes me happy is not necessarily the same as what makes you happy.  Perfect example – fencing.  I have been fencing for more than half my life now.  Almost without fail, if I am having a bad day, when I fence it makes me feel happy.  I take great joy in fencing, and while it is slightly less when I am not at my best, it’s still there.  Similarly, writing makes me happy.  I love spilling words out of my head and onto the page or screen.

There are people who find fencing ludicrous and silly.  I know people who find putting down words thoroughly challenging, and unpleasant.  What makes each of us feel joyful and develops happiness varies wildly.  But the importance of manifesting things that make us happy is almost immeasurable.

It is easy to get lost in the seas of social media.  Twitter, Facebook, and don’t even get me started on the rabbit hole that is Pinterest.  However, when we start to focus on the negativity, and see all the greedy, selfish, terrible people in positions of leadership and authority, it can be really hard to find things that bring us joy.

But that makes it even more important that we pause, and be mindful and aware of our thoughts, our feelings, and subsequent actions we take.  If we are holding onto negativity, we tend to create and draw more to us.  How many times, when you felt bad, did you manage to keep finding things to make yourself feel even worse?  That’s conscious reality creation…or, when we are not being mindful, unconscious or subconscious reality creation.

As I traverse the paths of my life, I strive to find opportunities to develop and experience more joy.

Creating joyful things draws more joyful things out.

Neglecting ourselves for the sake of others and sacrificing our goals, our happiness, and anything else is not the noble notion many give it.  Why?  Because it makes the following statement:  Because there is not enough, I will go without.  When we sacrifice our time, energy, money, and so on for other people, we tell ourselves that it’s noble and good in order to counter the negative feelings sacrifice tends to produce.  When we give and give and give of ourselves, but then do no self-care, we deplete what we have.

If the universe is abundant, aren’t we, as extensions of the universe, also abundant?  Yes…but while the universe is made of infinite energy, the energy contained in the meat-suits we occupy on this planet is finite.  This is why we rest, meditate and sleep.  We need to restore our energies, in order to have enough on any given day.  When we sacrifice ourselves, we deplete that energy, and if we deplete too much we get depressed, sick, and even so ill as to threaten our physical existence.

When we take care of ourselves, we have more to share.  This is applicable to the spiritual, emotional and physical levels.  When we do joyful things we build up our reserves, and become more capable of giving more.  When we have more, we can give more.  It’s a stunningly simple concept we still feel we can mostly ignore.

It is not selfish to care for ourselves.  There is a fine line between giving and giving away from a lack mentality.  Giving comes from the heart, and makes us feel good.  Giving away comes from the head, and we have to tell ourselves we’ve done good to counter feeling bad.  Sound familiar?

Let go of any guilt feeling joyful might bring.

This is one of the larger issues we are facing as a society right now.  When so many people have it so bad, how can I feel joyful?  We see all this negativity, and when we find our own positivity, we might just find ourselves feeling guilty for that.

There will always be someone who is experiencing loss, grief, sadness, depression, distress, and every negative emotion you can imagine.  Empathy and compassion are important, but that does not mean we should not do things for ourselves that make us feel joyful.  Why?  Because the law of attraction states that like attracts like.  Feed the negative, it grows.

Every single one of us has had an experience where we were feeling good, and then someone grieving or injured or otherwise hurt happened by.  Suddenly, we feel guilty that we feel good when they feel awful.  This is empathy.  It’s a natural feeling, but we do not need to cease to be happy for them, but rather empathize, show compassion, and let go of the guilt.  Eventually those people will be past their unhappiness, and then your joy can help make them feel good again, too.

Be kind.  Be loving.  Let yourself find joy in the paths you are walking.  Consciousness creates reality, and when we are joyful we can manifest amazing things.

What makes you feel joyful?

 

This is the three-hundred-nineteenth entry in my series. These weekly posts are ideas for, and my personal experiences with, walking along the path of life.  I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way.

Thank you for joining me.  Feel free to re-blog and share.

The first year of Pathwalking, including some expanded ideas, is available here.

After more than 6 years of Pathwalking, I will be launching a Patreon to garner support for these works, and more.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

How Does Joy Create Positivity?

Pure, unadulterated joy.

Don’t you love that feeling?  The freedom, the release, the positivity?  That feeling of comfort and warmth and bliss that makes you smile and remember what it is to be alive?

JoyWe are so inundated with dread, fear, anger, hatred, division and harsh reality.  Everyone is constantly being subjected to grim news and intolerance and denial of joy.  We are slaves to community, to jobs and finances and responsibilities that rob us of pure joyfulness.

I believe that what we all seek in life, when all is said and done, is joy.  We want to feel that sensation, and we want to experience the freedom and positive energy that comes with it.  Almost every act we commit is in search of joyfulness.

Because we are so surrounded by negativity we do not give enough credit to the little things that make us feel joyful.  For example – I have been enjoying the trailers for Avengers: Infinity War, Black Panther, and finally Solo: A Star Wars Story.  For up to two minutes there is that swell of music, the images of heroic characters doing all kinds of cool stuff.  This makes me feel like a kid again, stirs that feeling of bliss within me.  It’s like a drug, coursing through my veins…and that is not a bad thing.

Imagination.  Imagination is joy.  That, for me, involves sharing my ideas for Conscious Reality Creation and my imaginative worlds.  Whether I am creating a blog post, a work of fantasy, Steampunk or sci-fi…or an inventive conversation with an eight-year-old child.

My wife and I used to frequent a Chinese buffet.  The family that runs it are familiar and friendly, and they have two sons.  The younger loves to chat, and somehow we had gotten into a silly conversation about knock-out gas.

The joy of silliness creates positivity

I informed him that the good knock-out gas is always purple.

“But what about green knock-out gas?” he’d asked.  “Turns you inside out.”  Oooooooh.  “Red knock-out gas? “  “Causes farting.”  He laughed.  “What about yellow?”  “Uncontrollable urge to pee.”  “How about blue?”  “Freezes you solid, but your eyes still work.”  And so on and so forth through a rainbow of colors and ten minutes of joyful, unrestrained laughter had passed.

JoyThe takeaway from this is that joy is something we spend too little time on and with.  We need to feel joyful because it is a freedom that is, in many respects, the ultimate happiness.  Joy is the goal of positivity, and we need to seek out the things that make us feel joyful, big and small, for both our mental and physical health.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action.  Knowing how joy is a form of pure positivity, we can strive to find more joyful things in our day-to-day lives.  When we get lost in joyful things, we feel free, and when we feel free we empower ourselves.  When we feel empowered, we often spread that feeling to others around us, and as such can build more positive feelings.  We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings.  When we take away negative feelings, we open up space to let in positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.  Gratitude leads to happiness.  Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude.  Positive attitude begets positive energy, and that is always a good thing.

 

This is the two-hundred and ninth entry of my Positivity series.  It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone.  Feel free to share, re-blog and spread the positivity.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

 

Ten Things Making Me Happy

In response to a great deal of awful things from the start of this year, I want to share with you ten things in my personal life that are making me happy.

While Valentine’s Day is my least favorite holiday, the message of love it conveys is worth spreading.  Rather than keep it to one day designed to generate revenue for florists, chocolatiers and card companies, I think spreading love every day is a fine thing.

10 Things Making me HappyLove begins with the self.  When I love myself, and my life, I can give more love out.  When I am grateful for these things I love, I draw more things to love to me.

This is the Law of Attraction in action.  Consciousness Creates Reality.  The actions we give our thoughts and feelings to will draw good or bad into our lives.

One of the main reasons I write this blog, and post three times a week, is to remind myself about the importance of this.  I desire to manifest some pretty amazing things into my life, and that requires me to be grateful for what I already have.  Sometimes this can be difficult, not because of a lack of gratitude, but more because of outside influences making me feel negative.

Spend any amount of time on Facebook or other social media, and see how positive you can stay.  Read one article about the incredible selfishness of the US President and Congress, and try not to get angry.  When the hobby world I like to spend time in experiences derision, it can be incredible frustrating.

The Ramblings of the Titanium Don, with Positivity on Mondays, Pathwalking on Wednesdays, and Crossing the Bridges on Fridays, is where I can offer up empathy for an all-too-often senseless world.  Thus, I give you some love today.

Ten Things that are making ME happy.

This is in no particular order, fyi.

  1. My friends. I have some of the most incredible friends. They offer me love and support and sounding boards as I walk my crazy paths.  You are incredible people, and you make me very, very happy.
  2. My wife. This might get a tad sappy, and she will probably tell you that this makes her throw-up in her mouth a little. I married an incredible woman.  She is my partner, my equal, my favorite companion.  It never ceases to amaze me how much having someone who understands me like she does matters.  She makes me very, very, happy.
  3. The SCA. The Society for Creative Anachronism has played an integral part of my life for over 26 years now. I have met amazing, talented, wonderful people playing this game, and found my favorite hobby.  Also, the SCA helped get me out of my shell, and I believe is why I am more extrovert than introvert now.
  4. Fencing. While this is a part of the SCA, I need to put it here separately. I have found very few things in life that bring me such joy.  Everything about fencing I love, from the various weapons to the melee combat to the people doing it.  I love teaching fencing to new people almost as much as I love fighting.  If I am having a lousy day, fencing practices ALWAYS make me happy.
  5. Writing. Putting words to the page is joy. I can make words fly and sing in ways that even surprise me from time to time.  Even when I find myself having trouble writing this blog, words on the page make me happy.

Five things that make me happy down, five to go.

  1. Reading. I do not read enough. This isn’t about articles online or social media, this is about books.  Fiction, non-fiction, self-help, whatever…reading is weightlifting for the mind.  No matter how strong I think I am now, reading will make me stronger.  That makes me happy.
  2. Music. As I am writing this, my Writer’s Mix is playing off my old MacBook. This mix is largely movie and TV scores, including the various Star Wars films, Game of Thrones, Lord of the Rings and more.  Also, some classical music and cinematic New-Age by David Arkenstone.  In the car, I usually rock out or play something to sing along to.  Music, however, can alter my mood, and ultimate contribute to being happy.
  3. My cats. We have two cats. They are brats in their own unique way, but when they purr and do adorable things, it’s hard not to feel happy.
  4. My office. We recently moved, and with this I gained a home office. I have created a space that feels akin to a pillow-fort from childhood.  Comfortable, warm, and thoroughly ME.  Every time I come in here, I am home, and that makes me happy.
  5. You. Yes, this is utterly cheesy, but knowing that you have read this, and are reading my blog, makes me incredibly happy. Whether you agree or disagree with the things I write, it makes me happy to know that you read me.  Thank you!

Life can be rough.  We all go through difficult times.  But we can always find things that will make it better.

Hold on to your happy.

When we stressed out, and we feel bad, and the world seems terrible, there is always something we can find that will remind us of happiness.  Nobody can or frankly should be happy all the time.  But even when we are sad, angry, grieving, depressed, or otherwise feeling negative, we can seek out and find things that are happy.  I hope that by sharing some of mine, I can help you find yours.

As always, thank you for crossing the bridges between my worlds with me!

 

This is the seventy-first entry of my personal journey, the Crossing the Bridges series.  My collectively published writing can be found here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my blog (even if you did so before the blog was reformatted).  Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook.  Thank you!

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